Humanity's Cage
by The Lord of Silence
Summary: Matthias Quinn is a boy from nowhere in particular. The place he currently calls home is Shiganshina district, where for the first time he has begun to feel at home. But his world is about to be torn apart and nothing will be the same for him or his friends again.
1. The Fall of Shiganshina

I sighed and shook my head, "should it really come as a surprise?" I asked. "I mean, the Scout Regiment isn't exactly the safest or most promising career a person could wish for."

"What? Are you on their side too?" snapped Eren, the usual light of anger flashing into his eyes.

"That's not what I meant," I said. "Really, I would be worried if your parents were okay with it."

"He's right you know," added Armin, staring up towards where the walls towered 50m up into the sky. "The Scouts suffer more casualties than any other group in existence; your parents don't want you to die Eren."

"Well, it isn't their choice to make is it?" muttered Eren, scowling at the dark water in the canal before us.

We were all silent for a few moments, a faint breeze wafting towards us. Four ten year old kids, sitting by the canal in Shiganshina District. Eren; short dark hair barely affected by the wind, eyes still blazing with a fire that never goes out. Armin; longer blonde hair nudged aside by the flowing air to reveal a pair of keen, yet nervous eyes. Mikasa; her long black hair practically whipped up by the slight wind, her cold hard gaze piercing the very air in front of her. And of course myself: Matthias Quinn, light sandy hair that doesn't get cut as much as I would like, sometimes producing a fringe that masks a pair of green eyes some people have called unsettling. That always made me feel upset, like I'd done something wrong.

Eventually, Armin opened his mouth to speak, but he was cut short by a massive crack and boom that shook the earth and threw me to the ground from where I'd been leaning against the wall of a house. The noise made me go slightly dizzy, so as I looked up I couldn't quite make out what was happening. Then I realised people were crowding into the streets, and my friends were headed that way as well. Picking myself up, I hurried after them, arriving just in time to hear Eren's voice cut off, as his eyes alighted on the thing everyone was looking at. I turned, and froze.

A single, massive hand, the red muscles exposed to the air with no skin drawn over it, was gripping the top of the 50m tall wall, just next to the gate. "That's impossible," I more or less heard Armin whisper, his voice was so husky, "that wall's over 50m high." But impossible or not, the hand was there, a great column of smoke rising from behind it. Then a shape loomed up and forwards out of the grey-white vapours. It was a face, a face that looked like it belonged to something dead. No skin covered it either, a kind of pale white substance forming its nose and stretched partly over its mouth.

"I-is that," I tried to ask, my heart racing inside my chest, "is that a Titan?" A Titan bigger than the wall seemed impossible, but there he was, looming above the sheer smooth surface of rock, dead eyes staring down at the city. Then there was a second great crash and a number of huge chunks of rock went flying into the air. These missiles smashed houses and crushed people in the streets, one landing only a few blocks away from where we stood.

Suddenly Eren was running away down the street, towards his house, Mikasa following him. "Eren, Mikasa, wait!" called Armin beside me, but they were already gone around the corner, out of earshot. I looked at Armin, he was trembling frantically and starring wildly at me. "This is it," he gasped, "that Titan just broke the gate open, they're going to get in. Every single one of us is going to be devoured!"

I didn't know what to say, I just stood there letting the reality of the situation sink in. Finally I said, "no, the gate in Wall Maria is still standing. We have to get out of the city though."

Armin slowed his breathing, and his eyes cleared. "Right. Eren and Mikasa will have gone to fetch Eren's mother, but it's possible that their house was hit by one of those rocks."

"If that's the case," I replied, continuing my friend's train of thought, "Eren likely won't leave until he pulls either his mother, or her body out from the wreckage."

"Neither of us would be able to pull him away by force, and I doubt Mikasa would help us; she won't want to give up on her new family so quickly."

"We need to find an adult who can make them leave, or help get Eren's mom to safety."

"Mr. Hannes!" exclaimed Armin, a new sense of purpose flooding into his eyes.

"Good idea," I agreed. "I'll head to my house and see if I can find my mom. You're family should be fine since you live further away from the gate."

"I hope so," said Armin, biting his lip. "Good luck. I'll see you at the boats all right?"

"Right!" I called out, as I began to run hurriedly through the streets towards my home.

When I got there, the front door was open and no sounds came from inside. I dashed in and up the stairs, calling out for mother, but I got no response. 'She must have already left', I concluded, heaving a sigh of relief. I turned on my heel and started heading for the door out of my room, when I was struck stiff by a great thumping boom from outside. Then another, and another, and another. "Oh no," gasped under my breath, as the thunderous footsteps of a titan pounded past outside.

As quietly as I could I moved down the stairs, and peeked out one of the windows on the ground floor. I couldn't see anything yet, so I supposed it was further away than it sounded. Taking a deep breath to try to calm my nerves, I threw the front door open and dashed out into the street. I turned to start heading for the boats, but before I did I made the terrible mistake of looking over my shoulder.

At about 8m tall, the titan grinned stupidly down at a person clutched in its hands. It was a man I didn't recognise; he was squirming and struggling, but the grip of those long, talon like fingers was like iron. I managed to tear my eyes away as the titan opened its grinning maw, and as I ran I heard a final scream of panic, cut short by a quiet, sickening crunch. I ran and ran and ran, as fast as I could, desperately hoping to reach the boats in time, already convinced in some part of my mind that I'd never make it. Somehow I did though. I was hurriedly ushered on because of my age, and left to stand cramped amongst a mass of strangers.

I watched dumbly as more people were ushered on, then as the boat cast off to the desperate cries of the people left behind. I'd lived in Shiganshina for only the last eight months, but I'd made friends with Armin when we both found ourselves on the wrong end of the local gang. We'd been discussing how plausible the forming a second wing of the military was; one that didn't have to rely on ODM Gear in order to combat the titans. I made the mistake of mentioning their name in front of the wrong people, and Armin and I had to take the consequences. Eren arrived part way through what couldn't in fairness have been called a fight, and Mikasa of course wasn't far behind. That ended things rather quickly. I can't say that made all four of us friends immediately, but it put things on the right track.

Now, everything was over. I could see faint wisps of smoke rising from the buildings, people screaming, and of course, the faint, yet constant pounding of massive feet against the ground. My mother never liked staying in one place for too long, usually not for more than a year. As a result I'd always tried my best not to lay any roots or make any real friends where we were living, but this time I'd done it without thinking, I wasn't sure why, but for the first time I'd felt like I was actually living in a home, and now that home was being trampled under their feet.

I'd never been prone to outbursts of any kind, not sorrow, not anger or even laughter since my father left, yet just this once, I felt truly angry. The injustice of the moment flooded over me, my eyes tinted with a thin haze of tears. "Dam it!" I screamed at the top of my voice, throwing back my head and howling as loud as I could at the sky. Some people looked over at me, but I didn't care. I stared at my shaking hands before plastering them over my face. I tried to block out the world, but it just kept seeping in.

A shadow fell over me, prompting me to take my hands away and look up; we'd past under the wall, we'd be on the other side of Wall Maria in a few moments. It would all be over in just a few moments. I looked down at my hands stained with tears and grimy, with red stains on the finger tips. I ran my hand over my forehead; blood. I must have hit my head on the side of something whilst running and not noticed it. Now that I did notice it, it hurt like hell.

I began to look around, nudging my way through the tight mass of people, checking for any face that seemed familiar. It was difficult to see past all the bodies, and I almost walked clean into Armin when I found him. "Matthias, you're okay!" he gasped.

"Yeah, I think so," I said, wincing slightly as my cut stung me. "What about your family? Did they make it?"

"Yes, everyone. But Eren, his mother isn't here."

"Y-you don't mean..."

"I don't really know, but judging from the looks on his and Mikasa's faces, I can't think of any other real possibility."

"Are, are they both okay?"

"Physically, I think so. I haven't spoken to them yet though. What about your mom? Have you spoken to her yet?"

"No. She is on here then?"

"Yes. I saw her a few times when the boat was less crowded."

Suddenly, there was jolt, and the boat moved out from under the wall, into the safety of the lands behind Wall Maria. As we did I felt my legs tremble a little; we were safe, safe from the horror of the Titans. "Well then," I said, starring back through the water gate to where the buildings of Shiganshina were smashed and burning, "I guess that's it then. We're safe now, its o-" But I never got to finish. For the second time that day there was the ear-splitting crack of shattering rock and tearing metal, followed by a great crash of falling masonry. Immediately everyone threw themselves towards the side of the boat facing the gate. Armin and I were thrust forwards by the press, finding ourselves with a perfect view of the gateway.

There was huge cloud of dust billowing out from what had once been the gate of Wall Maria. Now, light flooded through the open hole, illuminating the hulking silhouette of a 15m tall titan, with massive shoulders and burning eyes. His mouth let out a rush of steam that shrouded him from view, and when it cleared he was gone. Wall Maria was breached. The Titans were truly inside the walls.

Eight months later, and the world feels like hell. After the massive flood of refugees behind Wall Rose, the government organised the largest 'armed' force in our nation's known history from those who had fled, and sent them outside of the walls to retake Wall Maria. The massacre must have been terrible. They went without any plan, without any training and in most cases without any weapons. No one really believed that the attempt at 'territory retrieval' was anything except population control. When all was said and done, about a fifth of the entire population behind the walls perished, and the famines within Wall Rose continued despite the sacrifice of so many.

The wind is cold against skin that really should have more layers of clothing surrounding it. I look up at the sky, grey and hard with a layer of clouds that passes on to the horizon. I'm sitting with my back against a cold stone wall, arms wrapped around my legs. Eren is standing, shouting about something; I'm afraid I stopped listening a few minutes back. It's not that I don't agree with most of what he's saying, it's just that he's ranted and raged about the same things over and over again for the past year month, ever since the reclamation operation. It was just after that that Armin's face turned a rather unsettling shade of grey, and it seems to be permanent. I'm not surprised to be honest, his whole family is gone now because of it. I almost wish sometimes that I could share in my friends' sorrows, but my mother's still here. 'Though of course', I remind myself, 'that may not last for much longer, with the winter hitting this hard.'

Slowly, I begin to drift off to sleep, my mind slipping into unconsciousness as if into a bath. Part of me hopes to find some level of relief, but the rest of me knows better. Sleep hasn't been peaceful for me since before I can remember. I have an unpleasant capacity for nightmares.

Everything is dark, but at least it's no longer cold. No, it's stifling hot and stuffy, so hot that I ought to be sweating profusely, but I'm not. My eyes are closed I realise, 'am I awake again already?' I wonder. I open my eyes to see a forest surrounding me. 'These are remarkably small trees', I try to say to myself, but the words won't come. Oh no. Not this one again. My body moves all of its own accord, all I can do is watch. I look up at the sun and sniff. I can't recognise any of the odours, but my body certainly can. I turn my head sharply in the direction that one of the smells appears to be coming from and despite my best efforts to stop them, my legs begin to move.

I know this dream far too well; I know where I'm going. Strange how I always forget about these dreams until I'm having them again, then they come back with terrifying clarity. At first I'm walking, but as one of the smells grows stronger, my pace increases until I'm running. I emerge from the forest and out onto a flat grassy plain. In the distance is a group of tiny people on equally tiny horses, green cloaks billowing out behind them. I'm more than running, I'm sprinting now, the landscape flying past me.

The group of four horsemen turn their heads and urge their mounts harder in an effort to get away, but they won't escape; they never do. A voice, deep and guttural speaks inside my head, each word drawn out as if it hurts the speaker to use their vocal cords. "Prey, hunt, DEVOUR!"

'No, no stop!' I try to cry out, but I've been silenced.

I'm right on top of the horsemen now; one of them looks up at me, his eyes filled with a mixture of terror and hatred. One of my hands reaches out, larger than his entire body. The man lashes out with what looks like a pair of swords, and a searing pain lances through me. But this time, just like every other time, the attack doesn't stop me, it doesn't save him. I grab him and pull him out of his saddle. On the edge of my vision I can see one of the remaining three flying into the air somehow, but my body doesn't seem to care.

My mouth opens, and I want to scream, want to shut my eyes, but all I can do is watch, as the man gives one final desperate slash at my face with his one free arm. I try desperately to wretch, as the taste of blood and flesh washes over my tongue.

I wake up with a start, my breathing sporadic. 'I was having a nightmare right?' I wonder silently to myself, 'but what happened?' I strain as I try to remember, but all that will come is a sense of brooding horror, and a strange bitter taste in my mouth, a bit like blood.

"Hey Matthias, are you all right?" asks Armin looking worriedly at me from the other side of the alleyway we're all crouching in.

"I suppose so," I reply, conscious of all three sets of eyes now trained on me. "Yes, I'm fine. Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure?" he persists, "you went really pale for a few moments there, and you're sweating."

I put a hand to my forehead and wipe off the droplets from my already perfectly cool skin. 'Why would I be sweating in this kind of weather?' I ponder. 'I guess it must have been a bad one.' "Yes," I say out loud, "I'm sure. Just a rather nasty daydream; something about the Titans I think."

"When is something about them ever good?" hisses Eren. He turns on his foot and looks at all three of us in turn. "Guys, I've been thinking about things, and I've made a choice: I'm going to join the Cadets next year."

I sit bolt upright and stare at him. "Are you serious?" I gasp. "After what you saw in Shiganshina, you want to go back?"

"The only way this nightmare ends is if we win," he responds through gritted teeth, "and we can only win if we fight."

"Then I'm with you," says Mikasa, rising to her feet. Now why doesn't that surprise me? I've never been totally comfortable with Mikasa, I know she's been through two traumatic experiences now, but still I won't deny she frightens me sometimes. Her devotion to Eren borderlines on an obsession, and I suppose that when she gets a bit older she'll realise she's in love with him. Of course Eren doesn't see it, I don't think he ever has. Oh well, give him time.

Armin sighs and stands up as well, "I don't have anyone left besides you guys. So I guess I'll follow you."

I look between all three of them, all clearly resolved in their joint decision. My mind suddenly flashes back to rage I felt watching my home burn, and back to something else, something I can only half remember. Whatever it is, it makes me angry, and that's enough. "Oh what the hell," I sigh as I push myself up to my feet as well, "this life isn't exactly what I'd call luxury; I can't see it getting much worse. I'm in."

"All right then," says Eren, excitement flickering through his green eyes, "the four of us then. We're going to give those titans hell!"


	2. The 104th Cadet Corps Part 1

"Allow me to introduce myself! I am commandant Keith Shadis and you will grow to hate me! Your training is gonna be a ride through hell! If I do my job right this place will be giving you nightmares every night for the rest of your lives!" he bellows. 'Not the most charming man ever I suppose, though that's not really part of his job.' I won't deny that I tune out the rest of his rant, I've always been good at that sort of thing, ever since I can remember. I can just, not hear anymore. Of course I'm not stupid enough not to pay attention, as Shadis begins moving from cadet to cadet.

'Breaking us down to build us back up,' I muse, 'I suppose that's important, can't say I'm looking forward to my turn.' I compile a mental list of names as he goes down the line: Thomas, Mina, Samuel, Jacob, Leon, Andrew, Phillip, James-'dam it I'll never remember even half of these'-Sarah, Alfred, Hanns, Jean. 'Oh boy, here we go.'

"So, just who are you, you little runt?"

"Matthias Quinn from Shiganshina sir!"

"Oh really? That city must have had a habit of producing skinny runts! So why are you here daffodil?!"

"To join those standing between humanity and its destruction, sir!"

"That's good! I'll be interested to see if you can avoid being blown away on a breeze first!"

I let out a slight sigh as he moves onto the next unfortunate, a tall dark haired guy called Marco. 'Well, that could have been worse. Not sure I feel broken down, but I won't deny that I'm a little shaken.' I let mind start tunning everything out except the names, but the pattern breaks all of a sudden and I look over apprehensively.

A dark haired girl looks she's, eating? The Commandant doesn't seem particularly thrilled about it. "I'll give you a half! I'll have you running until you're within half a step of your life Cadet! Move it, now!" The girl-Sasha I'm pretty sure it was-stands still for a moment, but then starts moving away from the line. "I said move it Cadet! I expect you to be running, do you understand me?!"

The commotion lasts a few moments more, and then the list starts up again: Phoebe, Ivan, Christa, and over two hundred others. I heave a sigh of relief when the parade is finally dismissed and we head for the mess hall. Some people seem to have been really affected by the experience, their hands shaking along with occasional false step. 'If they can't handle the Commandant, how on earth can they possibly expect the go head-to-head with a titan?'

The hall is pretty standard; a large wooden building with lots of benches inside. Nowhere looks particularly comfortable, so I look around for my friends. There's a lot of new faces around, most of them not much older than myself, I'd say with a few exceptions that most are between the ages of 12 and 14, though there are a few older ones here and there. I catch myself smiling, as I realise that most of them here look very different to the faces I've gotten used to seeing over the past year. Their eyes aren't hollow, and their skin isn't white. There are a few who carry the same look; the look of someone who's seen hell. I try to see how many I can recognise from the names listed earlier.

That one over there with the blonde hair sitting on her own, pretty sure her name was Annie Leonhart. That tall one was called Reiner Braun, and that guy over there with the sandy hair was called Jean Kirstein, the guy that wanted to join the Military Police. I'd never really let the thought of the MP's enter my head really, I assumed that the only real option for me was the Garrison or the Scouts. I won't deny that the Scouts doesn't appeal to me, and to be honest, I'm not sure how much use I'd be there. Anyway, the Police isn't a practical target, only the top ten get in there, and with the number of cadets it doesn't seem likely that I'd make it.

I slip past a boy of about my age with raven hair, but before I can move on to the next table he catches my arm. Startled I whirl around. "Oh sorry," he says, "my name's Cameron. I was just curious, earlier you said you from Shiganshina?"

"Yeah, I lived there for about eight months."

"But, you were there when, you know?"

"Yes, yes I was there."

Cameron's eyes widen. "The Colossal Titan, did you see him?"

"I'm pretty sure everyone in the city saw him. He stuck his head over the top of the wall before he kicked in the gate."

"Wow," Cameron stares over my shoulder for a few moments, before turning back to me. "Did you see the Armoured Titan as well?"

"The what?"

"The Armoured Titan. The one that broke through Wall Maria."

"Oh, I hadn't heard it called that. Yeah, I saw that one as well. He was shrouded in clouds of dust and steam though, so all I really saw was his outline."

"But still. What was it like, being there?"

"Terrifying," I reply simply. That's a fair summary I should think; it's not like it was fun or exciting.

"That's all?" he asks, clearly a little disappointed.

"Sorry if that didn't live up to your expectations but there's not much else to say," I shrug. "Everyone was panicking and running, it all happened pretty fast. The one thing I remember though-besides the fear-is the, the smell."

"The smell?" he asks, clearly surprised.

"Yes. Some of the buildings were on fire from broken lamps and things; the smell of smoke was all mingled in with, with the smell of blood."

I must have made some kind of face, because Cameron looked as if he'd done something wrong. "Hey, sorry if I brought up some unpleasant memories. I was just curious, you know?"

"Don't worry about it. If I can't get past the memories, I suppose I really shouldn't be here should I?"

"I, I didn't really think of it like that. Hey, I forgot to ask, what's your name?"

"Matthias," I reply, before heading towards the other side of the room.

I suppose most people must have been curious about Shiganshina, because Cameron was only the first of many. The main thing everyone wanted hear about was the Colossal and Armoured Titans, and after awhile the story got pretty boring to tell. I couldn't resist trying to frighten people a bit, so I often added silly, overtly gory parts to my story. Not that such things hadn't taken place, I just didn't see them. Of course some people called me on my crap, and I had to admit to those parts I'd made up. Still people kept asking questions, finally I had to just start asking people to leave me alone and ask someone I'd already told.

Finally I spot Armin over in one of the corners with another group of people huddled around him. 'More people asking about Shiganshina,' I suppose. 'Not that Armin's the best person to ask, he didn't see any of the regular titans. I guess he saw enough to satisfy the most rudimentary questions though.'

"Hey Armin!" I call out to him. He looks over the shoulder of one of his listeners, the evident relief on his face almost making me smile.

"Hey, Matthias. Can you guys excuse me please?" He quickly slips out from the corner and the two of us make a b-line for the doors.

When we find ourselves outside Armin heaves a huge sigh of relief. I grin. "Why is it all anyone wants to talk about is Shiganshina?"

"I suppose it's only natural. After a few thousand times they should lose interest."

"I've told my story ten thousand times already."

I shake my head. "Have you seen Eren and Mikasa around anywhere."

Armin shrugs, "no, I keep getting bogged down by people wanting to hear stories."

"Same," I look out at the parade ground in silence for a few moments. The girl Sasha is still running laps around it, even though the sun is beginning to go down.

"The Commandant wasn't kidding about making her run to with a half step of her life was he?" says a voice from behind me. I turn and see Eren.

"Personally, I'm amazed he didn't kill her," I reply.

"Hah! It looked like he was going to!" calls out one of the other people on the deck. He's about my age I'd say, his hair trimmed incredibly short, so he almost looks bald.

"I'm not sure that's all that funny Connie," cautions the taller dark haired boy, Marco I think. The one the Commandant called an idealistic fool. "Some people might die during training."

"No need to be a wet blanket man!" he responds.

"Hey," says Eren, his gaze shifting up to the path down into the camp, "what's that?"

I follow his gaze to where a wagon is moving up the path. Several people are crouched in the back, looking down at their feet. "Dropouts?" I ask, stunned. "It's only the end of the first day and people are already choosing the plough over the sword?"

"I guess that's the way it is; if you can't handle the pressure, you've got to leave," says Eren. "Seems strange though; I can't believe anyone would rather pull plants than fight."

"Hey," says Marco, "you're Eren right? Where did you say you were from again?"

"Same as Armin and Matthias," says Eren, pointing a thumb at each of us, "from Shiganshina."

"So, you were there that day?" asks Marco, stunned.

'Oh boy,' I think, sighing inwardly, 'here we go again.'

I idly fiddle with a spoon, spinning it between my finger and thumb as Eren tells his story for what feels like the thousandth time, and I can tell that's how many times it feels like for him too. At least twenty people crowd around Eren's table, their dinner forgotten in their excitement to hear about 'the big guy'. The strange thing is that, while for most people the Colossal Titan is the biggest deal, for me at least, the Armoured Titan seems far more alarming. The big problem for the Colossal Titan is that there's no way for him to get over the walls, since he's too big to fit through the gate, but not big enough to get over the walls. The Armoured one however, was only around 15m tall, and could easily make his way through as many gates as he pleases. Still, the Colossal was a lot more spectacular, and I guess that's what appeals.

I've been eyeing the rest of the cadets all evening; I haven't been around so many people for so long before, I guess it must just be nerves. Still, I've overheard some interesting conversations. Along with some less interesting ones I'll admit. The big time goal for most people here seems to be the Military Police and the safety of the interior. I'm not sure if that makes them cowards, stupid or both. "The interior is a death trap," Armin says, and I agree with him. If Wall Rose falls the inhabitants of Wall Sina aren't likely to survive for very long due to the massive flood of refugees. Civil war seems likely, and the last few humans left will be easy prey for the Titans. A few like Marco seem to want to join the Police for good reasons, but I'm not sure how many are sincere, and even fewer are likely to have any real shot at actually getting into the top ten.

Some of the Cadets seem nice enough, Marco being a very good example. But there's also Peter, Samuel and Hogan; they all seem okay. But really they also seem a bit timid to be soldiers, so how long they'll hang around remains to be seen. I nibble on the end of a piece of bread distractedly; the rush of the experience is having an effect on my appetite. I'd always heard about the soldiers, ever since I was small, but I never really considered becoming one. The only times I gave it a passing thought I would have put myself in with the Garrison Regiment, not the Scouts. The idea of the joining the Survey Corps was-and still is-terrifying. But now it seems like for the first time since the coming of the Titans, it really is necessary. Hiding won't achieve anything, not with titans around who can bring down the gates. The only way to survive now is to fight.

The sound of someone getting up suddenly jolts me out of my thoughts. It's Eren. "Are you trying to pick a fight?" he asks Jean, who's looking at him from a table opposite. Evidently he said something that pissed Eren off. Not the most difficult task in the world I suppose.

"All right," says Jean, rising to his feet and striding over to Eren. He's a few inches taller, but from his clothes and bearing, I'd say he's not really been one for fist fights all that much. Suddenly the bell rings, sounding the hour. This seems to call Jean to his senses and he sighs. "Look, sorry for calling you names and dismissing your choice of carrier," he says, offering his hand. "Put it there kid, what do you say?"

Eren hesitates for a moment, then nods. "Yeah, I'm sorry too," he says, briefly taking Jean's offered hand before leaving the room.

Armin looks at me from over the table questioningly. I just shrug, "I wasn't listening until the end."

"Neither was I," he says. "Do you think we ought to follow him?"

"What are we, his bodyguards? He's Eren, he'll be fine."

"I suppose your right. Hey, what's happened to Jean?"

I look over to see Jean looking red and flustered, his composure gone in the matter of an instant. Confused I follow his gaze, but it doesn't seem to lead anywhere, just the doorway. I lean over to peer out the door to see who just left. No one, just Mikasa and Eren, that's weird, I wonder what's wrong with him. Jean suddenly seems to shake himself and hurries out the door.

"Hey," I say suddenly, "you don't think he's going after Eren do you?"

"What? Why? They just made up didn't they?"

"Well yeah, but no else has gone outside recently. How else do you explain the red look on his face?"

"Come on then, we'd better go see what's happening."

We both get up hurriedly and head out the door onto the porch. Jean doesn't seem to be doing anything, just starring out onto the parade ground. "Hey Jean," I ask, "what's the matter?"

"Nothing," he replies, his voice flat. "It's just that some people aren't worth trusting." He turns and walks back inside, whipping his right hand on the door post, as if trying to get off some kind of slime.

"Is he crazy or something?" I ask myself out loud.

"Not sure that's what I would call it," says Armin. I'm surprised to see that he's smiling, not something I've seen in a while.

"What do you mean?"

"Think about it. Jean was perfectly fine when Eren was walking out, but he went all funny shortly after. Now who left shortly after Eren?"

"Well, Mikasa did. Wait a minute, you don't think?"

"I'm afraid I do," says Armin, trying not to laugh.

"You've got to be joking," I splutter, trying not to laugh myself now. And then I do laugh. 'I haven't laughed in nearly three years. I'll have to remember to thank Jean at some point.'

Armin's smile slowly fades to a thoughtful look. "You know, I can't remember the last time I laughed."

"I can," I reply, a slight frown twitching over my face briefly. "It was a few days before my father left. He was reading a story to me, like he usually did of an evening. He liked to put on silly voices for the characters. One of them said something funny and I laughed. At the time I didn't understand why, but that made him sad. I guess he'd already decided he was leaving at that point."

I look up and see that I've killed Armin's good mood. "Sorry about that, I shouldn't be such a downer right now."

"No, it's fine. I understand."

"Thanks." I look out over the parade ground, and something catches my eye. "Hey, she's still running."

"Wait what?"

"Look, Sasha's still out there."

Running is not really a word to describe Sasha's movements by this point. She's dragging her feet every step, and looks like she might be about to pass out. I'd figured that she would have been allowed to quit it by now, but I guess the Commandant really wanted to drill the state of things into her head. "Do you think we should do something?" I ask.

"It's her punishment for stealing food and eating on parade," replies Armin. "An army needs discipline I suppose, and the most effective way to get that is through punishment."

"You're right. All the same, it doesn't sit that well with me."

"Me neither. There's nothing we can do though; it's her own fault. Let's go back in and finish dinner."

"Yeah, okay," I agree, but personally I'm not so sure. I know Armin's right, and Sasha was being a total idiot, but still.

About an hour later, pretty much everyone has turned in of their own accord, no orders necessary. Everyone else is asleep in their bunks, but curious I look out the window, and see that Sasha appears to have collapsed in a heap outside. After thinking it over for a few moments, I decide I should probably go out and help her over to the women's barracks, but before I can leave the window, I see a small figure slip out of the shadows and head towards Sasha. 'Looks like someone else had the same idea. I guess I'm not the only one who feel sorry for her. I wonder who it is. Must be one of the girls; no one's left our barracks.'

The girl hurries over and gives something to Sasha; I suppose its food since she immediately begins tearing at it with her teeth. Can't blame her, she hasn't eaten since before midday, and she's been running non-stop since then. I desperately strain my eyes to try and see who it is that's helping her. There, her face turns so that the moonlight strikes across it. I don't recognise her, but part of me wishes I did. Whoever the girl is she's very beautiful, with blonde hair and sparkling blue eyes. I shake myself, turning away from the window.

'So long as no one saw her, I'm not about to rat her out.' I slip as quietly as I can under a blanket on a bottom bunk. I'm tired, but I lie awake for a while, feeling rather strange inside. Whilst I can't really understand his personal choice, I begin to understand Jean's reaction earlier. Eventually I drift off, but the girl's face is so impressed on my mind, that it manages to weave its way into my dreams, and I manage to sleep without nightmares of death for the first time I can remember.


	3. The 104th Cadet Corps Part 2

The sky is bright, the sun is warm and for once I didn't wake up with the taste of blood in my mouth. Despite the importance of the test we're about to face, I can't help but feel cheerful. It's like I'm starting a new part of my life; I can get away from all the problems of the past. Assuming I can pass this test that is.

Sets of four wooden poles hold up pairs of cables. At each set we form lines, having already been dressed in the combat harness. The belts are little uncomfortable at first, but as I move around more they start to feel better. Somehow I end up only fourth from the front in our line. The first guy steps up and one of the trainers attaches his harness to the cables. Slowly, one of them hoists him up off the ground with a crank handle. The cadet begins to wobble as soon as his feet are off the ground, swaying in the air, slightly forwards, slightly backwards, his concentration evident. They leave him up there for about two minutes, then lower him.

The next cadet manages pretty well, swinging slightly, but holding his balance. The third guy steps up, but even before he's been hoisted half of the distance, he sways backwards, over adjusts forwards and teeters on the edge for a second, before pitching forwards. He hangs upside down, teeth clenched in frustration. He struggles about, but it's already too late for him to right himself. The trainers unhook him, and he walks away from the group, kicking a stone in frustration.

'Oh boy,' I think, as I step up to the rig. 'Just stay calm,' I tell myself, 'panicking will only make your balance worse.' There's a click as I'm hooked on, and slowly I begin to rise from the ground. Any second I expect to swing forwards or backwards, but nothing happens. Very carefully I look around; just to be sure I'm really up. Everything seems attached normally, and my feet are definitely off the ground. Curious, I try moving around a little. I swing the whole thing forwards, then backwards, carefully adjusting my position to match. I then push a bit harder, and swing faster. I find myself smiling; this is actually kind of fun. I try changing my stance so my posture feels more like I'm sitting. I feel perfectly secure. It's so strange; part of me just knows what to do, so it does it.

"Hey," says one of the trainers, "we've got a talented one here." I grin. I've never really been particularly good at something before. "All right kid, hop on down from there. No time for showing off."

They lower me back to the ground and unhook me. It almost feels wrong to have hard ground under my feet again. I walk away from the testing rigs to stand to the side of the lines so I can watch my friends. I hope they can all manage this as easily as I can.

About two thirds of the cadets manage to pass the test. Most wobble a bit but they keep their balance. A few seem to be able to just hang there like me, without really trying all that hard, and to be honest I'm not surprised Mikasa's one of those. Armin shakes slightly, but seems to be genuinely surprised when he manages to hold his pose just fine. The only one left is Eren, and I'm sure he'll be fine.

A few minutes later and I wonder if my optimism jinxed things. I can't help but cringe at the sight of Eren hanging upside down, legs kicking in the air. The other cadets seem to think it's hilarious. "He was talking big about murdering all of the Titans last night," says someone, "not so big now is he?"

"Not sure how you're meant to take you're terrifying revenge if you can't sit up straight Yeager."

"What's the matter down there?"

"This is just plain sad. Clear case of pride before a fall."

"Hey Eren, do you hear the fields calling?"

Eren doesn't even react to the taunt. He's just hanging there staring into space. There's a look of shock in his eyes, like he can't believe this is happening. I don't blame him; I'm just as surprised as he is. Eren never showed a tendency for clumsiness or a lack of personal balance, and surely he should be able to hold his position just through concentrating. It seems not however. 'Dam it. Eren was the one who put the idea of joining the Military in my head in the first place. I barely even want to be here, but this was his dream ever since he was small; it just doesn't seem fair.' Frustrated as I might be there's nothing I can do about it, as Eren is turned right side up, lowered, unhooked and sent away.

He looks defeated, demoralised. So much for a good day. I hurry over, Mikasa and Armin not far behind. None of us knows what to say to him though. "I, I just don't get it," Eren says, his voice uncharacteristically slow. "What did I do wrong?" He looks at us desperately, "come on guys, what am I supposed to do? Help me out here."

"I don't think there really is a particular way to do it; you just kind of do it," I reply lamely.

"That's not totally true," Armin says hopefully. "Your stance looked a bit too tight; you need to loosen yourself up a bit."

"It isn't over yet," adds Mikasa, "you still have a second attempt tomorrow."

Eren puts a hand to his head, then nods. "Right, it isn't over yet. I'll beat this."

"We can ask around," I suggest. "There were plenty of others who were good at it; maybe they can give you some advice."

"Right," says Armin, "this isn't over yet."

I look back at the testing rigs, where a fresh set of cadets are tilting themselves back and forth to stay upright. Several of the spectators are still looking at us, and I notice one of them shake his head and turn away with a sigh. I grit my teeth, 'Eren can do this. He will do this.' My eyes flick over the cadets currently testing, and freeze on the one closest. It's the girl from last night, the one who helped Sasha.

She tilts herself forwards and backwards, keeping herself loose. Somehow, seeing her success helps to cheer me up despite Eren's failure. 'What's wrong with me? I don't even know her name yet I feel happy about her success?'

"Go Krista!" cries one of the spectators, and the girl's face turns slightly red with embarrassment.

'So, Krista. Well, at least I know her name now.'

"Hey Matthias!" calls out Armin, "are you coming?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming." With a last quick look over my shoulder, I follow the others back to the barracks.

The rest of the morning goes past in a distracted way. Even though he failed the initial test, Eren-along with everyone else who didn't give up on the first try-attended a theoretical lesson on the Three Dimensional Mobility Gear. The basic concept is that grapple tipped cables are fired out of a chamber by the release of compressed gas. The gear is controlled from a pair of handles which not only provide the triggers and switches to direct the gear, but also double up as hilts for the blades that soldiers carry into battle. I'm not really sure how 3D Gear will really solve the problem of the Titan's invulnerability, but I suppose they wouldn't be issuing us with it if it didn't work somehow.

There was a little practice in firing grapples from the waist at a target, at which I'm pleased to say I also excel. The others also managed it fairly well, but I was the most accurate out of all four of us. Perhaps I've finally found something in which I can specialise. Eren's grim mood hasn't helped to lighten the atmosphere all that much though.

The lunch bell sounds and all the cadets flock towards the mess hall. Success on the aptitude rig is the favourite topic of the day. People are bragging to each other about their performances, while others desperately try to glean some advice from those who were able to pass it. Looks like Eren will be competing for attention. I even have one or two people come over and ask me how I was able to manage, but all I can tell them is the same useless piece of advice that everyone else tells them. "You've just got to concentrate and try to stay loose." Everyone who asks goes away disappointed.

The mess hall seems to have just as many people in it before, but I know for a fact it doesn't. At least thirty cadets have already chosen the fields over the Military. After tomorrow, I'd say around fifty more will be sent away involuntarily. I spot Krista over towards the back of the room, but something inside me turns upside down at the thought of approaching her, so I decide to stick with my friends for now. 'This is just so weird. What the hell is wrong with me?'

Eren fidgets restlessly at the table, picking at his food. "Don't play with it, just eat it," scolds Mikasa. Eren scowls at her, but he does actually start eating his food.

After a few minutes however, he slams his fist down on the table in frustration. "I can't just sit here dam it!" he fumes. "I have to do something about this."

"You're not going to accomplish anything right now," I say dryly. "Just wait until after lunch. We've got some free time; you can try again then. For now, just sit down."

"But, but," Eren splutters, his eyes flicking back and forth. He hisses in frustration and sinks down into his seat. "It's just, if I get shipped out I'm not sure how I'll take it. I don't know what I'll do."

No one replies, I don't think any of us can think of what to say to him. I for one don't really know what I'd do either. I mean, I suppose I'd have no choice but to keep going on with my life, but I feel like it would purposeless; I'd just be another helpless victim waiting for my doom to come and devour me. I don't want Eren to have to be put in that position. I can't help but worry that he might do something stupid in an effort to change that. Eren isn't someone who'd willingly put his fate in the hands of people he doesn't known.

After lunch is over-which with Eren feels like an eternity later-we head out to the test rigs, which are still set up, and will remain so until tomorrow's tests are complete. Armin takes the winch as I hook Eren into the cables. "Remember," cautions Armin, "keep yourself loose and try to distribute your weight evenly over your waist and legs."

"Right, loose but balanced," nods Eren. "Let's give it a shot."

Slowly Armin begins to winch Eren up. Just as Eren's feet leave the ground, I realise we've forgotten something; one of us is supposed to steady Eren until he reaches a certain height. Almost immediately Eren leans too far forwards, spinning towards the ground and smashing his head against the dirt. The ground is deliberately chosen to be softer in this area, but the impact must still have been pretty hard. Armin quickly lowers Eren the few turns down and Mikasa rushes forwards, practically tearing Eren out of the harness.

I slip Eren's left arm over my shoulder, while Mikasa supports him on the other side. Armin tears off to fetch some help as Mikasa and I begin to pretty much drag Eren over to the small medical hut. Eren moans quietly, but doesn't say anything. Thankfully his head doesn't seem to be bleeding, so hopefully there won't be any lasting effects. I catch Mikasa's eye and give her a reassuring nod in an effort to calm her down. It doesn't make all that much difference.

After we drop off Eren to be tended to, Armin and I head outside again. "What are we going to do?" I ask.

Armin sits down on the veranda and stares at the dirt. "I really don't know. He just can't seem to stay balanced; he falls forwards as soon as he's on his own support. I can't understand it."

"Neither can I. At the least he should be able to hold for a few moments. Maybe he's trying so hard it makes him fail."

"That could be it. Even so it doesn't add up; greater concentration should improve his performance not make it worse."

We both sit still for a few minutes, pondering the situation. "What do you think he'll do if he gets sent off to the fields?" I ask eventually.

Armin bites his lip, "I really don't know. That's what worries me; he's likely to do something desperate."

"You don't think he'd try going out there on his own do you?"

"I honestly don't know. Eren's desperate for this and he can't think of an alternative. He might do anything."

"Dam it! This doesn't feel right." I kick one of the posts in frustration. "Doesn't Eren deserve this at least after everything he's had to deal with?"

"I suppose that confirms it then huh? If there's such a thing as fate, it's certainly cruel."

I slump down to my haunches, staring at the sun, which is still high enough to keep the sky around it blue. My thoughts start wandering. The last two days have been something of a whirlwind for me already. I've enlisted into the military, met as many people as I've known in my whole life in a single place, found a skill at which I seem to excel, taken an interest in a girl and now I may be about to lose one of my friends because he couldn't pass a test. My thoughts begin backtracking, deliberately skipping over the massacre of Shiganshina-I've relieved that enough times-and stopping in my early childhood.

When we lived in a small village within the interior of Wall Maria called Rieskrippe. I was only six years old, so my memories are sparse. Most of them centre around a favourite spot I had; a small pine tree by the river. I never had any real friends that I can remember, so I played alone. I'd pretend to be a brave warrior who fights and slays a monster of some kind. A dragon, a troll, a giant lion or bear, but of course most commonly: a giant. My mom says she worried about me back then. Playing games that featured the Titan's was looked down upon by most people, but I didn't care. I imagined that one day I'd grow up and save everyone from them.

As I got a little older though, the idea went stale. I started thinking about other things I could do when I grew up. I've wanted to be an inventor, an explorer and engineer among other things. Unfortunately an explorer was an even worse goal to have than a Titan killer, and my mother and father quickly told me never to mention it. After exploring several strange parts of the woods near the village, I let the idea go on my own.

I sometimes wonder that my mother ever allowed me to play outside at all after my accident. I've been told it happened when I was five. I fell out of a tree and hit my head on a rock. I suppose I must have bled profusely, but the main thing was that I lost my memories. As a result, it sometimes feels like I was born at the age of six, though at times I think I can remember a few things from earlier in my life. I remember being hugged by my mom, and I can remember what I think is a house. There's also a sharp pain that comes up sometimes, which must be me hitting the ground. It's very strange not remember about half of one's life, but I manage. "It's the here and now that matters," my father used to say. "What happened before in life is of little importance compared to what you do now." He was full of wise sayings like that.

And then he disappeared one day. Mom still wears her ring, despite the fact that it's been four years now. I don't think he's ever coming back. Perhaps he's dead, or caught up in some sort of illegal dealing that he can't get out of. Or maybe he was just some sort of coward. I don't like the last option, but it does seem the most likely.

'Why do I have to think about him at a time like this? The situation is bad enough as it is without shoving that crap on top of it.' "Hey, Armin," I ask.

"What?"

"Do you know that girl Krista, the one with the blonde hair?"

"I think so. What about her?"

"I, well, nothing."

"Oh. Okay. If you don't trust me with it that's fine."

"No, that's not it. I think I'd have to say I trust you more than any other person I know right now. I'm just not quite sure how I can approach this."

"You want me to try approaching it for you?"

"Depends, what do you think the issue is?"

"You're attracted to her right?" I nod slowly. "So, just go talk to her."

"But, I feel all strange and uncomfortable when I think about it; as if I'm going to throw up."

Armin smiles at that "form the stories I've read, I'm pretty sure that's normal. You just have to calm down and do it."

"Aaaaah! What the hell? This is so annoying; Eren's in danger of being thrown out, and all I can think about is how I'm supposed to talk to a girl."

"As I see it, if you can think about something else it means you're less worried. If we can stay calm Eren should feel more confident."

That evening, Eren is even more of a laughing stock since his accident. Asking other people for advice hasn't amounted to anything. Eren's confidence the previous day seems to make his failure today such fine comedy that no one even considers potentially bringing it to an end. Eren's desperation is so great that he even tries asking Jean for help. His only response is to laugh and ask how exactly Eren has managed to screw up every possible way besides asphyxiating himself.

Eren's earlier frustration has changed to depression. "How the hell am I supposed to kill titans if I can't even stand up straight?" He asks.

Mikasa puts her finger tips together and looks at him, "I think it might be time to let that dream die Eren."

"What are you saying? Do you think I should go work in the fields?"

"I'm saying that what you want right now doesn't matter. Whether or not you're fit to be a soldier isn't up to you."

Eren clenches his fist and stands up. "Like I care. I'm not about to let this opportunity slip away, just because of some dumb balancing act." He walks away from the table and heads for the door. Armin hesitates for a few moments, then follows him.

"Matthias," Mikasa says, "do you think Eren hates me?"

"What? Why on earth would you think that?"

"He always gets angry with me and never listens to anything I say. He's always pushing me away as if he doesn't want me in his life."

I shake my head, "that's what you think? Mikasa, you're the only family he has left."

"Then why does he act like he hates me?!"

"Look, I'm not Eren, so I don't know what's going through his head, but if you ask me, it's because you're trying too hard to take care of him. You remind him of his mom."

She stares at the table silently. "I never thought of it like that before. But I'm not about to just leave him to get himself killed."

"You want him to get kicked out?"

"He would be safer if he wasn't here."

"No, he wouldn't. You know Eren; he'd never be satisfied with field work, odds are he'd end up getting himself into an even worse situation. At least in the Scout Regiment he'd be taking the titans on with proper training and equipment."

"I'm not going to just let him throw away his life!"

"None of us wants that, but you've got to try and look at this from his point of view. Just try talking with him about it."

Mikasa sighs, "maybe. It all depends on whether or not he can manage tomorrow really."

"You'll leave with him if a fails the test." It isn't a question.

She nods, "wherever he goes, I go too."

"I'd suggest not telling him that." I stand up, and leave Mikasa alone with her thoughts.

Once I get outside, I wonder if I was a bit too cold. After all, Mikasa and I may not see eye-to-eye, but she's just worried about Eren's safety like Armin and I am. I can't quite call the two of us friends, she's always had a bit of an unpleasant aura that I've never been comfortable with. Maybe these next three years are the time to change that, I hear that there's a natural bond that forms between soldiers during training and combat. That's assuming she doesn't leave tomorrow. And what about Armin? Is he likely to stay if both Mikasa and Eren leave? Am I likely to stay? Just this morning it felt like the world was new, but now that world hinges entirely on Eren's success or failure.

Everything hinges on tomorrow.

He swings slightly forwards, then slightly backwards, his eyes blazing with concentration and effort. 'He's doing it, he's doing it!' Eren's face is screwed up tightly and sweat runs down his forehead in rather abnormal amounts, but he's holding his balance. Some people are cheering; that's certainly a change in atmosphere. Armin told me that he and Eren had gone out last night with Reiner and Bertolt in an effort to bring Eren back up to speed on the 3D Gear. It seems to have payed off. Suddenly though, as if shoved from behind, Eren topples forwards, and hangs with his feet in the air. There a huge number of groans of disappointment from the crowd, but I can't even manage that. Eren failed; it's over.

The Commandant steps forwards and Eren stares up at him desperately. "Please, let me try again. I know I can get this!"

Shadis looks at him for a moment, then fixes his gaze on Thomas, who was working the crank. "Mr. Wagner, please exchange belts with Mr. Yeager."

People stare in confusion as Eren is unhooked and Thomas hands Eren his belt. Eren is hooked back into the harness, and hauled up. I can see the change in his eyes, instead of intense concentration, there's a look of surprise, then relief, then excitement. "A defective harness," explains the Commandant, "I'm going to have to pay a visit to the supply depot and crack a few skulls."

Everything becomes suddenly clear; of course Eren shouldn't have toppled over instantly, of course he shouldn't have had any real trouble holding his balance. And that explains why he seemed to be shoved out of his place just now. The harness itself was at fault. I exchange looks with Armin and his eyes are as bright with relief as mine are. We're going to be soldiers; this new life has only just begun!


	4. The 104th Cadet Corps Part 3

Chapter 4: The 104th Cadet Corps Part 3: Krista

"So, to review, what is the only fatal weak spot on a titan?" asks the lecturer.

Armin's hand goes up first. "Someone else please Mr. Arlert." I raise my hand as he lowers his. The lecturer sighs. "Is there anyone here prepared to answer besides Arlert and Quinn?" The following silence draws out a number of smiles, but eventually Jean raises his hand. "Yes, thank you Mr. Kirstein."

"The back of the neck sir, a space roughly 1m long and 10cm across," says Jean.

"Right, which on most titans encompasses an area within the back of the head to the nape of the neck. Now, if a titan's neck is inaccessible for any reason, what is the usual secondary method of attack?"

This time Eren's hand goes up, "cutting the Achilles tendons or some point along the spinal column, sir," he answers when the lecturer gives him a nod.

"Very good. It's an important aspect of your theoretical training that you learn the positioning of the various tendons and what it is that they support. Cutting the right one at the right time can mean the difference between life and death." The sound of the bell tolling out the hour draws numerous heads up from the hands they've been resting on. Several cadets exchange glances but no one gets up. "Yes, you can go now," says the lecturer with a slight smile. Almost immediately the entire class is on its feet and heading for the door.

"I always wanted to go to a proper school," says Armin as we walk out, "like one of the ones in the interior. I guess this is as good as it's going to get."

"Personally, I'm finding it really interesting," I reply. "Don't think the same thing can be said for most the class though."

Armin grins, "no, half of them looked like they were asleep during that last part."

"Hey, a soldier needs to conserve energy," I say, imitating Connie's response when the lecturer had caught him napping.

We both laugh, and emerge into the open air. We brush past the second class who are heading into the building we've just left. They've come from ODM training, and most don't look too excited about their upcoming theoretical lesson. Armin isn't particularly excited about leaving it. While I found the theory class interesting, I'm also looking forward to any opportunity to get to practice with the 3D Gear. In our last session we were finally allowed to move from a stationary position and to start trying to swing from a series of padded wooden poles erected over a sand pit. Not everyone was able to get past the first few, but those that did were able to make it most of the way. I was certainly gratified to find that while I didn't get quite the farthest-Mikasa beat me by two poles-I was defiantly the fastest.

In fact, the Commandant told me that if I didn't want to run myself straight into one of the poles I'd have to slow down. However, I seemed to manage just fine, only dropping off when one of my grapples missed and I fell onto the sand. I can't wait to try again.

Today however, we didn't get to do very much manoeuvring at all and instead concentrated on making cuts with our blades. We had to fly past four poles before making a cut into a large cloth bundle affixed to another pole. About two thirds of the class reached the target, but none of us were able to get a clean cut, though Mikasa and Jean both got their blades into it, they only succeeded in sending a few shreds of fabric flying into the air.

"That," says the Commandant "is an object lesson. Despite how easy trained professionals may make it look, pulling off an effective cut is extremely difficult. However difficult it is though, trust me when I tell you that in the field, a titan will rarely give you a second chance at defeating him."

After that, we practiced the various cutting techniques. While I can see the importance in holding the blade properly, the more childish part of me just wants to practice with the 3D Gear. Armin does reasonably well at cutting while standing on the ground, but as he says it's just going through the motions, it's not going to be the same when you're actually mobile. Eren seems to be taking to things with a lot of enthusiasm, if not an outstanding amount of skill. He swings a little wildly, but the depth of his cuts is good.

Also, since she's been assigned to the same class as us, I have been watching how Krista's been performing. She seems a little timid, but there's also a level of determination in her eyes. She manages the 3D Gear with some level of competency, but during the cutting exercise she ended up not only missing the target but falling face first into the sand. To my extensive surprise I had to concentrate on the tips of my boots to stick to my place in line when that happened. She seems to be friendly to everyone, always smiling and helping people out with whatever needs doing.

Twice now I've tried to open a conversation with her, but my nerve always fails me at the last second. I try to concentrate on other things most of the time, with varying levels of success. I decided to try and bring Eren into the situation yesterday, and he thinks it's hilarious. He agrees with Armin though; that I should just try talking to her, and see if I can get to know her a bit as a starting point. But I don't know, is it really such a good idea? What if she doesn't like me? I mean, I'm not exactly a master of social behaviour. "If she doesn't like you, she doesn't like you," said Eren. "It's better that you find that out instead fidgeting all the time. That's starting to get kind of annoying."

The lesson is over, and the class heads back to the barracks for an hour of free time before the evening meal. The sun is still up, but the sky is just starting to change colour from its usual blue, to the deep orange of sunset. "So," Mikasa says to Eren, "it's been two weeks now. Is this dream all you hoped for?"

"I'd say so," replies Eren, grinning. "Each day we learn more about how to kill titans. I almost feel ready to take 'em on right now!"

"Uh, I think that might prove a little difficult," points out Armin, "considering you ran straight into the dummy earlier."

"Hey, I said almost."

Mikasa breaks off and heads for the women's barracks while the three of us head into our own. While one of my four roommates is Eren, I also share with Samuel and Jean. Jean and Eren appear to have already decided not to get along under any circumstances, so there's usually a rather tense atmosphere in the room. The rather limited size of each chamber doesn't help; there's barely room for two people to stand facing each other between the two bunks. There's also only one trunk for personal belongings which all four of us have to share, not that Eren and I have all that many belongings to put in there.

After changing out of our uniforms, Eren and I go outside and meet up with Armin. "So, what plans do you guys have?" I ask.

Eren shrugs, "nothing in particular. I was thinking about practicing on the stationary training rig."

"For a whole hour?"

"I didn't say that, but it's a start. What about you Armin?"

"Mr. Aral said that I might be able to have a look at a few of the books in the officer's library," Armin replied. "So long as I'm careful," he added.

"Hmmm," I wonder. "I don't really have any ideas. I can't really seem to justify doing anything simply for pleasure anymore, it feels like it all ought to have some sort of point to it."

Eren exchanges a quick look with Armin, "you could go and talk to Krista."

"Or," I say hurriedly, "I could go and practice my cutting technique some more. I'm not really sure I quite got the hang of it."

"You were practising it for over an hour," points out Armin.

"A little more practice wouldn't hurt would it?"

"You don't need practice," says Eren, "you need to get on with **this.** "

I sigh. "I'm not getting out of this am I?"

Eren and Armin both shake their heads. "Your nervous energy is getting to me," says Eren. "If you don't go and talk to her I swear I'll go do it for you."

"Ugh! Fine, I'll do it," I concede, holding up my hands in a gesture of surrender. "Where is she anyway?" This proves to be a bit of a setback. There are a various groups of cadets milling around, but Krista doesn't seem to be in any of them. "Where could she have got to? We only got back a few minutes ago."

"She's probably still inside," says Armin. "Just wait awhile."

I walk over to the veranda and sit down, watching the entrance to the women's barracks. Eren stalls for a few moments, but doesn't seem interested in waiting, and heads for the training field. Armin leans against one of the wooden beams, watching the barracks with me. A few different girls come out, but after ten minutes there is still no sign of Krista. I run both hands through my hair-I really need to give it a cut some time-and breathe out slowly. "How much longer could she possibly take?" I ask.

"Maybe she's doing something inside for her free hour," suggest Armin.

"Oh come on!" I cry aloud, throwing up both hands and standing.

"Hey, what's all this about?" asks Reiner. He's just exited the men's barracks and leans with one hand on the veranda rail.

"Matthias is waiting to talk to-

"Armin!" I exclaim.

"Oh, right. Ah, nothing."

Reiner looks between the two of us curiously. "All right, I may not be the brightest guy around but I can tell there's something going on here. Who exactly are waiting for Matty?" Matty is the nick name Reiner gave me a few days after training started. Irritatingly it seems to have caught on, and a lot of people use it now. I'm pretty sure Reiner uses it to annoy me.

I sigh. "I'm waiting to try and talk to Krista."

"What for?"

"Well umm," my voice trails off and I look down at my shoes.

"Ohhh, it's like that is it?" asks Reiner, his face light up by a broad smile. "Well, can't say I blame you. That Krista's a pretty one, and she's really sweet isn't she?"

"Yes."

"As it happens I do know where she is at the moment. She went off towards the stables with a few of the others straight after class."

"The stables? As in, horses?"

"Umm, yeah."

"Oh no," I moan as I put my head in my hands. When I was seven I was almost trampled by a horse that bolted and threw its ridder. Ever since I've been utterly terrified of going anywhere near them. I know it'll be a necessary part of our training to learn to ride, but I'm not keen on the idea. I'm perfectly prepared for that part to come in its own time. Armin quickly fills Reiner in on my phobia, and he laughs.

"Well, that's really gonna be a problem for you isn't it?" he laughs. "Not only is working with horses a required part of our training, but Krista loves horses. I heard her say so."

"Greeeat," I say. 'Should I just drop this now? No. This is actually the ideal opportunity for me. I've heard Krista loved horses, and that she's very well acquainted with them from her child hood. I can turn up and explain my problem to her. Ask her for some help. I kill two birds with one stone like this.' I draw in a deep breath. "All right then. I guess it's too the stables then."

"Hey, mind if I tag along?" asks Reiner. "I'm curious about how this'll turn out. Besides, I haven't ridden in a few years; this would be a good time to get reacquainted."

The stables are set up to adjoin onto a large paddock where the horses are taken out for exercise presumably. There appear to be at least thirty stalls, which would provide mounts for a whole class and leave several spare. A group of about five cadets are in the paddock, with three horses. At the moment Krista appears to be the only one mounted, while the rest are stroking the horses' noses or just standing around talking. One of them-a dark haired boy named Peter-sees us coming. "Hey guys!" he calls out, waving.

"Hi!," responds Reiner, vaulting over the fence into the paddock. I clamber over the fence a little more slowly, while Armin holds on to it tightly as he goes, looking as if he expects to be thrown off.

"What are you guys doing here?" asks Krista.

"I haven't ridden in a while, and Armin and Matty here haven't ridden at all, so we thought we'd come down and get acquainted with the horses," Reiner explains. "Matthias in particular has rather a, unique problem."

I shoot the blonde giant an irritated look. "Oh really," says Krista, dismounting smoothly and coming over. "What problem's that?"

"Well," I say, not quite sure how to explain. "I sort of have, a, uh, phobia of horses."

Krista looks at me stunned, as if I've just told her that drinking water will kill you. "W-why?" she eventually manages to ask.

Reiner has already led Armin over to one of the horses, and seems to be instructing him in something, but every now and again they both glance in my direction. 'Just great,' I fume. "When I was little, there was an accident," I endeavour to explain. "A messenger's horse panicked when it almost stepped on a snake at the side of the road. It threw the ridder off and went straight for me. That resulted in two cracked ribs, a broken leg and something of a um, mistrust?"

Krista looks at me sympathetically, as if I've been deprived of something my whole life. "Sounds like you had an unlucky experience. But don't worry, these horses are very sweet, come on I'll show you." She takes a hold of my sleeve and leads me over to the light brown horse she was just riding. "This is Alvin," she says, taking the horse's bridle and bringing him close. Despite my best efforts I can't stop my breathing from becoming erratic. I know this fear is irrational; there's no reason for this horse to break loose. But I can't seem to shake the feeling that it' watching me. Its eyes seem to be malevolent, and when it stamps one of its hooves I jump back.

"It's fine, it's fine," reassures Krista. She reaches out and takes my hand. "Come on, just put your hand here, on his head. Try to calm your breathing." She gently rests my hand over the horse's head between the eyes. I do my best to breathe slowly, but it's just so difficult. I try concentrating on something besides the immense size of the horse. It feels sort of silky under my hand, smooth and warm. "See, it's fine." Krista's voice, sweet and kind, I lock my thoughts onto that, using it like an anchor to keep myself still. Finally, my breathing slows and I cautiously move my hand around a little, rubbing the horse's head slightly. "There you go. Now here, I'm going to give you the reins in your other hand okay?"

I nod slowly, holding out my hand for them, not taking my eyes off of the horse. A big part of me still doesn't trust the creature, but I'm less worried than I was before. Krista slips the reins into my open right hand. "Now see if you can lead him a few steps. Don't feel rushed; we're taking this slowly all right?"

"Right," I nod. I take my hand away from the horse's head slowly, and wrap the reins around my right hand twice. The horse shakes his head slightly as I remove my hand. I freeze, but then shake my head slightly. 'It's all right, just keep moving.' I take three steps forwards, tugging at the reins slightly. Obediently the horse follows. I smile and look over at Krista. She smiles back and nods encouragingly.

The next twenty minutes leave me feeling exhausted, but satisfied. I never managed to get onto one of the horses, but I certainly feel far less nervous. To make matters even better, Krista suggested that we do the same thing again tomorrow. I'm very excited to be able to talk with her again, and I get the feeling that I may-eventually-even enjoy the company of the horses. Eventually. Mikasa shows a distinct level of curiosity in this afternoon's activities, and Eren seems to think the whole situation is very entertaining. "And you've stopped fidgeting thank god," he adds with a grin.

That evening in the mess hall, Reiner pays me a visit asking about how it went. I tell him that I think everything is going all right. "Thanks for your help Reiner," I say. "I probably never would have found her otherwise."

"Hey, don't worry about it," he replies. "You put on a pretty entertaining performance. If I didn't know better I would have thought you were trying the wrangle a titan, not a horse."

"Oh no, a titan would have been far less terrifying."


	5. Trost Part 1

Chapter 5: Trost Part 1: Not for five years

"The Colossal Titan has reappeared! The Gate of Trost has been breached! All soldiers prepare for battle!"

"This can't be happening, this can't be happening."

"I don't want to die!"

"Why today, why now?"

"It's over isn't it? We're all going to get eaten!"

"Shut up and pull yourself together!"

"We're going to die!"

"Eren, is it true? Has the gate really been destroyed?"

"Yes Matthias it has. I saw it."

"Oh dear god."

I suppose we're getting a little ahead of ourselves here. It's been three years since the four of us joined the Cadets, and I have to say, that despite the Commandant's threats at the start of our training, I'm going to value the memory of those years. I won't deny that it felt like hell at times; having to endure freezing cold in the mountains, running for hours in the rain, riding for the better part of three days. There were an awful lot of struggles to be pushed through, some far harder than others, but I have to say that compared to what I'm about to have to do, those times seem like heaven.

I can remember just yesterday, when the entire 104th Cadet Corps was paraded for what would be the last time as Cadets. The three possible paths were laid before us. The Military Police, which most people wanted to get into in order to secure a safe haven in the interior. The Garrison Regiment, where almost everyone was expected to be assigned. The Scout Regiment, the regiment which I'd already decided I was going to join. I won't deny that I was terrified, even more so after learning just what it would entail from various theory classes. I could tell that most people there had already decided to avoid the Scouts at all costs.

The Parade did grant me some measure of pride however. I was ranked at number 7 in our classes top ten. The main reason for which is certainly my speed and agility on the 3D Manoeuvre Gear. I hope I'm not being immodest by saying that I'm the fastest person in the entire class. My main problem is that my cuts have a tendency to be too shallow, and often inaccurate. Still, it's certainly satisfying to be able to say you're the best at something in your class.

That same evening, Thomas asked Eren which regiment he intended to join. There had been a lot of talking about that particular subject. Most people didn't really believe that Eren would actually join the Scouts, and that when faced with the opportunity open to him in the MP's he would pull out. Of course I knew better. The reactions were pretty much what you would expect.

"Are you insane?"

"Do you want to get eaten?"

"Come on you guys, be honest with us. We won't judge you."

"No really, you can't be serious."

"But you'll die!" Krista exclaimed.

"Not if I can help it," I replied. I sighed and took her hand in mine. "Look, humanity needs to find some way to expand back into Wall Maria. We can't survive this constant over population forever; we need to find some way to reclaim Wall Maria. Besides, I can't leave my friends to go join the Survey Corps on their own."

"Then convince them not to go!"

"You know them better than that. I couldn't convince them to join the MPs or the Garrison. Not anymore than you can convince me."

Krista looked down at the table gloomily. "I don't know if I can join the Scouts, I'm afraid."

"Hey! No one asked you too. Join the Garrison and stay safe."

Her eyes flashed at me with an uncommon intensity, "Don't give me that. If you're going to the Scouts I can't go somewhere else."

I didn't know what to say. Suddenly I could see where she was coming from. When it was my life on the line I felt that was acceptable. I mean, it was my life so it was my responsibility, but I didn't feel so comfortable when someone else, someone I cared about was putting their life on the line. But I couldn't-and still can't-let that feeling sway me; I'm joining the Scouts, and I'm going to help humanity achieve victory.

Eren made rather a spectacular speech not long after that. "Humanity's future lies outside the Walls, I'm gonna clear the way! I'm going to drive them all out, and as long as one of us can say that, we're not done!" The emotional intensity sent him running outside, and hurriedly Armin, Mikasa and I followed.

The night air was cold, and I rubbed my arms in an effort to keep it out. "You're sure about this I suppose?" I ask Eren. "Joining the Scouts I mean."

"Of course. That was the whole point of all this."

"I guess so. I don't know, part of me hoped that for some reason you weren't serious back there." I slumped against the side of a building, and stared up at the night sky. "I suppose the same goes for you two as well?"

"Yeah," agreed Armin. "I don't think I could justify backing down now."

"What?" Eren exclaimed, "come on, you're not a warrior Armin. You're life is with books."

"I know, but I through having other people fight my battles for me."

"It's the Scouts for me as well," said Mikasa.

"Oh come on! You're top of the class; you'd be wasting your opportunity."

"Eren. I am not going to leave you. I made a promise to your mom before she died; I've got your back whether you like it or not, so just deal with it."

Eren scowled. "Well Mom's not here," he mutters. Eren looks over at me after a few moments. "Please tell me you're not joining the Scouts too Matthias."

"I'm afraid I can't do that," I sighed. "It's like you said: Mankind's future is outside of the Walls, and I won't be getting us there from the Garrison or the Interior."

Eren groaned. "Now we're all going to wind up dead."

"Maybe. Maybe not."

We were all silent as we looked up at the night sky. A shooting star ripped through the dark blue velvet of the night, disappearing into the blackness. 'I won't let it be a maybe,' I told myself. 'I'm going to survive. I'm not about to become Titan fodder.'

Now, I'm suddenly not so sure. The atmosphere is only just short of total panic. People are rushing in all different directions, some asking for orders, some trying to find friends and some just trying to think up a way to escape. This is ridiculous; what on earth were the last three years for if not to prepare us for today? Surely they didn't all expect that they'd just get to live the easy life, living of government pay without doing so much as lifting a finger. Trouble is, I'm pretty sure that's exactly what they expected.

"Soldiers, attention!" comes a booming cry. I look up to see Captain Kitts Woerman, our commanding officer. Silence falls over the milling mass over men and women, and slowly they begin to pool towards the central courtyard. Once everyone is standing in orderly ranks, Woerman begins speaking again. His sunken eyes and haggard look are not particularly reassuring. "Now, as you all know by this point, the Colossal Titan has reappeared and has broken the Outer Gate of Trost. It may interest you to know that the advanced team has been whipped out. Yes, it's official: the Titans are in and the Outer Gate is history! Our next greatest threat is the Armoured Titan. If and when he appears, the Inner Gate will also be history!"

'He really doesn't have a way with words does he?' All around me I can hear people talking nervously about what will happen if the Titans breach Wall Rose.

"QUIET!" the Captain screams, and silence returns to the courtyard. "The civilian evacuation is already underway. Our forces will be divided into three parts: the Vanguard composed of the core of the Garrison Troops, the Middle guard composed of the newly graduated cadets lead by the support squad and the Rearguard composed of the elites. Your task is a simple one: defend the wall until the evacuation is complete. Need I remind you that desertion is punishable by death. If it comes to it lay down your lives! Dismissed!"

"Sir!" comes the universal acknowledgement, followed by the loud clack of several hundred soldiers all saluting at once. The orderly ranks disintegrate back into the confused mass of a few minutes ago, but at least this time people seem to be trying to get to certain places. 'All right then, I need to find my squad mates and report for the Middle guard.' My heart is racing faster than it ever has before, even faster than five years ago, because this time I can't run away, I have to fight.

I look around, trying to find Eren, Mina, Thomas and the rest, but I'm slightly disoriented; nothing looks straight. I lean against one of the supporting pillars for a few moments with my hand over my face. 'Just breathe,' I tell myself. 'You're going to be fine. You trained for this.' I stand up straight and look around. There's Thomas and Mina disappearing downstairs into the supply room. I start heading that, but someone catches my arm. It's Krista.

"Matthias," she says, her eyes filled with fear. "I know, we might not both make it through this alive, so there's something I want to tell you first." I want to tell her not to talk like that, but I can't bring myself not to; she's right. "My real name isn't Krista Lenz, it's Historia. Historia Reiss."

"What?" I ask confused. "Why would you be living under a fake name?"

"I don't really have time to explain now. But, I wanted you to know that. Don't tell anybody okay?"

"Don't worry, I won't."

"And Matthias, please don't die." Then stands on her toes and kisses me, before hurrying away.

I stand still for a few moments. The two of us have grown very close over the past three years but, she's never kissed me before. And why on earth would she use a different name? Is she related to someone disreputable, like a criminal or something? 'You can ask her yourself later, after you both survive this. And you are both going to survive this.'

I hurry towards the stairs, pushing past people who are still milling around in confusion. Once on the stairs I meet up with Eren and Nac. "So," Nac says, his voice shaky, "it's really happened then."

"Yeah," replies Eren. "I never really expected to go into battle in our training squad, but I'm glad you guys are going to be with me."

This seems to encourage Nac, who nods and quickens his pace down the stairs. At the bottom we all head to the armoury and don our Omni-Directional Mobility Gear, and stock up on blades. The gas tanks are of course kept empty, and we head out into the main room to get them filled. "Have either of you two seen the others?" Eren asks.

"I saw Mina and Thomas head down here earlier," I reply.

"What about Armin?"

"He's over there," says Nac, pointing to where Armin is crouching next to the gas cylinders.

"All right guys, fill up your tanks and meet up in the courtyard outside."

"Whatever you say squad leader," I reply, with a slightly provoking grin.

"Just get going will you?"

"Okay, okay." I hurry over to a cylinder not currently in use and remove my left gas tank. In a few minutes both my tanks are full, and I head towards the stairs, telling Nac I'll see him up there. When I emerge out into the sunlight again, I can see that there's now more organisation amongst the soldiers. Squads are grouping up. Just as I emerge I see a squad ascend to the roof tops, disappearing from sight. My heart pounds slightly harder when I spot Connie, and realise it's Historia's squad. She's out there now, flying straight towards the jaws of death. I don't like that piece of knowledge at all.

Pushing my concerns for her aside I head over to where Thomas and Mina are already waiting. Only a few seconds behind me come Armin and Eren, with Nac appearing last of all. "Everyone has full gas?" checks Eren. We all nod. "All right then, let's go. We'll rendezvous with the support squad and get our orders from them. Move out!"

There's a whirring and whooshing as six sets of grapples are fired and dig into the stone gutter. With a swish the squad flies through the air and we all make smooth landings. We keep moving at a run, grappling from building to building, trying to run whenever possible so as to conserve gas. We have no idea how long this battle will last, so until we know that we need to move fast, we're going to have to focus on conserving our fuel.

I look around uneasily, expecting to see titans lumbering through the streets even this far in, but there's nothing. Armin catches my wary glances. "Don't worry yet," he says, "the enemy won't have penetrated very far in, just the first few blocks I bet. The Vanguard will probably be engaging soon." I shiver. Even though I know that the odds are that we'll have to fight anyway, I can't help feeling glad that I'm not with the Vanguard.

After a few minutes of flying through over rooftops-which under other circumstances I might enjoy-we meet up with the Support Squad. "Ah right, Squad 34 isn't it?" asks one of them.

"Yes sir!" responds Eren, saluting.

"All right then, for now you're in reserve. I suggest you enjoy that while it lasts."

Eren nods and leads us over to a nearby roof top where we have a clear view of most of Trost. Thomas sits down with a noticeable thud and puts his face in his hands. "Hey, Thomas come on," says Mina. "We'll be fine okay."

Thomas looks up at her with somewhat sunken eyes, "will we?"

"Yes, we will," says Eren adamantly. "We're ready for this; what else were the last three years for but to make us ready for this day?"

"See?" says Mina, putting a hand on Thomas shoulder. "We've got the smartest, the fastest and the scariest guys in the whole Corps. We'll be fine."

"Hey," Eren says, "I know Armin can act a bit weird sometimes but he's not that frightening."

We all laugh.


	6. Trost Part 2

Chapter 6: Trost Part 2: First Blood

A few faint wisps of cloud have begun to drift into view over the top of the wall, with a larger grey shadow framing the horizon. "Rain on the way," points out Thomas, "what a way to cap off such a wonderful day." It's been half an hour, and nothing thus far has happened. Eren has taken to pacing back and forth on the edge of the roof, he even swung over to talk to the Support Squad to check that they hadn't forgotten us. So far, it seems things are going okay.

"That or casualties are too high for anyone to get back and tell us," whispers Armin. He and I are talking off to the side of the group. We're keeping our voices down so that we don't discourage the others with our rather gloomy theories about the battle's progress. "From the few plumes of smoke we've seen, there appears to have been some level of destruction already."

"Right. I even saw a few of them from a distance, moving through the streets."

Armin shivers, "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised at their appearance; descriptions always said that they'd be ugly, but I just, I wasn't really prepared."

"I saw a few five years ago, one up close. Even then I still wasn't ready to see them again. How much longer until they decide to move us up do you think?"

"Not long now I'd say. Look at the way they're standing," Armin nods towards where the Support Squad is spread out over a roof top a few blocks away. One of them is looking through a telescope. "They're nervous, and they keep pointing towards the front lines and talking as if they can't decide whether or not to go through with something. I'm almost certain it's whether or not to deploy some of the Middle guard."

"And we're the closest to the front lines. Besides, it's been half an hour now, things must be falling apart up there."

We both sit in silence for a time, Armin fidgeting with his straps for no reason besides nerves. Finally he looks up at me and asks, "Are you worried about her?"

"Who?"

"You know, Krista."

'You mean Historia,' I think but don't say. "Of course I am," I say. "But fretting won't help matters. She's reasonably agile on the 3D Gear, and her squad mates are all skilled combatants. I have to assume she'll be fine." 'Whether I believe that or not,' my mind tags on.

"Hmm," Armin murmurs. "I'll admit I'm worried about our class mates. We've all grown to know each other and in most cases respect each other. I'd hate to hear any of them was dead."

"Once this day's up, we may not have a choice in that matter."

The earlier silence descends on the squad again. It feels eerie, waiting around for someone to send you to what may well be your death. I would have expected to be terrified and shaking all over, but I'm surprisingly calm. I still feel terrified though, I don't think anything could change that. Eventually Armin gets up and talks with Eren for a while. I'm just overhearing something about bypassing rookie status, when a shout goes up. The whole squad is on their feet in an instant. "All right 34, you're to move up. The Vanguard needs support."

"Yes sir," responds Eren. "You heard him; squad 34, move up and give 'em hell!"

Eren leaps from the roof and immediately whizzes forwards. We all quickly descend from the roof top and begin to rapidly navigate our way through the streets. I can't help revelling in the experience of using my Manoeuvre Gear, I always do. I perform a mid air somersault, not for any particular reason, but because landing the move helps take my mind of the situation at hand: I'm going into battle against Humanity's greatest enemy.

"Look!" calls out Nac, pointing ahead and to the left. In the long shadow of the wall, at least ten titans can be seen, plodding dully through the streets, eyes starring ahead.

"Over there too!" adds Mina, pointing off to the right this time, to where a similar number of titans are trudging through the streets.

"The Vanguard must have been overwhelmed!" exclaims Thomas. As irrational as that sounds, I think he might be right. There isn't one soldier in sight anywhere, and surely there should be, with so many titans around. They couldn't have suffered total casualties could they? I've heard about that happening in some battles against the titans but, it just doesn't seem possible. There were over a hundred in the Vanguard, all of them experienced and fully trained; they couldn't all have been eliminated in only half an hour could they?

"We've got an abnormal. Scatter!" Eren's words cut through my thoughts like a hot knife, and I pull up immediately, grappling onto a nearby roof. The titan leaps through the air, crashing straight into a bell tower. We seem to have scattered in time, the next step is to move in and cut one of the weak points to by time for a neck strike. But for some reason, nobody moves. I follow their gazes to where the abnormal's head peeks out from behind the bell tower. It has something, no, someone, clasped in its jaws.

"Oh god," I hiss under my breath. Thomas's terrified face stares at us for a few moments, before the titan throws back its head and swallows him whole. Just like that, he's gone. Someone I knew for three years and respected as comrade, even a friend, gone in a second. The abnormal drops down into the street, turns it back to us and walks away, not even giving the huddled group of soldiers a second glance.

"Get back here!" Eren screams, hurling himself forwards. "You're going to pay for killing my friend!"

"Eren!" cries Armin, who follows him.

"Wait, stay with the group!" shouts Mina, trying to stop him. It's already too late however; both Armin and Eren are flying down the street after the titan. The other two wait only two seconds before heading after them.

'Dam it! What the hell are they doing?' I jump from the roof and head after them, hurtling through the air as fast as I can go. I try and throw myself high, in an effort to improve visibility. I'm already too late though. I see the titan just as leaps into the air, and bites Eren's left leg clean off at the joint. Eren summersaults several times over the next few roofs and lands unmoving in a heads, blood staining the roof tiles. 'Dear god no.' Screaming pulls my attention back to Mina and Nac. Nac is snatched straight out of the air by a titan which emerges from an alleyway, and another pulls on Mina's wire, hurling her to the ground.

From the blood I can already see that Nac is dead, and altering my course, I move to try and intercept the titan that grabbed Mina's wire. I whirl around a chimney firing one of my grapples into the titan's right shoulder. My positioning is bad for a neck strike, so instead I do what I do best. During the first year of training, the Commandant noted my speed and agility, as well as my poor accuracy and depth when striking. His suggestion was that I would be an excellent 'tendon cutter', a squad member whose role it is to immobilise a target by cutting one of their non fatal weak points. My speed and agility make me ideal, especially when combined with my poor depth. You don't need to cut deep to cut a tendon.

I deliver a pair of cuts to the titan's right shoulder, severing numerous tendons. The right arm falls limp. The injury prompts the titan to spin to look at me. "Mina," I shout, "move, now!" I don't have time to check that she's following through, I fire my cables into the roof opposite and slip past the titan's outstretched left hand. 'So far so good. Next I'll go for the spinal cord, seem if I can cripple him properly. Then I'll finish this.' Disgusting as it may seem, Nac's death is buying me the time I need to deal with this titan. I hope that other bastard is a slow eater.

I launch back into the attack, flying around the titan so that my swing carries my behind it. I fire my cables again, pulling myself straight forwards towards my target. I sever the spinal cord in one clean swing, a haze of blood which steams away in the air marking the entrance of my blades. With the vital control system severed, the titan falls forwards into the street. 'Perfect. Now to finish this.' But I don't fire my cables into the back of the neck. I don't move to perform the finishing blow. A terrified scream rips through the air, and stops me in my tracks. 'Armin.'

I look up just in time to see Armin's lip form dropped into the maw of a fourteen metre class. 'No. Please no.' Suddenly I see movement on the roof opposite. Covered in his own blood, unable to stand but supporting himself on his hands, is Eren. He grapples onto the titan's head and throws himself head first into its still open mouth. All I can do is watch as Armin comes flying out of the monsters jaws to land safely on a nearby roof.

All I can do is watch, as Eren struggles to keep the titan's mouth propped open, reaching out with one hand in a desperate effort to reach safety. His lips move but I can't hear the words. But I hear Armin scream, as the titan's jaws snap shut, slicing off Eren's right arm at the elbow. All I can do is watch, as the titan swallows one of my closest friends, and then thumps away, down the street.

Armin keeps screaming for almost a full minute, before dropping back down to his knees. He sits unmoving, staring blankly up at the sky. The silence breaks me out of my shock. I look about myself. The titan that ate Eren has already left, so Armin doesn't seem to be in any immediate danger. Mina crouches on the roof opposite, looking shocked. The titan I immobilised still flails desperately in the street, but I can see that the wound I dealt to its shoulder has healed, so I don't have long. There's another titan-about 9 metres-closing from behind. "Mina!" I call out. She looks up at me dully. "Can you finish off the one in the road? If you can, I'll handle the rear." She nods slowly, shaking herself out of her shock.

There's no time to see if she goes through with the attack right now. I spin on my heel and run towards the titan closing in from the rear. This is the one that ate Nac, and the one that took Eren's leg. "Come on then you son of a bitch!" I scream as I leap from the roof top, hooking into one shoulder and throwing myself high into the air. I've seen this manoeuvre done a few times before, but I've never tried it myself. I power down, straight towards the titan's nape, and deliver a slashing blow. But as I fling myself clear, I realise the cut was too shallow.

The titan turns on the spot, left hand swinging for me. I'm just far enough away that it can't grab me, yet not far enough away to avoid being hit. I impact a wall hard. It feels like I may have dislocated my shoulder. Then I fall forwards towards the street. I turn myself in mid air and fir my hooks into the slight overhang of the roof above me, pulling myself back up. I land with a clatter and find myself sprawled over the tiles. 'Get up. Keep fighting.' I push myself up on my left arm. The titan is not quite tall enough to reach me up here, but it's pawing away at the roof top all the same.

'This is going to hurt an awful lot.' I grit my teeth, and put my shoulder back in place. I can't stop myself from screaming out loud. At least I can use my right arm again though. Climbing back to my feet, I fire my grapples into the building opposite, pulling myself into the street again. The titan turns on the spot, eyes following me hungrily. 'Oh no you don't.' Spinning in mid air I fire my grapples into the titan's face and hurl myself straight at it, gauging out its eyes.

The monster howls, putting both hands over its steaming face as I pull myself up onto its head. This time I have all the time and space to set up my attack, moving back to the roof, and pulling myself in for a parallel strike. I cut the nape out properly this time around, and the titan falls forwards into the road. "That was for Nac," I hiss.

"Matthias, look out!" I hear Mina's warning just as a third titan-about 10 metres-emerges from the side street in front of me. I'm only just able to throw myself out of the way in time, cutting my leg open on the edge of a metal gutter.

"Shit," I mutter under my breath. I scramble to my feet and hurry away from the titan's reaching hand. The cut stings, but it doesn't seem to have prevented me from walking. The smoking remains in the middle of the road seem to imply Mina was successful. She's sitting beside Armin. I land as smoothly as I can given the circumstances.

"I don't know what's wrong with him," Mina gasps. "He doesn't seem to be hurt anywhere; I just can't get him to move."

I look down at Armin's blank gaze. "He must have gone into shock." I look around, the 11 metre is closing in on us fast, and I'm not prepared to keep trying my chances if I can help it. "Over there," I say, pointing to a hall, two streets over. "That should be high enough to keep us out of range of any more titans. I suppose we'll have to carry him," I add, nodding to Armin.

I haul Armin up into my arms and grapple onto the next building over. Mina follows, and in a few moments we're both secure on the roof of the hall. I prop Armin up against a chimney, and sit down. "What do we do now?" asks Mina.

I shake my head, "you're asking me? I haven't got a clue. I suppose we just have to wait for Armin to snap out of it." Mina looks down at the ground miserably.

"I just, I just can't believe it," she says after a time. "They're really gone aren't they?" She looks up at me, tears streaming down her face.

"Yes," my voice sounds dry and husky, as if it belongs to an old man. "Thomas, Nac, Eren. They're dead." I can't help myself, now I'm crying as well. Three small figures squatting on a roof top, one in shock and the other two in tears, waiting as the world turns to hell around them.


	7. Trost Part 3

Chapter 7: Trost Part 3: Rain

Nearly an hour later and Armin finally stirs. A slight shift in his posture is all, but it's something. I sit bolt upright and crawl over to him. "Armin? Armin can you hear me?" I ask, taking him by the shoulders and shaking him slightly. "Armin! Armin wake up dam it!" I shake him more violently. Finally, his pupils return to normal size and his eyes begin to move about. "Oh thank god. Mina, Armin's awake!"

Mina hurries over from the side of the roof, where she's been from the past ten minutes, watching the three titans uneasily. They've been accumulating around us steadily for the past hour, and now they surround us on all sides, five in all. I've been doing my best to ignore their hungry eyes and gaping mouths, but the knowledge that death is only a few metres away from you isn't an easy thing to ignore. Armin stares around him in confusion. I'm almost certain he can see us, since his eyes alight on both of us briefly before moving on. Suddenly, he stiffens and screams.

"Why?! Why do you have to be so worthless?!" he shrieks, pulling at his hair. "Why can't you just die?!"

"Armin, shut up!" I shout into his face. Bad enough we have this many titans already, we don't need his screaming attracting even more. But Armin clearly isn't listening; he keeps on screaming then starts hitting himself in the head. I grab his hand and force him to look at me. "Armin, calm down. I need you to focus all right?" Thankfully, he stops screaming, but now tears are pouring down his face. I don't have anything to say to him, I ran out of tears about half an hour ago.

"Please," he says finally, "please tell me it was a nightmare."

"I wish I could. I'm afraid this isn't that great a situation for you to wake to. We're trapped up here; the Titans have surrounded us."

"Then, then Eren is..." his voice trails off.

"Yes," tears start seeping back into my eyes, which I thought had already shed their fill. "Eren is, dead."

Armin sits still, looking down at the red tiles of the roof beneath him. The gray, cloud coated sky above gives the entire world a bleak sorrowful appearance. There's no rain yet, but it shouldn't be much longer now. It's as if nature itself is grieving for the massacre that's taking place here. I haven't a clue what's happened to the rest of Middle guard, and I doubt any of the Vanguard are still alive. If they are, they'll probably have fallen back to the centre of town. More than likely we're well behind enemy lines now.

"If Armin's back," says Mina, cutting off my despairing thoughts, "then we need to get out of here. Try and rendezvous with some of the other squads, find out what's going on."

"That's the problem, I'm not sure we can."

"What do you mean?"

"Look down there," I point over the side to where the two titans on our left claw eagerly at the walls, trying to get at us. "We don't have a way of getting past that. If we drop to one of the roofs on either side, we'll be too low and they'll grab us. We try to go over them and the result will be the same. I don't think there's a way past."

"You can't give up now Matthias! You saved my life back there and more or less killed two titans, are you really prepared to just sit here and die?"

I scowl, "it's not about what I'm prepared to do Mina. It just can't be done. Not without a lot more soldiers. We'd need at least another three people on another roof top to draw off some of these titans to even have a chance of getting away. Even then, we're likely far behind enemy lines by this point; we'd never make it back to the main force. It's hopeless."

I slump back against one of the chimneys emerging from the slopped roof like trees on a mountain side. I look up at the pale sky. A small flock of birds-sparrows probably-move like a faint wisp of black against the gray backdrop. They turn and twist in the air, following the wind, before fluttering over the wall and out of sight. 'If only we could do that,' I muse. 'If humans could fly...' My thoughts trail off into nothing in particular, as I accept my impending demise. Then to my surprise Armin pulls at my sleeve. "What is it?" I asked, a little annoyed at being jolted out of my thoughts.

"Look!" cries Armin, pointing towards the roof tops several streets away. I sit up and follow his finger. There, skittering along the tiled slopes, are three human figures. It's as if an unspoken prayer was just answered.

I leap to my feet, and Mina does the same. "Hey! Over here!" we both call out. The group in the distance stops where it is and sees us. I wonder what they make of this situation. It seems like a rather ridiculous one to get into when you think about it. The group begins to make their way over. "Armin, get up," I hoist him to his feet. I turn to Mina, "I'm sorry. It looks like I was wrong."

"Worry about being sorry later," she says. "For now, we need to get out of here."

As the group draws closer, I realise that I can recognise them. It's Connie, Ymir and, and Historia! 'Oh thank god. She's alive!' But what exactly do they plan on doing? I hope they don't try something stupid.

"Hey ugly," calls out Connie, waving his swords in the air to attract the attention of the two titans on their side of the building, "over here!" The two titans turn to look at the new potential meal, and both of them move towards it, leaving a space open for us.

'So much for not doing anything stupid.'

"Do we try and kill them?" asks Mina.

"No way!" I reply. "I'd much rather avoid fighting if possible. We'll jump down onto that building there and make a break for it. Follow me you two!" I leap off of the hall and land with a slight clack on the roof of the building to our right. The two resounding clacks behind me tell me that both Mina and Armin are following. One of the two titans suddenly seems to realise his original prey is escaping and turns. "Keep moving!" I call out, turning away from the looming form behind us. We should have enough time to get clear, just a bit further.

Now I can hear the footsteps of the three titans that were on the other side of the building. Even running flat out we won't outpace them for long. There, that steeple there should provide the anchor point we need. I leap from the building and fire my grapples, flying out of range of the titans' grasp. After I land I turn back to see that both Mina and Armin have made successful landings also. We're in the clear now, so long as we just keep moving.

The next few minutes are a blur of twists and turns, spins and flips as both squads try to put as much distance between us and the titans as possible. Eventually we stop on top of a roof at least twenty blocks away from where we started. Everyone's panting, not only with the exertions of moving so fast but also with the sheer rush of the moment. Historia runs up to me and throws her arms around me. I hug her back. "Matthias," she gasps, "you're okay."

"It's thanks to you guys that we are," I say. "I'm afraid I'd pretty much given up hope when you showed up."

"How did you guys end up like that anyway?" asks Connie. "And where's everyone else?"

The relief falls from my face as I remember. "There, there were some complications. Armin went into shock. We couldn't get him to move so we brought him over to that roof. We were wondering about going for help but, by the time we were both thinking clearly we had already been fenced in."

"Yes but, what about Eren, Thomas and Nac. Where are they?"

I can't say anything. 'Dam it, why can't I say anything?' All I can do is shake slightly, and try to fight off the tears from earlier. The other two are silent as well, so I assume they have the same problem. Finally, I draw a deep breath and speak. "We encountered an abnormal not long after deployment. It devoured Thomas. Eren pursued it straight away, but the rest of us were too slow to react. The squad ended up spread out all over the place. Eren lost his leg to a 9 metre, which then proceeded to devour Nac. Armin was taken by a 15 metre, but despite losing large amounts of blood, Eren saved Armin. He was swallowed in his place." I can't bring myself to keep speaking, my voice is too choked up.

"My wire got pulled," continues Mina, once it becomes clear that I can't keep speaking. "Matthias saved me from that titan and we killed it. Then he killed the one that ate Nac. Armin wasn't moving; he'd gone into shock. All we could manage was to get him as far as the building where you found us."

After she finishes, there is deathly silence. No one knows quite what to say. Eventually, I manage to stop crying and look up. "What," I begin, my voice hoarse. "What's the current situation?"

"The Vanguard is gone," explains Ymir. "The Middle guard has suffered casualties and titans have penetrated all the way back to the Rearguard. From the sounds of it though they're managing to cut those ones down. Something's holding up the evacuation, but we're not sure what. It could be another hour or more before we get the retreat order."

"Gas is likely to be running short by that point," I consider. "Are the supply teams running?"

"No sign of them so far."

"Dam it. What exactly are we trying to do right now?"

"It doesn't seem like anything really," says Connie. "Most people are trying to focus on not engaging at all. All we have to do is try to keep 'em out so, we're trying to draw them into the southern part of the city and keep 'em here."

"I see. So, what should we do?"

He shrugs. "No idea. You can try to find what's left of the Support Squad, but don't get your hopes up."

"Right, we'll do that. Come on you two, let's go."

Forty minutes later, and I'm cold, miserable and my leg feels like it's on fire. We never did track down the Support Squad, it sounds like they were killed not long after our first encounter with the Titans. It turns out Armin was right; the Vanguard had suffered extremely heavy casualties, and after our deployment turned out to be a failure, most of the Middle guard was deployed forwards. After that, things fell apart quickly. The entirety of the Vanguard is dead and little more than half of the Middle guard is still alive.

Shortage of gas is everyone's chief worry. HQ has been silent for nearly a whole hour now. From what we can make out the soldiers inside have barricaded themselves in. Titans have swarmed the place, so there's very little chance of our getting inside. The issuing of the recall signal has not helped the situation at all. No one has enough fuel left to make it back to Wall Rose. All of the Middle guard that wasn't close enough to the Wall to slip away when the recall signal went is either grouped up here, or dead.

Of the 200 + soldiers that made up the graduates from the 104th Cadet Corps, not even a hundred are present. Here in this instance is not really anywhere in particular. We've all just pooled towards the city centre. We're not far from HQ, where in theory we could gather the gas supplies we need to make it back to the Wall and escape. No one is moving though. None of the squad leaders are prepared to give the order to make the attack. That includes me now, since Eren's dead.

The situation as it stands is that we have about ninety inexperienced soldiers available, all of whom are low on gas and blades. I myself have only three left. HQ is swamped with titans. From here I'd say there are at least twenty, probably more. And that's not counting the 3-4m titans that will undoubtedly have gained entrance to the supply room itself. Making that attack would most likely be suicide. We still have most of the more elite top ten, but being one of those myself, I can't say that counts for much. If we were lucky we might gain entrance with sixty to seventy soldiers still standing. Then we'd have to kill who knows how many smaller titans with zero manoeuvrability. At best, I'd say thirty of us make it back to the Wall alive. And that estimate isn't very realistic. It's possible that we'd all die, or that less than ten would make it back. None of us is prepared to make that call yet.

If things get desperate enough I may try to round up everyone, but I doubt they'll follow me. Can't say I blame them. On top of everything else, it's raining heavily. We try to shield ourselves by clinging to the limited amount of shelter provided by overhangs, but all it takes is a slight gust of wind to make that shelter invalid. Everyone is soaked and shivering by this point.

I'm hugging myself tightly and rubbing my arms in a vain effort to maintain warmth. I lost track of Armin and Mina a while back. Most squads are in disarray. I expect they're both around here somewhere, I'm just not sure where. Finally the rain stops. Finally may not be the best term I suppose, since it only rained for about twenty minutes. It sure felt a lot longer though. People begin to emerge back out into the 'open' again. I'd like to move between the different roof tops to try and see who's around, but I can't afford to waste gas on pointless movement.

With nothing better to do, I pick up a loose piece of tile and begin scratching a line on the outer side of my right sheath. After the first I add a second, and then scratch the letter 'K' above the two lines. I then proceed to make another line on my left sheathe and write the letter 'A'. Reiner-who happens to be on the same roof top-turns around at the noise as I throw the broken piece of tile away. "Ah," he grunts knowledgably. "You're keeping a count."

"Can't see a reason why I shouldn't," I reply. "If I'm going to die they can know how many I took with me. Besides, it helps add some feeling of accomplishment."

"We could all do with some more of that. This place feels dead."

I sigh, "That's because it is. If we can't take HQ, those of us who aren't dead will be soon."

"And even then we may all end up dead?"

"Yeah. Those are the odds at least."

"You think we should still try it?"

I hang my head. "To tell you the truth Reiner, I know we should. But I'm just so terrified of doing it. I'm terrified of dying, and of being responsible for the deaths of others. That's why no one's giving the order to move out."

"Yeah, I don't really want to give that order either. We have to move out at some point though; the Titans won't ignore this large a group of people for long."

The wind whistles through the air above us, carrying the smells of water, stone, slate and blood. Just down in the streets-wherever a battle's been fought-there are practically vistas of red. Some was washed away by the rain, but most still clings stubbornly to the cobbles. It makes me feel sick, as do the Titans' disgusting leftovers: bits of flesh that weren't swallowed. Most are arms, legs, hands or feet, but occasionally there are larger parts, entire halves of a body left behind. And of course, crushed bodies are also reasonably common. Often a titan seems to pulverise its food too much to eat it, and so just leaves the sticky mess behind.

"Well," I begin, "I don't intend to just sit down and die quietly. There's that old saying: "we have nothing to fear but fear itself." I think it's rather appropriate now don't you? We stay here we **will** die, we attack, we will probably die but we may not. There's only one way to find out."

"Ugh, I don't like where this is going," groans Reiner. "All right then. We'll need to gather all the squad leaders up and see if we can formulate a plan of attack then."

"Right. I'll go fetch Jean, you go and-"

"Hey!" shouts someone I can't see, "what's that?"

Off in the distance is a lone figure, heading over the roof tops towards us. They're coming from the direction of Wall Rose. "It's probably just another straggler," calls someone else.

'No. The odds of there being members of the Middle guard still loose are miniscule. Besides, all squads are accounted for as far as I can make out. This person could be from the Rearguard, but what are they doing here?'

My question doesn't remain unanswered for very long. "It's Mikasa!" some announces. That stirs up a reaction. Mikasa was assigned to the elites in the Rearguard because of her high performance in training Eren told me.

'Oh no, Eren. What do I tell her? How can I explain that he's gone? I can barely believe it myself so far.' As she descends onto our roof top I get a clear look and it is indeed Mikasa. 'Dam it, what do I do?' I don't have the chance to really think that through however, she spots me almost straight away and hurries over.

"Matthias, where's Eren?"

'She had to cut straight to the point didn't she? What the hell do I do now?' Unlike the last time, I don't feel any tears coming; I'm so tired I don't think I could manage it. "Mikasa, Eren is, is. I'm sorry, he's gone." She stares at me, eyes glazed over in disbelief. "We ran into an abnormal, the squad got split up and, and well. I, I'm sorry." I can't manage anything else. I don't feel sad this time, I feel ashamed. I feel, responsible for this. I should have paid more attention to what was happening, I could have saved Armin without Eren dying. It didn't need to happen. I just can't find the words to say it.

Mikasa still hasn't moved. She just stares at me, unmoving. "I'm sorry," I repeat lamely. Then her eyes change. The emotion and shock that filled them for a few moments is replaced by a bland expressionless black. It's like staring into pits of ash.

She turns away to look around us. "Where's Armin? Is he dead as well?"

"No. He's around here somewhere I think."

"Where?"

"I don't know. The squad got split up earlier, and now I don't know where anyone is. I think I saw him land somewhere over there though." I point towards a roof two streets over.

"Wait here. I'll be right back." She swings away towards the other building.

'What's she going to do? If she helps us, we might be able to clear HQ with far fewer losses. But will she? Maybe, but right now I'm really not sure what she's going to do.' Since all I can do is wait, I sit back down again, running my fingers over the kill marks on my sheath. If circumstances had been different, I probably would have been proud. I've killed two titans, played a major part in killing a third, and I've managed to rescue two of my squad mates. Not sure I'll ever feel pride again though, and most certainly not right now.

In a few minutes Mikasa is back, Armin trailing behind her. "Marco," she says, prompting the freckled lad to look up from the ground to face her. "Currently HQ is overrun with titans. If we get past them we can refuel our gear and retreat over the wall. Is that assessment correct?"

"Well, yes," Marco replies. "But there's just too many. Even with you to help us."

"I can do it!" This last part she shouts, drawing attention from everyone around us. "Know this!" she cries, holding one of her swords in the air to draw the attention of all the other soldiers nearby. "I have the power to slay all the titans which block our path!"

"That's insane!" cries Marco in exasperation.

"I'm strong, real strong. None of you come close! I am a warrior! As far as I'm concerned I am surrounded by a bunch of cowardly, spineless worms! You can follow me or you can stay here and die. I will clear HQ with or without your help, it doesn't matter!"

"Mikasa," I call out. "Don't be stupid; you can't take them all on by yourself!"

"If I can't beat them then I die. But if I win I get to live, and the only way to win, is to fight!" And with that she leaps from the building, heading for HQ.

"She's insane," I hear someone say.

Then something unexpected happens. I hear Jean's voice. "Hey, since when were we taught to let our comrades fight alone?! So come on, unless you are a coward in which case stay out of my way!" He runs at full speed to the end of the building and jumps off after Mikasa.

"Ah hell," I mutter. "Okay then, you all heard him! Forwards, for Humanity!" I sprint after Jean and grapple onto the nearest building, throwing myself into the air. Behind me I hear a multitude of footsteps and firing grapples. I'm not sure what did the job just then, but whatever it was the survivors from the Middle guard are on the move. The attack has begun.


	8. Trost Part 4

Chapter 8: Trost Part 4: The Berserker

The air whistles past me giving my ears a cold tinge. Hopefully movement helps my clothes dry out faster. There's a ten metre class up ahead which Mikasa downs it with a precision strike. She's been keeping the lead ever since the start now, how exactly I'm not sure. I know for a fact that over both short and long distances I'm the fastest. Have I over estimated myself? In this case I have my doubts, and because of that I'm starting to worry. In theory I know I could go faster, but the need to conserve fuel is holding me back. The fact that Mikasa is moving ahead so rapidly may not be a good sign in that regard.

Two titans are up ahead now; an eleven metre and a nine metre. Mikasa cuts down the elven metre, but ignores the nine metre. 'Oh boy, I'll only have the one shot at this so I'd better get it right.' The nine metre has its back to me, looking after Mikasa who is already flying away down the street. I hook onto the back of its neck and hurl myself forwards. One shot at this; we can't afford to slow down. I can't say that the cut is particularly neat, but it is deep. The large chunk of flesh gouged from place by my blade strike flies into the air behind me, followed by a massive spurt of blood. 'That's another scratch on the right side.'

We keep moving, so far no one near the front has been lost but I worry about titans intercepting the rear. As far as I can tell all of the skilled titan killers from the top ten are at the front of the assault, so if a titan appears in the rear taking it down will be difficult. I spare a glance up at the horizon to see HQ drawing steadily closer. It's still some distance however, and we've been going for almost five minutes now. I'm conscious that at any moment my gas supply could run out, leaving me to plummet towards an immobile death on the ground. I've started now though, so there's no choice but to keep going. I sure hope there aren't too many more titans between us and HQ though; I doubt I can pull that kill from earlier off a second time.

Suddenly Mikasa freezes in mid air, falling forwards towards the ground. 'Dam it! I was right; she was using too much gas all at once.'

"Mikasa!" I hear Armin call out. He steers out of the route forwards to pursue her falling form. Connie breaks off to go after Armin, but the rest of the group seems to keep its momentum. I deliberately stop on one of the roof tops to try and figure out what's going on. I can't spot where Mikasa landed. I can see several titans of various heights moving around though. Two fifteen metres and a pair of ten metres, spread out over various streets. One of those ten metres looks unpleasantly familiar; it's the one that I overlooked earlier when our squad was massacred. The assault is still moving but for how long? Can we keep up our momentum with the best fighter gone?

'Doesn't matter; we either do or we don't. All I can do is to try and help retrieve her as fast as possible. There's a lot of titans over there.' Frustrated I swing towards where I last saw Mikasa, leaving the attack to its own devices. There's a five metre I didn't notice before. 'This place is crawling with titans. It's almost like something's drawing them here. There couldn't be any groups of humans left around here could there?' The ten metre from earlier seems to have a specific target, so that's a good starting point.

As I fly overhead, I spot Armin running along a separate set of roofs to my left. I can't see Connie anywhere though. 'Come on Mikasa where are you?' I skim low moving towards where the ten metre is now bending over. 'Guess that answers that question.' It stumbles and falls out of sight below the line of the roofs. One of the fifteen metres is also heading towards that point, and I can just see the top of another titan's head coming this way too. This must be the point they're congregating; Mikasa's got to be here.

I land on the nearby roof top and run forwards, just as the ten metre looms back to its full height. The fifteen metre rounds the corner. Down in the alley way there, it's her. Mikasa's holding a single shattered blade in her right hand, backed between the two titans. 'What do I do? Maybe if I can take out or at least distract the ten metre, she can-

I don't finish my thought though. With a great resounding boom, the fifteen metre lashes out and punches the ten metre straight in the face, causing the ten metre's jaw to shatter sending blood spurting into the air. 'What in the hell? How is that possible?' The decked ten metre hits the ground hard, sending dust flying up into the air. The fifteen metre then looms over it, stamping down on the felled titan's weak spot over and over and over again. 'Is it, fighting over Mikasa? Or is that thing just plain crazy?' Eventually, the titan steps back from the now steaming corpse. It throws back its head and roars, the great booming shriek echoing off of the surrounding buildings. Its so loud that I have to cover my ears.

Once the titan finishes with its scream, it turns its back on Mikasa and stomps away. 'It, it ignored her? And me as well? That's not possible, it just isn't. A titan would never give up on the chance of a meal; it's their entire purpose, the driving force behind them. And, and it killed that other titan. That in itself is unheard of.' I shake myself out of my confusion. Mikasa's still down there and I can't leave her; other titans may come after this. I turn to go down for her, but Armin's one step ahead of me. He doesn't do it with much grace, but he scoops her up from the ground, more or less crashing both of them onto a roof.

"Armin!" I call out, running over and jumping the gap between the two buildings. "Did, did you see that?"

"See what?" he asks.

"How in the hell did you miss that?! That, that titan just killed the other one!"

"What?" Armin's face is whipped over by a look of total confusion. He looks to Mikasa for confirmation of this impossible fact.

"It's true," she says. "I don't understand how or why, but it's true."

"B-but no one's ever heard of a titan attacking its own kind before."

Suddenly Connie lands on the roof behind them. "Guys come on, we've got to go!" he shouts. "There's two fifteen metres over that way, and a ten metre closing in fast."

"We can't go anywhere," I explain. "Mikasa fell because she ran out of gas."

"What?!" Mikasa looks down, a little embarrassed if I didn't know better. "We can't clear HQ without you. What are we gonna do?!"

"Connie, calm down," I say, trying to keep my voice level. "We all have some gas left; maybe if we balance it out between us all we'll have enough to make it."

Armin shakes his head, "No. You're being over optimistic Matthias. It's possible none of us has enough gas to get to HQ to begin with. Splitting it up will make certain none of us do."

"That what do you propose we do?" I ask. "Connie's right: if we try to clear HQ without Mikasa casualties will go up by twenty five, maybe even fifty percent of our total numbers."

"I'm not saying we leave her behind," says Armin. There's a look in his eye that I don't like at all, it seems much to resigned.

"One of us is going to have to give up their gas, not some from everyone, just one. And that one is going to be me."

"Armin, you can't be serious."

"I am," he says and I can tell from his expression that he's determined. Even as he speaks he slides out his own left gas cylinder and connects it to Mikasa's. As the gas transfers between the two tanks, he starts removing his blades and sliding them into Mikasa's now empty sheathes. The transference of gas from the left cylinder completes and he starts on the right one. We all just stare, unmoving. It seems incredible that Armin would be prepared to make that kind of a sacrifice.

'No, wait. That's not what this is about is it. Armin isn't doing this to save Mikasa, that's just a benefit, or an excuse. He's executing himself. He feels that he's responsible for Eren's death.' "Armin, don't do this. We can figure something else out," I protest.

"There's no time now. The others will reach HQ soon and they'll need all three of you to clear out the titans there." As he finishes, he disconnects his gas tank from Mikasa's, and slumps down to his knees. "That should do it. I'm afraid there's not too much in them, but they're better than your empty ones. Now, you guys go, just leave me with this okay?" He holds up the shattered blade that Mikasa was trying to defend herself with earlier. "It's just that, I'd rather this be my end, than being eaten alive."

Before he can do anything with the blade however, Mikasa snatches it out of his hands and throws it over the edge. "B-b-but, why?" Armin stutters.

"Armin," says Mikasa, her voice very firm, but a little warmer than it is normally. "I am not going to leave you behind."

"Nor am I," I say. "So come on Armin, on your feet." I haul Armin up and look into his eyes. "Don't be an idiot Armin. I know you well enough to know what you were thinking just then, and it wasn't your fault." Armin sniffs and looks down. "Connie," I say turning, "do you think you can manage to carry him?"

"I can try," he says, looking a little muddled.

"Wait a moment," says Armin suddenly. "What about that titan that you said killed-

Suddenly there is a second echoing shriek of a roar that makes my spine tingle. We all spin round to see Mikasa's fifteen metre tall rescuer facing down a second fifteen metre. It's only at this point that the stark contrast between the two titans hits me. The berserk titan seems to have a body proportioned normally, with reasonable length arms and legs. The other has arms that droop down farther than they ought to, as well as a head that's slightly too small. The normal titan's eyes are dull, while the berserker's eyes flash a glowing bright green. The biggest difference however, is how athletic the berserker titan is. Most titans appear fat and deformed, often with shrivelled arms and legs. This titan however, is I'd have to say something of a physical specimen being heavy muscled all over.

The really strange thing though, is the position it takes up. Both hands balled up into fists, raised in a comfortable way, ready to strike rapidly at a target. "That's a proper combat stance," I whisper to the others, being too caught up in the moment to raise my voice. The second, 'normal' titan roars back at the first, then runs wildly forwards, mouth open. Just from comparing the way the two are standing, it's obvious who the winner will be.

The berserker titan makes a single solid punch, which-to the amazement of everyone watching-sends its attacker's head clean off and into a nearby building. The decapitated corpse falls forwards and lays still, the neck steaming away slowly. As the titan begins to twitch again, the berserker smashes its foot down into the weak spot, killing the titan instantly. All the four of us can do is to stand speechless for a moment. The berserker roars its triumph to the skies-which I now notice have just cleared to let in the sun.

"That," Connie stutters, "that was insane."

"Got that right," I agree. "Well Armin, does that answer your question?"

"Mostly," Armin more or less squeaks. He coughs before continuing. "I have an idea though. What if we could, well, lure him back to HQ?"

"Wait, what?" I ask. "How would we do that?"

"More importantly," buts in Connie, "why would we do that? You saw that thing. I don't know about you but I don't want to be on the receiving end of one of those punches."

"Shut up you two!" snaps Mikasa. "Let him talk."

We both fall silent. "Thank you," says Armin. "Look at him for a moment, look at what he's doing. He's ignoring us, despite the fact that there are no titans within visual range. He should be on top of us by now, abnormal or not. I don't think he cares about us at all."

"In that case, how do we lure him?" I ask. Knowing Armin he probably has some idea, and I'm starting to become intrigued.

"I figure that he must work in a similar way to most titans," Armin explains. "Normally titans are drawn to large groups of people; well he would probably be drawn towards large groups of titans. That means that he's likely to head straight for HQ once he thinks there aren't any more titans to fight here. We need to clear the way for him."

"So basically," asks Connie exasperated. "Your plan is to recruit a titan?"

"Well, yes."

"Am I the only one who sees the problem with this? How do we know he'll keep ignoring us?"

"We don't. But if he can keep any new titans from entering the supply room and clear away at least some of those who are outside, it would be worth the risk wouldn't it?"

"I think he's right," says Mikasa.

"You've got to be kidding me!"

"I'm afraid not Connie," I say. "I think it's worth a shot too."

Connie looks at all three of us in exasperation for a few seconds, then raises both hands in surrender. "Okay then. But just so you know, if he eats you, it's not my fault."

"Noted," says Armin gloomily. "All right, Mikasa, do you think you can take down the incoming ten metre?" Mikasa nods. "In that case, let's go."

Connie picks up Armin, and I go off the roof first. The ten metre titan has rounded the corner now, with an eleven metre following it. The berserker roars furiously at the two of them, running forwards and grappling with the eleven metre. The ten metre draws closer, jaws open wide. Mikasa flies forwards in blur of motion and flashing blades, slicing open the back of the titan's neck with a single clean stroke. Blood spurts into the air as the titan gives a choking snarl, then falls forwards into a building. As the flesh begins to melt from its bones, the titan's middle cracks backwards and its body falls into the street.

The berserker titan shoves the eleven metre titan into the wall, before pounding it over and over again with its fists. I cover my eyes as dust and blood whizz into the air, creating a blinding red veil. The remains of the titan slump to the ground, steam rising from the broken form. The berserker looks around, as if in confusion. Then it turns and starts walking, away from HQ. "Dam it!" I hear Connie shout. "Where is he going?"

"Hey you!" I yell, firing my cables into the side of the berserker's neck. I spin around so that I'm facing the titan and stab both my blades into its forehead. "Pay attention to me!"

"Matthias what the hell?!"

I hang over the titan's forehead, staring it straight in the eyes. "I don't know if you can understand me or not, but if you can pay attention. You want to kill titans right? Well I know where you can find as many as you want! If you want them follow me! If you can't understand me of course, then there's always another kind of incentive isn't there?" Ripping both blades out of his forehead, I slash a deep groove in the berserker's nose. It howls in pain and snatches at me as I jump out of its reach. "You want me?" I more or less scream due to an intense sense of fear. "Then come and get me!" I jump out of the way as he swings at the roof top where I was standing. I grapple to the next building. "Come on then!" Steam rising from its face the berserker stomps after me, the white gas framing his burning green eyes.

"That's right, come and get me."

"Matthias what are you doing?!" Mikasa screams.

"Armin said to lure him!"

"That was not part of the plan!" Armin retorts.

"Consider the plan changed then!" I jump out of the way as the berserker smashes his fist down onto the roof, sending broken bits of tile into the air. I fly on further down the street and the berserker follows. 'What in the hell was I thinking? What even gave me that idea? Oh well, I've started now so I can't stop.' Slowly but surely the berserker follows me as I make steady hops closer and closer to HQ.

"This is taking too long," says Armin. "By the time we reach HQ it will be far too late."

"Surely if we can get him close enough so that he can see the other titans that will do the job?" Armin holds a grim silence in response. 'This will work. It has to work.'

The ground shakes as a pair of massive feet pound rapidly over the ground. The shriek of the berserker echoes out of the streets behind us as the fifteen metre monstrosity hurtles towards HQ. He charges straight into a pair of titans squatting next to a hole in the wall of the castle, sending them both flying at least forty metres backwards. I aim for one of the already broken windows in the side of the castle and covering my head as I tumble inside.

I look up to see Mikasa, Connie and Armin all land behind me. Standing, staring at the titan outside as if he's in some kind of stupor is Jean. "You are never going to guess what we found Jean!" I gasp excitedly.

"Yeah," Connie interrupts. "It's an abnormal who's got a bone to pick with own kind. And he doesn't give a crap about us!"

"You're not serious?" says Jean.

"Perfectly," I say. "He's already killed three of them so far. We're hoping he'll keep the titans occupied for now." Jean opens his mouth, then closes it again. My smile fades as I look over the huddle of soldiers at the back of the room. "Where, where is everyone?"

Jean looks down at the ground. "This is everyone."

Of the ninety or so members of the Middle guard that launched the assault on HQ, less than fifty appear to have made it through.


	9. Trost Part 5

Chapter 9: Trost Part 5: Escaping the Net

After all of this I feel just about ready to buckle. I've been on my feet since dawn, and in a combat situation since before midday. I'm hungry, thirsty and incredibly tired. Every fibre of my body is telling me to pack it in. What I wouldn't give to be able to sleep right now. But we're not done, the day is still going. We've reached the supply depot; now all we need to do is clear the supply room. From what we know there are eight titans in the supply room all roughly four metres tall. Thankfully no more seem to be coming in. I suppose we can attribute that to our fifteen metre tall psychotic friend outside. How we're meant to clear the room itself is beyond me though.

"So," I say as I slump down next to Armin, "what do you think our options are?"

"Why are you asking me?" he asks confused.

"You've done pretty well so far haven't you? Got any ideas?"

"Well, I've been thinking about the lift that lowers into the middle of the room. We could draw all the titans into one place by filling that with as many people as possible and lowering it into the middle of the room."

I nod slowly, following his train of thought. "The rest of us could be up in the rafters..."

"Waiting to jump down and cut the titans' weak spots," finishes Armin. "The only problem is, we need some way to keep the titans in place when we make the attack; buy us some time."

We both sit still thinking. I do my best to keep my thoughts on the problem at hand, but it's hard. Historia never showed up to the central meeting point before we attacked. No one knows what happened to her along with Ymir and a few others. I feel like pulling my hair out at the roots with worry. Something else has been gnawing at me as well since the hour I spent on a roof with Mina and Armin. If Historia's real name isn't Krista, what else about her isn't real? Who exactly is she, and do I know her at all really? Have I fallen in love with a person who doesn't exist? 'You know, I think that's the first time I've admitted that I'm in love with her. Or at least I'm love with who I think she is. I guess this just gives me another reason to survive: I need to find out who she is.'

I'm snapped out of my thoughts by a clattering from the doorway. I look up and see Jean holding a musket. "Okay people listen up," he announces. "We've got several dozen muskets here, courtesy of the Military Police." He looks down the barrel and blows over the weapon, sending a cloud of grey into the air. "Ugh, and covered in a layer of dust," he coughs.

Armin looks at me and smiles. "Jean!" he cries out, jumping to his feet. "Do they have buckshot?"

"Yeah I think so, why?"

"That's exactly what need right now."

"What? Armin are you sure about that? I mean, are guns even effective?"

"Not as such," admits Armin. "But that doesn't matter."

"Come on over and listen everyone," I call out. "Armin's got a plan."

Armin turns a little red around the ears and gives me an agonised look. People stop leaning against the walls and come over however, leaning in to hear. "Uh, well," Armin begins nervously. "We're looking at eight titans in the supply room of the four metre variety. My plan is to lower the central lift down to what ought to be head level for the titans. The lift will need to be packed with as many people as possible to draw the titans attention. Once they're close enough those of us inside the lift will fire into the titans' eyes, blinding them. At that moment eight of us jump down from the rafters and strike the titans down." Armin looks up at everyone gathered around him. "These will have to be the eight people here most adept at slaying titans; you'll only have the one shot at this. Eight people have to kill eight titans at the same moment." Armin falls silent and looks down at the floor. "I recognise it's rather a long shot, but it's the best I've got."

"Well, for a long shot I'd say it's a pretty good plan," says Marco.

Most people nod in agreement. "Hey now," protests Armin, "one half-baked strategy can't be our only option can it?"

"I wouldn't call it half-baked," says someone I can't see.

"No," says Annie, "the risk is the same all round, and if we pull this off we get out of here with no losses."

Armin doesn't say anything, he just trembles slightly. "Hey," I say, putting my hand on his shoulder for encouragement. "Don't sell yourself short here Armin. The plan is good. I believe it will work."

"You have a rare gift for strategy," adds Mikasa. "That mind saved Eren and me more than once."

"What?" asks Armin disbelievingly. "When on earth did I ever save you guys?"

"Most of the occasions would take a while to explain, for now suffice to say you did. Now come on, we need to get ready." Armin nods slowly, and gets to his feet.

"So," I ask, "who exactly might you have in mind for those eight titan slayers?"

'Why the hell did I ask?' We're all crouching on top of the rafters with two people on each side of the lift shaft. Mikasa, Annie, Jean, Connie, Sasha, Reiner, Bertolt and me, blades drawn, and speaking for myself not particularly comfortable. I suppose we should count ourselves lucky to have so many of the best in the Corps available to us, but right now I'm wishing I'd struck out when it came to my scores. This kind of pressure isn't what I was hoping for. If we screw this up more than likely most of us will die or at least get injured. 'Where the hell is the lift?'

I realise the heat up here is starting to make me irritable. 'Okay, just try to calm down and think of something else then.' But before I can get my mind into a more relaxed state, the clunk of the lift beginning its descent echoes into the chamber. The huddle of soldiers inside the lift are all clutching muskets like pieces of drift wood at sea. I hope none of them go off by mistake. As the lift comes to a stop, so do the thud, thud, thud of the titans' footsteps. One by one the four metre tall abominations turn their heads to face the new appetiser. 'They must be thinking they hit the jackpot right about now. That is if they can think anything.'

Suddenly a white light flashes over my vision, blinding me. When it clears I can't see the supply room, the titans or the lift. I can see a brightly lit field with trees in the distance. There's a little girl running around after a butterfly. 'Where am I?' The sun feels like, well like nothing. I can still feel myself crouching on the wooden beam, but I can't hear the titans or see anything except the brightly light landscape before me. 'Is this, a memory of some kind? No, it couldn't be; I've never been to a place like this in my whole life. Unless this is from before the accident. Even so, when would I have been in a place like this?'

The girl trips over something in the grass and falls over. Laughing she gets up unhurt and turns to look at me. Somehow I feel like I ought to know her, even though I know I've never seen her before. "Come on now you two!" calls out a voice from behind me. "It's time for lunch." I turn around to see who's speaking. I catch a glimpse of a large building with trees around it, but before I can see anything more the same white light from before engulfs me and I'm back in the supply room again.

'Wait no!' I almost call out. The vista is gone and I'm back to staring at the lift. The titans have all turned to face the prize meal and some have begun to walk towards it. The soldiers have raised their weapons. Most are shaking with fear, sweat running down their faces. There's a titan right underneath me, long matted dark hair hanging in clumps below its shoulders. 'I suppose titans don't find all that much time to wash.'

Now I'm not sure what to watch; the titans as they close in on the lift or the dark haired titan beneath me. I have to make sure I'm in the right position to garantee a good strike. "Hold steady," says Marco, his voice level despite the tense situation. The titans are now only a few steps away from the lift. "Hold." One of them leans in as if to look straight in the eyes of its prey. "Hold." All eight titans are now staring straight at the lift, surrounding it on all sides. If this goes wrong somehow, the lift will never get away. "FIRE!"

With a violent crack, a bright flash and a curtain of smoke all of the muskets fire at once, ripping into the titans' eyes. Eight terrible shrieks of pain act like a starter pistol as all eight of us run forwards along the wooden beams towards the titans. I jump, only a metre above my target. I swing my blades down, carving a pair of crimson lines through my target's neck. I don't manage to cut the nape clean out, but the damage is enough. The titan freezes instantly and falls forwards. The wound spurts blood, spattering my face with red gore. In panic I try to reach up to my eyes, screwing up my landing and dropping clumsily on both feet. Pain lances through my legs and I fall straight onto my back. My head hits with an unpleasant crack, and for a moment I writhe on the ground, whipping at the boiling hot sticky mess on my face.

With difficulty I clear my vision, unveiling a dim and red tinged display of the world around me. Steam rises from six corpses surrounding the lift on three sides. 'Wait, only six? Shit!' Sasha screams as the titan she just failed to kill dives after her, sending a cloud of dust into the air. I scramble back to my feet in time to see Annie push off one of the pillars, using the extra height to slash open the neck of one of the surviving titans. At roughly the same time Mikasa performs a mid air spin, cutting into the neck of Sasha's titan multiple times. After that, everyone is still. Steam rises steadily from the eight giant cadavers giving the room a bizarre atmosphere.

Jean signals the lift to come down and everyone immediately begins to pile out. The lift is quickly sent back up again so that those upstairs can come down. Everyone begins to hastily connect their gas tanks to the large cylinders by the walls, while those who can't find a socket rush towards the armoury to gather fresh blades. I let out a long sigh of relief. 'That's another scratch on the right. I wonder how many I'll have before the end?' I stretch and turn towards the armoury, since all of the sockets are currently in use and probably will be for the next ten minutes or so. 'I hope that berserker titan outside can buy us that much time.'

As I slot fresh blades into my sheathes I dwell on my brief vision before the fight. 'Where was that place? Maybe I was really there at some point; it did feel familiar. In fact it felt, safe. And that girl, I'm pretty sure I never really knew any girls during my childhood. I may not remember all that clearly, but I know I grew up in Rieskrippe. There were only two girls who ever lived there and she wasn't either of them.' "Aaaaah," I moan quietly, "when is this ride ever going to end? I feel like I've been thrown in every possible direction, including inside out!"

"Then I suppose it shouldn't be that much of a surprise that you're talking to yourself then?" I turn around to see Armin. "This day's been hard on everyone, I can understand the stress."

"It's more than that," I sigh. "I think I might have had a kind of hallucination earlier. It was bright and sunny with a blue sky. There was a field, with flowers and butterflies. And there was this girl, a little girl; about five I'd say. She seemed, so familiar. But I know I've never met her in my life."

Armin flashes a concerned frown. "It's probably just the moment getting to you. You had a lot on your plate just then."

"Right," I agree. Inside though I'm not so sure about that. 'I'll have to try and figure this out later though, for now I need to focus on getting out of this alive.' Taking one of the new blades I scratch two fresh lines on the 'Kill' side of my gear.

"Four so far. I wish I could say I had a few kills or assists to my name."

"I'd say you earned eight assists just then," I say with a grin. "It was your plan after all."

"Yeah, but I didn't actually do anything."

"If it wasn't for your plan we would have lost a lot of good people. I'd say you did a job just as important as those of us who struck the killing blow."

"Maybe," Armin falls silent.

"Come on," I turn around to face him straight on. "Let's go and refuel. This nightmare's finally about to end, and it's thanks in no small part to you. Try to cheer up a bit."

"It's just," Armin stutters as we walk over towards the gas cylinders and stand in line, waiting for the current user to finish their turn. "I can't help remembering that there were six of us when we were last here."

That gets to me. Thomas, Nac, Eren... "Wait, Mina! Where's Mina?" I exclaim suddenly. "Did you see her anywhere?" Armin shakes his head sadly. "Don't think like that Armin! She's got to be around here somewhere hasn't she? She was with us when we started out; I saw her on one of the roof tops."

"Matthias, a lot of people didn't make to HQ."

"No! Not after all that! She survived all of that, she can't be dead now. She, she..." I groan. "This just isn't fair," I mutter bitterly. It's a final statement though. Somewhere out in those streets is the blood of Mina Carloina, and I'd like to think that she wasn't defiled enough that they left a few other parts of her behind to rot in the sun. I suppose I should cry or something, but by this point I really don't have the energy to be truly sorrowful, just depressed and disappointed. "I," I say, as I bend down to connect my gas tank up to the cylinder, "I just want to go home."

In a few minutes both me and Armin have refuelled our gear and are ready to depart. "Where's Mikasa?" he asks looking around for her.

"She went out onto the roof earlier," calls out Connie as he rushes for the stairs out of the room. "If she hasn't headed back to the Wall yet she'll be up there."

"Thanks!" Armin calls out after him.

Together the two of us take the stairs out into the courtyard and grapple up onto the roof. Mikasa is indeed still there looking down into the courtyard. At the other end of the roof are Reiner, Annie and Bertolt, and Jean stands on the back slope of the roof, lingering. Armin and I land and hurry over. "Mikasa, what's wrong?" Armin asks.

"That titan," she whispers. I turn to look, and can hardly keep myself from throwing up. The berserker titan is pinned against the wall of a house with six more titans on top of him. "They're eating him." Both of the berserker's arms have been ripped off, and the other titans are gnawing on his flesh. The entirety of his left side has been eaten away showing his ribcage, through which I'm pretty sure I can see his internal organs. He tugs vainly at his kin with his mouth, trying to pull them away, but it looks like his energy is failing him. The regular titans continue to rip the flesh from his bones.

"Cannibalism?" gasps Armin.

"I guess it's the only way titans know how to kill something," I growl in disgust, "They eat it."

"We have to try and save him," says Mikasa firmly.

"What? Are you insane?!" cries Jean. "That abnormal may have saved our hides but he's still a titan!"

"Regardless," I reply, "he could still be very useful to us in the future. At the least he's a valuable test subject. If we could figure out why he's fighting his own kind, perhaps we can figure out some way to turn other titans over to our side."

"But he's not on 'our side'! He's on a side all his own."

"I'll help get him out if you guys are up for it," interrupts Reiner.

"What? Reiner have you lost it?"

"He's right," says Annie. "A cannon's got nothing on a titan who likes to rip apart his own kind. He's likely to be incredibly useful to us."

"You're all insane, the lot of you! You can't ally a titan!"

Suddenly Armin grabs me by the arm. "Look," he says, pointing to a blonde haired twelve metre titan that's just strode into the courtyard. "It's the abnormal that ate Thomas!"

Suddenly the berserker lets out a terrifying roar, tearing free from his enemies and charging strait towards the newcomer. He leaves behind the last remnants of his right arm in the jaws of another titan, but he doesn't even slow down. Still roaring he dives on the twelve metre sinking his teeth deep into the abnormal's weak spot. Blood spurts into the air as the berserker shakes his prey left and right, like a wolf attempting to rip flesh from a carcass. With a guttural growl the armless attacker sinks his teeth in as deep as they'll go sending a huge spray of blood into the air.

The blonde abnormal slumps limp in his jaws, steam already beginning to rise from its body. A fourteen metre is moving in towards the berserker. 'This has got to be it; surely he can't keep fighting like this much longer?' As if to prove me wrong the fifteen metre tall monster hurls the body in his jaws straight into his enemy, crushing the fourteen metre against a nearby building. Throwing his head back he gives one final deafening howl of a roar, and then falls forwards onto his face.

Steam begins to billow from the dead body, the flesh turning black and drifting away on the breeze. I can't begin to describe my immense disappointment. The opportunity we've lost here is just, unthinkable. Then something on the blackening body catches my eye. It's a kind of darker patch on the nape, a smudge about 2 metres long and 50 centimetres wide. Then, to my astonishment-and clearly that of everyone else watching-the dark patch begins to move. It stretches upwards towards the sky, and then bursts open.

Out of it comes, no, it can't be. A person! A human form emerges, long sticky tendrils of dark red flesh pulling away from its face. The human practically falls out of the dark patch before slumping forward slightly and kneeling on top of the dissolving nape. The figure looks like a young man with short dark hair, dressed in a faded brown shirt with what look like ODM harness straps on. His face, even from here looks familiar. "No," I whisper, "It couldn't be him, could it?"

Suddenly Mikasa is off the roof gliding to the ground and running desperately towards the figure. When she reaches him she grabs him in an embrace, and I can hear her crying from all the way up here. "It just can't be," I mumble feebly. Dropping down from the roof myself I walk slowly-as if in a daze-towards the smoking titan corpse. I scramble up onto the nape, to where the figure sits clutched in Mikasa's arms. The figure, of Eren Yeager.


	10. Trost Part 6

Chapter 10: Trost Part 6: Under Suspicion

The atmosphere on the inside of Wall Rose is decidedly negative. Most people are sitting around whimpering or just looking blankly at the dirt. Those that have managed to keep everything together are in most cases trying to comfort the rest. I'm surprised by how many soldiers there still are after that massacre. I suppose reinforcements may have arrived since the battle started. I'd estimate there to be at least five hundred, possibly more. We've been left to our own devices for the time being, provided we don't leave the area. To be honest I'm not sure what command hopes to achieve now. No one here honestly thinks we can retake the city, and if the armoured titan appears it won't matter how many of us there are. Stopping him is likely to be impossible.

My mind takes all of these facts in, turns them around a few times, and then dumps them on the ground. By this point I honestly don't care. Nothing seems to matter anymore, not after that. Well, almost nothing.

"Do you seriously mean to tell me Eren was the abnormal all along?" asks Jean, stunned.

"We saw him come out of its weak spot only a few minutes ago," I say. "I'm prepared to believe it."

After hauling Eren up onto the roof top, we're still not sure what to think. Mikasa is still holding Eren closely, sobbing quietly every few moments. I can't begin to imagine how she must be feeling after that. I'm shocked to the point where I can't decide whether to laugh or cry, and I can't imagine how it must feel for someone who owes Eren their life. Someone who loves him.

Deep inside though, I feel more excited than anything else. The fact that Eren was able to somehow conjure a titan body and control it is incredible. Nothing we ever found out before even hinted at something like this being possible. In fact, it shouldn't be possible full stop. Did he somehow take over a titan's body? Is he actually some kind of titan himself? The idea that Eren could be a titan doesn't exactly make me feel comfortable. Titan or human he's still Eren Yeager and I suppose for now that will have to be enough.

I sigh and lean against one of the buildings. I've escaped from Trost but I feel like all I've managed to do is walk into another kind of hell. This one is silent and still, with nothing to do but wait to see how events pan out. With nothing you can do to affect their outcome. I slump down onto my haunches and stare at the cobbles. Idly I draw my right blade and hold it out in front of me, reflecting the sun off the steel in bright flashes.

"Matthias?" asks a sweet concerned voice. I turn my head to see Historia, looking at me with worry in her eyes.

"Hi Krista," I reply, my voice bland and dull with exhaustion.

"Are you okay?" she asks coming over and sitting down beside me.

"I'm not sure. I think so. Or at least I will be. What happened to you?"

"We were back with vanguard running messages when the order to recall came. We knew you guys didn't have enough gas to get back, so we thought we might be able to run some out to you. But they locked us down, said they weren't prepared to risk any more lives than they had too."

"Fair enough I suppose. I might have done the same in their position. I'm glad I won't have to find out." I notice she's still looking at me worriedly. "I'm sorry; I know I'm behaving rather gloomily for someone who just escaped out of one of the greatest death traps in the world. It's just, I feel like part of me did die back there you know?"

"Yeah, I know."

I look at her in surprise, "you do?"

"Of course," she says, nodding earnestly. "When you first see someone die, it changes you. Something inside of you breaks, and it never heals."

"This, this just doesn't feel right. People weren't meant to live like this, no one was meant to endure this kind of thing. But life doesn't seem to care all that much what we were meant to do does it?"

Historia shakes her head sadly. "No, life usually doesn't give us what it should. I suppose we just need to accept that and move on."

I look around to see if anyone nearby might be listening, but the only people close by have their focus trained on themselves. "You said you'd explain more later. Well Historia, it's later now."

She bites her lip nervously and clasps her hands. "I knew you'd bring that up. I suppose I owe it to you to tell you my whole story. My mother was a maid servant for the Reiss family. She never married."

"So, you're..."

"Yes. I'm a bastard, illegitimate, whatever you want to call it. I know it isn't that strange a thing among the noble houses, a lord having a child by a servant. But normally the child is either denied or adopted. Either way they're allowed to live their life without anything more than a black mark next to their name. In my case though, things weren't anywhere near as pleasant.

"My grandparents were the only ones who would even speak to me, and even then it was just to tell me what my chores were. My mother pretended that I didn't exist; she never even looked directly at me. I'd rather not go through the entire sorry story of my life if that's all right with you, but suffice to say my only friends were farm animals and I was never allowed to leave the tract of land to which I'd been 'assigned'.

"I never saw my father until, until five years ago. I don't really understand what it was all about, at least not completely. I was taken to see my father for the first time, and he had a big group of men with him. One of them cut my mother's throat and left her to bleed to death in the dirt. The last thing she said was that she wished I'd never been born.

"My, father," she continues, laying a high level of disgust on the word father, "told me that I had to change my name and become a soldier. A nice neat way to dispose of me I suppose. So, I took the name Krista Lenz, and I suppose you know the rest of my story."

I can't think what to say. I can understand some aspects of what she went through. I never had any friends and most adults didn't exactly treat me very well, but I'd always had my mother. I even had my father as well for a short time; though to be honest I'm not sure how much that counts. "I, I, I don't..." my voice trails off.

Historia looks at me. Her eyes have changed in the time she's been telling me her story. Those eyes that I always liked for their bright liveliness now look, dead. No, that's not the right word, hollow would be better. "I'm sorry," I eventually manage to say.

"Thanks I guess."

"I'm afraid you don't understand what I mean. I'm not saying sorry for what you had to live through-though I am sorry for that as well-I'm apologising for what I'm about to ask you. You've told me your past, now I'm asking you, who are you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Not a name, not a background, not a rank or a profession. I'm not asking what you are. I'm asking who you are."

Historia looks at me with her mouth open. I guess she didn't expect that kind of question. Then she looks away from me uncomfortably. "I'm not anyone really. Krista isn't who I am, she's just an idealised mask. It's like being away somewhere on holiday, your normal world and responsibilities don't exist. You can think that you live there, that you don't have those problems. But sooner or later, you have to go home. Then you realise it was all a nice little lie you told yourself, just to try and warm up your heart. The answer to your question Matthias, is nobody."

"I see. Well then, I'm going to give you some advice: change that. If you're nobody, then you have a blank canvas to work with. If you want to be kind, be kind. If want to be cruel, be cruel. Want to be brave, be brave. It's all up to you now as I see it." I plant my hands on my knees and push myself upright. "I know I don't understand what you went through, but I'm willing to try to. So I have one last question-and you don't have to answer it right now-do you want me to?" I offer her my hand to help back up to her feet. I'm conscious of the symbolism of this position, and I suppose I may have put her on the spot a little here. But the way I see it, she can either tell me she doesn't want me in her life, or she can let me try to help her. I personally would prefer the latter, because regardless of whom she turns out to be, I've already made my choice.

Historia looks up into my eyes, her hollow lenses capturing a stray ray of sunlight, holding it like a lamp. Then, something unexpected happens. Tears begin to well up in her eyes, and at the same time, a kind of life spreads through them, like water filling a basin. She reaches up and takes my hand, and I haul her to her feet. "I'll think about it," she says. She doesn't smile, but her eyes speak a level of gratitude I don't need to hear in her voice to recognise.

Suddenly the air is split by an echoing boom. I start and spin to see where the sound came from. 'That was cannon fire! Oh no, they wouldn't really do that would they?'

"What exactly do we tell the Brass about this?" asks Jean.

"I'm not sure," says Armin. "We can't hide the fact that Eren's titan form did appear and did kill many of the titans around HQ. So many people were witnesses. But as for Eren's seemingly magical titan power, I really have no idea."

"I think it's best if we tell them the truth," I say. "We're going to have to explain how exactly a soldier who was reported killed in the line of duty is still alive for starters."

Armin nods, "I'm afraid you may be right. Eren can't exactly make use of his titan powers if we keep the whole thing a secret can he?"

"Wait a moment!" exclaims Mikasa. "We don't know what they'll do with him!"

"Yes," I say, "but if we don't explain Eren may set off his powers by accident or something. Then where would we be?"

"Besides," adds Armin, "we might be able to retake Trost with Eren's help if he can figure this power out properly. He can't do that if we keep the power hidden."

"So we're telling command everything then?" asks Reiner.

We're all silent for a few moments, and then Armin and I nod. "It's probably the best thing for it," says Armin.

"I wonder what the Captain'll make of this," says Jean.

"Was that cannon fire?" I hear someone ask.

"No way, there's too much smoke," another answers.

"That doesn't look like smoke anyway. That looks like titan steam!"

As much as I hate to admit he's right. A huge plume of white vapour is rising from the edge of the town, where the senior officers have set up their HQ. "Son of a bitch!" I growl through gritted teeth, before running towards the nearest rooftop. I throw myself up onto the roof and start sprinting in the direction of the pillar of rising steam. "Don't you dare! Don't you freaking dare! Not after that!" I skid to a halt overlooking a wide courtyard. The huge plume of steam is rising from the far corner, up against the wall. It looks like there's some kind of shape inside of the steam. It's large, at least eight metres tall. It's surrounded by garrison soldiers with drawn blades. Captain Woerman seems to be watching over proceedings, arms hanging limply by his sides. On an outcropping from the Wall rests the cannon that must have fired the shot I just heard.

The steam begins to drift away, revealing a kind of red stringing substances wrapped around- "Oh." A bizarre half formed creature sits in the courtyard. It has no body bellow its ribcage, and most of that is uncovered bone. The left side of the 'corpse titan' is coated in blood red muscles with no skin, a smoking handless arm reaching up towards the cannon, presumably to block the incoming fire. The right side has a gaping hole in it instead of an arm. The head is mostly a bare skull, but some filaments of muscle cling the areas around the jaw and the back of the neck. The jaw hangs loose, attached by only a few threads of flesh. Only one eye rests inside of the skull, staring blankly straight ahead.

I barely hear the sound of other people landing behind me and don't bother to react. The thing's eye twitches in its socket, rolling up into its head. Suddenly there's a cracking and ripping noise, followed by a rush of steam that hides the half titan from view. "What the hell was that?" comes the cracking voice of Jean from behind me.

"I think that, was Eren," I whisper, my voice coated with both horror and awe. "That thing is like a rushed job, probably to stop the cannon fire."

"You mean Eren can control his powers?" asks Reiner.

"I guess so. That or he did on instinct."

"What do those guys think they're doing?" asks Jean.

"I suppose they're scared. I don't blame them really, imagine how you'd feel around someone who just showed that they could turn into a titan."

Everyone is silent after that, watching. 'What happens now? Mikasa and Armin should be in there somewhere. Assuming none of them have been killed, and Eren can get out of that thing, Mikasa is likely to try and make a break for it with him. I don't think that's going to work all that well though, there's nowhere to go except out into titan country. Dam it, we knew this was a risk but we'd hoped they might listen to reason.' My right hand strays towards my blade, my fingers slipping over the handle.

"Hey, Matty, easy there. Don't do anything stupid," cautions Reiner.

"We can't just stand here though!" I protest. "Once they reload that cannon they'll fire again. A titan body is pretty tough, but it won't stand up to many cannon shots. And Eren, Armin and Mikasa defiantly won't!"

"Just wait for a moment, okay? Let's see what happens."

I grip the handle even tighter, but I don't draw, not yet at least.

Suddenly there's a clattering noise from within the steam and a figure comes tearing out with its arms held over its head. It skids to a sudden halt and holds up both hands in a gesture of non-aggression. It's Armin. "Eren is not a foe of humanity!" he shouts "We're willing to cooperate with military command and share everything we've learned about his powers!"

"Your pleas fall on deaf ears!" bellows the Captain. "He has already revealed his true form! If you insist he's not an enemy of humanity show me proof, otherwise we'll blast him back to whatever nightmare he crawled out of!"

"You don't need any proof!"

'What? What's that supposed to mean?'

"The fact of the matter is, it doesn't matter what we perceive him to be!"

"Wait, what?"

"The reports say that dozens of soldiers saw him right? And those reports say that they saw him fighting other titans, and that means they him get swarmed and almost devoured by the titans as well! To put it plainly, the Titans saw Eren as they do any other human being: as their prey! And doesn't matter however else you may look at it that is an irrefutable fact!"

Total silence falls over the gathering as the soldiers take in this new revelation. 'Well, if that doesn't win them over I'm not sure anything will. Armin really does have that gift of putting things into perspective doesn't he?' I can remember all those times we argued in the past. We did for fun more than anything else, sometimes we didn't even disagree; one of us just picked the other side for the sake of the debate. It was not a common thing for me to come out the winner in those arguments, and I doubt the Captain can come out the winner in this one either.

Woerman looks desperately from left to right as his soldiers being to chatter amongst each other, a few even lowering their blades. Suddenly something seems to posses him. "Prepare to attack! Don't let yourselves be swayed by his cunning lies! The Titans' behaviour has always been beyond our comprehension, I wouldn't put it past them assume human form! He's speaking our language in an attempt deceive us! I refuse to allow this to continue any longer!"

'What?! That dumbass, what's wrong with him?'

Armin looks around in panic for a moment, unable to think what to say next. He glances back into the mist, which has now cleared to show a blackened and mostly dissolved titan corpse. Eren and Mikasa are crouching amongst the remains. As if affirmed by them somehow, Armin turns back to the soldiers surrounding him. "I am a soldier!" a cries, throwing himself into a salute. "And I have dedicated my heart to the restoration of humanity sir! Nothing can make me prouder than dying for such a noble cause! If we make use of Eren's titan ability, combined with what little manpower we have left we can retake this city! For humanity's glory, in what little time I have left to live, I will advocate his strategic value!"

'Come on! Listen to him you stupid old man! You can't seriously throw away a chance like this!'

A man by the Captain's side steps forwards, "sir, his words are worth listening to. Maybe we should consi-

"Quiet!" the Captain screams. He raises his arm to signal the cannon.

'No!' I draw both my blades and start sprinting towards the cannon's position, but I already know I'll never get there in time.

"That's enough!" says a gruff voice. I stop and turn to look back. A newcomer-a bald old man with a grey moustache- has grabbed the Captain's arm before he can lower it. My eyes widen at the red and gold sash around his torso.

"C-commander Pixis," stutters the Captain.

"I know I've only just arrived Captain Woerman, but I'm quite aware of our situation." Pixis smiles and looks at Armin. "Gather our reinforcements. I think we could at least do these young soldiers the favour of hearing them out, don't you?"


	11. Trost Part 7

Chapter 11: Trost Part 7: Working as Bait

"ATTENTION!" The booming voice of Commander Pixis prompts the crowd of nervous soldiers to turn towards the gateway. The Commander stands on top of the gate looking down at the mass of humanity milling through the town. Word has already been spreading that a plan is in the works to retake Trost. Most people aren't too happy about, and I can see why. Only a small handful of us know about Eren's titan ability, so to those not in the know it must seem like a pointless attempt. After all, I'm not even sure how exactly we're going to plug the hole in the gate even with Eren's help, to them it must seem like total lunacy.

"Take note!" continues the Commander, "our primary objective for recapturing Trost is to seal the hole in the gate. Yes you heard me right. What's more it will be done manually!"

"That's impossible," someone mutters, "we don't have the technology to pull off something like that!"

"As for how this monumental task will be accomplished, that's where this fellow comes in." The Commander gestures to someone behind him, who steps forwards so that everyone below can see him. "Allow me to introduce Cadet Eren Yeager. Do not let appearances deceive you; this young man is in fact the successful product of cutting edge science!"

'Science, right.'

"Cadet Yeager posses the ability to fabricate and control a titan body at will!"

Almost immediately I can hear people muttering. Clearly none of them believe what they're hearing. I probably wouldn't either if I hadn't seen Eren come out of the titan corpse myself.

"The strategy revolves around the large boulder not far from the gate. Having assumed titan form Cadet Yeager will hoist said boulder on his back, slap it to the hole and voila! Now this is where you all come in, your job will be to defend him. Yes, defend a titan against his own kind. If we are able to stave off the titans long enough, Trost's reclamation is guaranteed."

Silence falls over the assembled soldiers as the Commander finishes his briefing. Then people start to talk.

"Is he saying we finally have some kind of advantage?"

"A kid that small can lift a rock that big?"

"This is impossible, they're making it up!"

"They're lying to us! They just want us to throw away our lives so that they can gain status!"

'Dam, they're not going for it.' "No!" I cry out desperately, "it's true! Don't any of you remember the berserker titan that fought the others off and allowed us to retake HQ? That was Eren! I saw him come out of the titan body myself!"

This draws the attention of quite a few people, but nowhere near enough. "Why on earth should we believe you?"

"You could be leading us on just like them!"

"I'm not going back there, not back to that nightmare!"

People are already beginning to turn away, heading for the road away from Trost. 'Nonononono! We're so close to taking ground here, we can't afford for everything to fall apart now!'

"You traitors! I'll kill you where you stand!" yells the Captain Woerman. "Desertion is answered by death!"

'Oh good lord.'

"Anyone wishing to leave!" the Commander shouts from atop the gateway, "will by my personal order not be charged with treason! Anyone who has witnessed the horror of the Titans first hand will not be forced to experience it again! Additionally, anyone with friends and family who they do not care to spare from the same trauma may also leave!"

'That's a good play. The fact that he's right helps all the more. If too many people desert, the plan falls apart, the Titans break through and we all die.' The Commander's words thankfully have an effect on the mass of deserters, many of whom stop and turn back. The situation seems to be stabilising somewhat at least.

"Now, think back five years ago," he continues. "Specifically the operation to retake wall Maria. Officially it was labelled reconnaissance, but I don't doubt you all saw it for what it was: a poorly disguised exercise in population control! We all knew this in our hearts, but we accepted the state sponsored myth because the deaths of our fellow human beings allowed us to survive!"

"But now we are on the verge of a repeat of the same situation. Should Wall Rose fall the lands within Wall Sina would not support half the population now living. If mankind is whipped off the face of the earth it won't be the titans that do it. No, we'll have done it to ourselves, fighting over the last scraps of land and food. If the line isn't drawn now it won't be drawn at all. If we must die, let us die here!"

There is a moment of silence as everyone contemplates the situation. Eventually we are dismissed and the officers are called away to receive their orders. "We're actually going to do it?" asks someone, "we're actually going to retake Trost?"

'Yes. Yes we are. All I really want right now is just to lie down and sleep in peace. But that cannot happen until we're finished here. This has been one hell of a day, and it still isn't over yet!'

"I can't say decoy duty is all that appealing!" I call out to Armin.

"Well it's better than having to go straight in after them!" he calls back.

We're both hanging off of the top of the wall by our cables, about thirty metres above the ground. I look down and can't help shuddering. The space below us is filled by a huge crowd of bloated and shrivelled flesh, capped at intervals by wide mouths. The constant groaning of the massive swarm feels like it's working its way into my brain. Just beneath me I can see a pawing hand, less than ten metres away. It belongs to a titan with a permanent grin etched into its face by a bizarre lack of lips. Its gums are left exposed to the air, leading to a wide smile when combined with a line of teeth that literally stretches from ear to ear.

I visualise my cables giving way, and I shiver. Suddenly I hear a scream from away to my right and look up just in time to see a soldier with light brown hair plummeting down towards the ground, his cables having indeed broken away from the Wall. He turns once in the air, before falling head first straight into a titan's jaws. The giant humanoid snaps its mouth shut, slicing off the unfortunate man's legs which fall away towards the ground. Blood sprays over the titan's lips, and I feel like vomiting as it swallows.

I look back at Armin. His eyes are filled with horror, but he swallows nervously and turns to look back up at the top of the Wall. I do the same hurriedly, shutting my eyes in an effort to ignore the sound of the titans' groping.

We're taking the hanging position in shifts, soldiers rotating point every ten minutes or so. The soldiers on the Wall help to keep the titans in place, while various teams draw the titans in towards the corner itself. The idea of using the greater part of the army as bait to clear the way for Eren was Armin's and whilst it's a good idea, I personally find it less comfortable than open combat. I haven't been on patrol duty yet, but I'm scheduled to take it after this shift on the Wall.

The seconds and minutes blur together into one as I hang, limply from the Wall. Eren and a sizable force of Garrison elites have already set out, heading for the gate via the top of the Wall. The only thing that worries me about this plan is that elites in the Garrison Regiment aren't what would be considered elites in the other two regiments. The Garrison has always had a bad name as far as skill goes. Some people call them the dregs of the military, which I suppose in some ways they are. The Military Police are exclusively those soldiers that were able to perform to a certain level, making them reasonably skilled be default. The Scout Regiment is of course the most elite force out of all three, purely out necessity and regular gruelling experience. For a soldier to survive multiple missions they have to be of a fairly high calibre. The Garrison however, is both inexperienced and has none of the elite 'top tens' from the various Cadet Corps.

Eventually the signal is given for those on Wall shift to pull themselves back up. Most people are relieved to get back up onto the Wall and to safety, but I'm about to attempt something even more hairy. Patrol duty is far more hazardous than Wall duty.

I'm assigned to a squad composed fully of soldiers from the Garrison Regiment, no other trainees here. We descend down into the city and start making a curve around the large mass of titans in one corner; we don't want to draw any of them away by mistake. Heading out into the streets, we make our way towards the centre of the city to try and pick up any titans that haven't already headed for the large mass of soldiers grouped up in the north west corner.

"Hey," says one of the soldiers, a blonde young man about three years my senior. "I heard you know that Yeager kid, the one who's supposed to be able to turn into a titan."

"Yes," I answer cautiously. "I was in his squad."

"So, you know him personally?"

"Yes."

"Tell me, is it actually true? The whole titan thing."

I hesitate over answering, noticing that all the rest of the squad have turned to look at me, even the corporal, who should be quieting any talking in the ranks. "Yes, it's true. I saw him come out a titan body during the first stage of the battle. I also saw him fighting in his titan form as well."

"Wow," the man shakes his head in disbelief. "Do you think he can seal the gate?"

"In all honesty I have no idea. I know he'll try, but whether or not his titan form will be strong enough to move that rock, I really don't know."

As if to emphasise my words, there's a faraway cracking noise, and a red smoke trail soars up into the air. "What the hell? What does that mean?" asks another soldier, a woman with short dark hair.

"It means that the elite squad's having trouble," answers the corporal. "It's none of our business what's going on over there; concentrate on doing your job."

'What could possibly have gone wrong?' I wonder. 'Did Eren fail to transform?'

"Soldier!" barks the corporal at me, drawing my attention away from the pillar of red smoke. "Eyes front!"

"Yes sir!"

'It isn't my part to get involved. I'm a soldier and I have to follow orders. Besides, I have confidence in Eren and Mikasa. They can handle themselves. At least I hope so.'

Suddenly a fourteen metre titan looms up out of an alleyway in front of us. It must have been crouching for some reason, so we didn't see it until just now. The titan swings its hand forwards in a wide sweep of the roof. I can't think what else to do, so I fire my grapples straight ahead and pull myself out of the way. Straight towards the titan's face. I'm so rushed I can't make any sort of landing, slamming straight into the giant's forehead. 'Dam this thing's skull is like a brick wall!' I don't have time to try and pull off something clever; I'm too close to the titan. I let myself drop straight down past the titan's grasping arms towards the ground. Turning in midair I fire into the titan's left arm using it as a point to swing from.

Disconnecting my cables neatly I fire again to carry myself safely to the other side of the street, having swung under the titan's arm and across the road. I land firmly, though it jars me a little. Looking back, I can see that the rest of my squad wasn't anywhere near as lucky as I was. Three of them were crushed by the titan's initial swing, another was sent flying over the edge of the building, and lies in a crumpled heap on the pavement. The fifth has managed to scramble backwards away from the monster's grasp, but they're on their back, attempting to crawl away as the titan reaches out for them.

'Oh well, I've been lucky so far. Here's to one more mark on the right!' I fire both hooks into the peak of the roof behind the titan. Since it's at a higher angle than me I'm able to throw myself up above the titan by disconnecting my grapples halfway across. I fire again, this time at the titan's exposed neck. The last survivor has already been seized in the titan's right hand; this is going to be my only shot to pull this off. Hurtling down I draw back for a swing. Last time I tried this mauver I screwed it up. I was able to recover the situation afterwards then but I won't be able to now.

My blades arc downwards, the tips meeting the titan's flesh on the far left of its neck. They drive their way through, the razor sharp edges moving easily through the thick flesh. I widen the cut as I reach the centre of the nape by angling my wrists slightly, then bring both tips back together again as my blades exit the wound. Blood spurts and pieces of loose flesh go flying, but the titan doesn't fall. My cut was too shallow.

I land with a crash bruising myself all along my right side. "No, please no!" screams the last surviving soldier, as the titan's jaws snap shut around him. I failed.

Suddenly the same white light that overwhelmed me before in the supply room floods my vision, and this time takes all the feeling in my body as well. That sense of failure washes over me, fills me and then seems to drown me. "You stupid brat! You've failed us all!"

'Whose voice is that?'

"It was one moment, only one! He knows, he knows now and it is all because of you!"

The voice is male, elderly and high pitched with terror. Something about it makes me shake inside. The fear in it sounds all too familiar. The sound of someone who knows that they're doomed, that their demise is now inevitable. Then images start coming. Something on fire. It looks like a building of some kind with a domed roof. A woman screaming, being restrained by a man in a hooded robe. A mass of people running and pointing up at something behind them. A forest filled with dark fir trees. Another woman, younger with blonde hair and a look of terror and incomprehension in her eyes. Then mountains covered in snow, with a wind so cold it feels as if my blood is freezing in my veins. Then falling, down, down, down into blackness.

At last after what seems like an eternity of total darkness and silence, I hear a voice. "It's a child Andrew not a monster!"

'Wait, that's mom!'

"I know what he is Madeline! Better than you ever will!"

'Dad?'

"What does that even mean? It doesn't matter where he came from we can't just leave him out here!"

"Out where?" I ask. "Mom, where are you? Where am I?"

My father gives a long sigh, "I know. Here, wrap him in my coat; it's too cold out here for someone his age."

"What age? Dad what's going on?"

Then the white light from before rushes over me again. This time I feel myself rising, flying upwards so fast it makes me want to be sick. Then with a hard jolt, I'm on the roof top where I landed again. Slowly I push myself up onto one arm. The titan is gone, and all that's left of my squad is broken bodies. The sun is dipping low over the Walls behind me. 'How late is it? How long was I out for?' The wind whistles in cold against me, carrying the chill of the night air.

"So much for trusting to luck," I mutter bitterly. "That man, he died because I couldn't perform the most core act of all my duties. I couldn't manage to kill that titan!" 'Why am I talking out loud to myself? I need to get of this place, find out what's going on.'

Suddenly the stillness of the air is broken by the sound of cannon fire. I turn to see the bright flashes of artillery firing down from the Walls. The light illuminates the groping forms of hundreds of titans, still gathered in the far corner of the city. 'They're picking the Titans off. Does that mean the operation was a success?' The wind blasts me again from behind, prompting me to wrap my arms around myself in an effort to keep out the cold. 'I have to go, I have to move.' But part of me just doesn't want to. I failed to kill that titan, and that soldier lost his life as a result. I didn't need to go for the killing blow. I could have-no, I should have-just cut the tendons supporting its arm. The man would have been free and we could have at least gotten away. 'But no, you had to go and try to pull off an attack you've never been able to get right. Not in the field or even in training. Matthias you stupid fool!'

I slump onto my knees and put my hand to my temple. 'Why does it feel all sticky?' I lower my hand and see that it's covered in dark red blood. 'No wonder I feel so dizzy. I must have cracked my head open when I fell. At least I didn't puncture an artery or something; otherwise I wouldn't be here anymore.' Darkness is beginning to play at the edges of my vision, my own heart beat heavy in my ears. My eyelids droop. 'No, I can't sleep now. I have to get back, have to find out...'

"Did, did we win?" I ask no one in particular, before totally collapsing into unconsciousness.


	12. Trost Part 8

Chapter 12: Trost Part 8: Aftermath

I'm awakened by the light of the early morning sun. I let out a long involuntary groan as I push myself to my feet. My head is throbbing and my limbs feel stiff from spending the night in an uncomfortable position. I put a hand to my head tenderly to check my wound. The blood still coats my forehead thickly, but it's dry now. I still feel a little dizzy, after a few minutes though that goes. 'I have to get back to the Wall. I can't stay here any longer; it's a miracle a titan didn't find me.' To my surprise the cannons are still firing, the great echoing booms sending shudders through the building beneath me.

I stretch myself, shake my head and step off the roof. I still have plenty of gas since I was in action for a rather short time, so I'm not worried about that. What I am worried about is what exactly happened yesterday. The cannons must have been firing all night so that would imply that the operation was a success. I could be misreading the situation though. Pulling myself up to the highest point in can see nearby, I turn to look back at the gate of Trost. I feel like shouting with excitement at the sight that greets me.

The gate has been plugged by a large boulder, which has been rammed into place so hard that the stone around it has cracked. A giant net has been thrown over it from the top of the gate and I can see soldiers patrolling the top of the wall. 'We did it. We won. So, what now I wonder?' I stand in silence for a few moments, contemplating the fact that in the end we did it. Eren stopped up the hole. 'Anyway, for now at least I need to get back to the Wall.'

"Hey you!" shouts a voice from bellow. I turn to see a man in a soldier's uniform swinging up towards my roof top. He has a green cloak wrapped around his shoulders. My eyes widen as I see the symbol on his uniform. A pair of wings on the usual backdrop, one blue one white. 'The Wings of Freedom' Eren had always said they were called. This man is with the Scout Regiment! "What are you doing just standing around here?" he demands upon landing. "Wait a second, you're one of the Cadets aren't you? You're not supposed to be on deployment yet; they're giving you a short rest period this morning."

I salute, "Matthias Quinn from the 104th Cadet Corps Squad 34, temporarily assigned to Garrison Squad 69. I was part of the recovery operation yesterday. I was knocked unconscious during an engagement in which all my squad mates were killed. I'm afraid I only just came around a few minutes ago."

"In that case you're lucky to be alive. It would explain the head injury I guess. Well you'll be pleased to hear the operation was a success and Trost has been retaken for the most part. We're in the process of eliminating the last titans remaining within the city walls. I suggest you head back in for debriefing. I will be checking your story however."

"Of course sir."

"Now get out of here. You kids have earned a rest after the hell you've been through."

"Thank you sir," I nod and take off back towards Wall Rose. Since I keep moving the people I meet don't seem to pay me much attention, though just before I reach the Walls I'm stopped by a Garrison sergeant and have to explain my position again. He nods understandingly when I tell him I was with Squad 69; I suppose they must have been registered MIA. He tells me to find administrative centre so that my name can be registered as active.

Once I'm over the Wall I start asking around for where the administrative centre is, and I'm pointed in the direction of a two story building that looks like it was a shop of some kind in another life. Inside a pair of Garrison soldiers are standing behind a counter, one filling out paper work and the other flipping through a book of some kind. When I enter she looks up. "Hi there Cadet. You have anything to report?"

"Yes, I'm here to report in that I'm no longer MIA."

"Oh?"

"Matthias Quinn assigned to Squad 69. I was knocked unconscious during the battle yesterday and regained consciousness about twenty minutes ago."

"Squad 69," the woman runs her eye down a ledger, following the point with her finger. "Ah here it is. All members Missing In Action as of seventeen hundred hours. Yes I do see your name here. It's a simple matter of changing the mark. And may I ask about the rest of your squad?"

"Dead," I reply, staring straight at the ground.

"I'm sorry. Can you confirm all of their deaths?"

"Four of them were crushed and limp when I fell unconscious and they were still there when I recovered. The fifth was eaten alive. Is that sufficient conformation?" It's only after I've said it that I realise that that probably sounded sarcastic. "Uh, sorry. That came out wrong."

"No it's fine. Thank you for giving us that information soldier. Might I suggest a visit to the field hospital next?"

"Yes sir thank you," I turn on my heel and leave the room.

After a little more asking around I find the field hospital. One of the nurses there tells me that while I lost a lot of blood yesterday, I should recover just fine. My wound is cleaned and bandaged and I'm sent on my way with a note put in that I shouldn't participate in any field activities for the rest of the day. "Normally we'd give you a longer period of recovery," apologises the nurse. "But we need every able body we can get. Just go report in at the field barracks and get some rest. Since all of the cadets have been given a few hours of rest this morning, you should be able to catch up with your friends. I dare say they'll be glad to find out you're all right."

"I should hope so," I reply with a grin before leaving.

The Barracks is a series of tents set up in the fields around a nearby farm house which is being used as a central administrative hub. I'm sent to the northern side where the cadets are being housed. As I approach I can hear people talking, some laughing, some gloomy. There are a few people around, none of whom I'm particularly familiar with. They all greet me and provide some variation on "glad you're not dead." After about half an hour I start to feel dizzy and lean against a fence post.

For the first time I decide to let myself think about what happened yesterday. I know that that man's death is my fault, if I'd thought more clearly and taken a more rational course of action, I might have been able to save him. What's done is done however; I can't afford to let myself get bogged down by guilt. Still, I won't forget this. My mistake can serve as a warning to myself, to make sure that I don't make the same one twice. The thing that really occupies my thoughts is what happened after I landed.

I've always had weird dreams I know that much. And every now and again I'd get this really strong sense that I'd been somewhere before even though I hadn't, but everyone gets that. After a while I've learned to live with the dreams. And I don't always have them now days either, which has made my life much easier. Sometimes I still wake up tasting blood, covered in sweat or on a few occasions actually screaming. I've learned to deal with it and move on, let the night time fears fade away into the background. It helps that I never clearly remember them.

The last year or so however, aspects of those dreams have stayed in my mind. Now I can remember faces, smells, a sense of falling or of at least being very high up. The most common thing I remember though is the Titans. They seem to be in every one of my nightmares, weaving their way through my subconscious like a virus. I can never escape from their groping hands, wide jaws and dead eyes. Sometimes I can see them, sometimes I can't. But even when I don't remember seeing them, I always know that they were there.

The two flashes I had yesterday though were something else entirely. They were like memories, things that must have happened before my accident, except that none of them make any sense. A girl, a house, burning buildings, running people and my parents. I feel almost certain that they were talking about me. But why would they be saying things like that? "This doesn't make any sense!" I mutter angrily under my breath. Perhaps I should find mom when the chance comes, talk to her about this. I don't know when, or even if that chance is ever going to come however.

'What exactly was it that they said? Something about being a child and not being a, a, a something. Dam it! Why is everything so hazy? My mother said that though, I know that much. Then my father said that he knew that and that he knew that more than she did, whatever that's supposed to mean. My mother argued with him about me, not sure why though. I think Dad sort of gave up in the end, and there was something about a coat and my age I think. How old was I at the time I wonder? I sincerely don't like what this seems to be implying though.' Deliberately, I discontinue the thought. 'I can worry about it some other time,' I reason. In truth though, I intend to push it as far back in my mind as I possibly can so I can't look at it again.

I stand up straight and look around me. Behind me in a field there are a pair of cadets talking. I don't recognise them, but further away leaning against and sitting under a tree are Armin and Mikasa. I clamber over the fence a little unsteadily and call out to them. "Armin, Mikasa!" Armin looks up at me surprised then sits bolt upright when he realises it's me. Scrambling to his feet he runs over.

"Matthias, you're alive!" he exclaims.

"As far as I'm aware," I reply with a smile.

"What happened to you?" asks Mikasa. "We were told your entire squad was MIA."

"That's been changed now. They're all KIA."

"How?" asks Armin in shock.

"It happened a few moments after the elite squad sent up the red flare. A fifteen metre class had been crouching in the alleyway in front of us for some reason. It stood up and took a wide swing at us. Three of the squad were crushed, another was knocked off the roof and fell to his death. The fifth one," I fall silent for a moment. "The fifth one was my fault. I was able to get clear by pulling myself right into the titan's face, dropping and swinging under its arm. The other man who was still alive was grabbed. I had a clear shot at the nape and I messed up the death blow. My cut was too shallow, just like how it often was in training."

"Matthias," says Armin, putting a hand on my shoulder. "You can't blame yourself for that. You tried didn't you?"

"Yes, but I failed. Besides I didn't need to go for the death blow, I could have just immobilised the titan's arm or something. I was overconfident and that lost a man his life. I just have to learn from this, I suppose."

"The world is a cruel place," says Mikasa flatly.

"Yeah, very," I agree, thinking of Historia's miserable life story.

"But what happened then?" asks Armin. "Did you take the titan out or something?"

"No, I wish could say that I managed to at least avenge those men, but I hit my head and went into a, delirium for want of a better word."

"Delirium?"

"Do you remember how when I was a child I had an accident and lost my memory?" Armin nods. "Well, I can assume that I'm remembering. It was very strange. I'm afraid I really can't understand much if any of it. I wouldn't be all that confused by it, if it wasn't for..." my voice trails off. That first voice, the one that came before all the images. It told me that I'd failed everyone. How, what did I do? And who exactly was it that knew, and what did they know? "Sorry," I mutter coming back to myself. "It's all a bit disorienting. I can worry about it later. What happened to you guys? From the looks of the gate the plan worked."

"Yes," agrees Armin, "but it didn't exactly go flawlessly."

Over the next half an hour the two of them explain how Eren seemed to initially lose control of his titan form and attempted to crush Mikasa. He then proceeded to knock himself out by punching himself in the face. That sounds rather more comic when I put it like that I suppose. That changed the situation from an attempt to retake Trost to an attempt to recover Eren. Armin arrived in the middle of the ensuing battle with one of many waves of titans that seemed to be coming out of nowhere. He was able to get through to Eren by running his sword through the far side of the weak spot, stabbing him in the arm.

Eventually they were able to get Eren on his feet, after which point he became determined to see the original plan through. Thanks to the sacrifice of many of the Garrison soldiers, Eren was able to plug the gate. It wasn't long after that that the Scout Regiment returned. With their help the Garrison Regiment was clearing the city of Trost of those titans trapped inside. Even from back here we could still hear the wall-mounted cannons firing.

"But where's Eren?" I ask. "Is he all right?"

"They took him into custody," explains Armin with a worried look. "Even after all of this they're still afraid of what he might do. I can understand that really."

"It's stupid!" retorts Mikasa. "He risked his life to block the gate and yet they still don't trust him!"

"It's not only a question of trust Mikasa. Eren doesn't understand how his powers work. I'm afraid that right now, somewhere secure may be the safest place for him. For his sake as well as others."

"So, what happens now?" I ask.

Armin sighs. "We wait and finish the cleanup operation in Trost. After that we've got a few days where nothing much is likely to be happening. I suppose that will be time to properly get to grips with the situation. Then we make our choice, the one that will determine the rest of our lives. We choose which regiment to join."


	13. A Side Note on the Future

**A side note:**

 **With the completion of the Trost arc I figured I should probably take a moment to explain just where I'm hoping to go with this story. It might have been better to have mentioned this at the start, but I didn't, so I might just as well go over it now.**

 **Humanity's Cage is the first of what I'm expecting to be around four installments. This particular one will at the current count contain 22 chapters, but this may decrease or increase if I feel that a chapter is too much of a drag, or that I need another one in order to cover some more events. This installment will also be sticking faithfully to the events of Season 1 of the Anime, and will end in roughly the same place that it did. Major new events will not start rolling out until about half way into the second installment: Humanity's Strength. Things will start to become different before then, but the end results of those events will likely still be the same.**

 **The second volume's end point is equivalent to roughly Chapter 68 of the Manga. This is equivalent in events, not in time. The Armoured Titan arc will still take place, however all other events in the time frame are far more shall we say, flexible. The third volume is Humanity's Freedom (working title) and will be totally and utterly composed of events that are disconnected from the manga and anime. If any events are revealed to be similar (once the manga is released up to that point) then it will not be by design, as I'm not actually reading the manga as it is released. The fourth and final installment is Humanity's Victory, and will most defiantly be totally original in nature, since it revolves around an origin story that I have created myself.**

 **After the current Chapter there will be two others before the start of the 57th Recon Mission arc, after which the Volume will be completed with the Stohess arc. Once this volume is completed I will probably leave a gap between the release of the final chapter and the publishing of Humanity's Strength. This may be around a week in length, possibly longer if my interests stray in that time (I am doing this for fun after all). Also, if anyone has any complaints/suggestions, I'm more than happy to hear them so long as they're constructive. Thank you to everyone who reads this story and I hope you have enjoyed it and will continue to do so.**


	14. Night of Descisions

Chapter 13: Night of Decisions

The faint smell of ash still lingers on the night air. We've been burning bodies here every night for the past five days, ever since the Battle Trost. Every night more dead comrades are cremated rather than buried, in order to stop the potential spread of disease. Tonight was the last lot though, at least for us it will be. Tonight is our real last night as cadets. Tonight, we choose which regiment to join.

Ignoring the events surrounding the Battle itself, these last few days have still been highly eventful. Only two days after retaking Trost Eren was put on trial. I wasn't called in to serve as a witness, but my report on Eren's actions as the Berserker Titan was taken into consideration along with dozens of others. To be honest I doubt it made all that much difference really. It was just another voice telling the same old story. Armin and Mikasa were however called as witnesses since they were present on both occasions when Eren used his titan power.

Armin gave me a general run down of events. The Military Police were the closest thing to a prosecution and the Scout Regiment took up the role of the defence. "Though really," Armin had sighed, "Eren's position wasn't really taken into consideration. So technically there was no prosecution or defence." The Military Police claimed that Eren's mere existence was causing an upheaval within the populace, and that for the good of humanity he ought to be 'studied carefully', before he was made a fallen warrior of humanity. This in so many words, meant that they wanted to dissect him in some laboratory somewhere, and keep his very existence as quiet as possible.

The Scout Regiment proposed a far more, desirable option. Eren was to be drafted into the Scout Regiment, where they would make use of his titan power to retake Wall Maria. Needless to say this was Eren's preferred option. The Military Police's position did have a powerful supporter in the form of the Wall Cult, who claim Eren is a demon of some kind who must be destroyed in order to restore the purity of the Walls. The fact that they were able to even get a word in is worrying. The Cult has been gaining power steadily since the fall of Wall Maria. People are afraid so they turn to a nonsensical belief that a network of man-made structures are somehow deities. At least in other belief systems they actually believe in something that makes some sense.

Eren's position was compromised when Mikasa attempted to give a testimony saying that Eren had saved her life twice during the Battle of Trost using his titan power. Whilst this was true, her testimony was invalidated on the grounds that personal feelings played too great a role in her view on events. In fact, this was steered into a weapon against Eren, when the matter of Mikasa's kidnapping and rescue was brought to light. I've heard the story a few times from different people including Eren himself.

Mikasa's parents were murdered by a trio of kidnappers who wanted to sell her and her mother into sexual slavery. Her mother was killed during the struggle however, so Mikasa was orphaned. Eren rescued her by surprising the kidnapers and stabbing two of them to death. When the third appeared he attempted to choke Eren to death, but Mikasa saved him by stabbing that third man from behind.

Needless to say that the violent nature of the act didn't go down well with the court. In fact, some people even tried to claim that since Mikasa attempted to defend Eren, it was likely that she was a titan spy also.

Fortunately, the situation was resolved when Captain Levi proceeded to kick Eren ruthlessly in the head several times after an outburst on Eren's part. When told to step away on the ground that Eren might transform into a titan, Levi reasoned that if the Military Police were planning to dissect Eren they would likely have to face a similar problem. He stated that since he was the most skilled soldier in the human race (a fact that no one is disputing), he was the one most likely to be able to kill Eren should he go rouge. Commander Erwin-the Leader of the Scout Regiment-proposed that Eren be put under the custody of Captain Levi, and be given the opportunity to prove himself in an upcoming mission outside of the Walls. The mission would provide a kind of test run to determine Eren's allegiance and capabilities.

Thankfully the Premier ruled favour of the Scouts.

After that I expected the situation to settle down until tonight, but I was very mistaken. Only one day after Eren's trial, Jean dropped rather a sever bomb on us all during dinner. "Marco's dead," he announced in a dull voice. Everyone fell silent at that. Connie had told him that that wasn't a particularly funny joke, to which Jean said he wished it was a joke. He apparently found what was left of his body slumped in a back street. He had been alone when he died, so no one could even tell us how it happened.

That shattered the good mood we'd all gained from Eren's release into the Scout Regiment. It seems to have had a profound effect on Jean. Profound to the point where, that very night he announced his intention of joining the Scouts. Everyone's been shaken an awful lot by that. Personally I couldn't believe it; Jean's always talked about how his main desire was to join the Military Police. He scoffed countless times at Eren's determination to join the Survey Corps, telling him that he was suicidal.

Most of the others seem to be having an awful lot of doubts about what to do next. Armin, Mikasa and myself still haven't changed our minds about the Scouts. It turns my stomach upside down to think about going out Titan Country to face them though. Annie claims not to have had a second thought about joining the MPs and Reiner has expressed a strong desire to join the Scout Regiment. I've begged Historia not to consider joining the Scouts, but I can tell I'm not going to sway her on this. As for Connie, Sasha and Bertolt, I really have no idea.

Things only got worse after this terrible piece of news.

During the cleanup operation, the Survey Corps had managed to capture two of the smaller titans alive as test subjects. Living titan test subjects are a rarity due to immense difficultly involved in capturing one, not to mention the number of lives that must usually be risked. This made the two titans incredibly valuable. Testing only lasted one day though. Four days after the Battle of Trost, the two titans were found smoking skeletons in the courtyard where they had been restrained.

From what an examination of the collapsing remains could reveal, the titans' napes were cut by someone performing a precision ODM strike from one side of the courtyard to the other. That narrowed it down to a soldier at least. It was a surprise for many that the Cadets were the ones who fell immediately under suspicion. All of us had to parade and have out gear inspected. Everyone checked out as having not used it since the end of the cleanup operation. Armin went away with a pained look in his eyes though; I think he knows something I don't.

And now, after all that here we are. One hundred and thirty five of the original 104th Cadet Corps are paraded under the moonlight sky. Stations have been set up in order to receive cadets who wish to transfer into the various Regiments. We've already be spoken to by a speaker from the Garrison Regiment who outlined the immense importance of having a strong defence against the Titans. He informed us of the unpleasant fact that over a thousand men and women had perished during the Battle of Trost from Garrison Regiment and that they hoped to fill many of these spaces with fresh recruits from the cadets. I can see the importance of the Garrison; they're going to be the ones who have to go into battle first should the Walls be attacked. However, I have no intention of changing my position. Mankind can't spend the rest of its existence behind walls. We have to fight back, and the only way to do that is through the Scouts.

Commander Erwin stands before us on stage with two Scouts flanking him at the rear. "I'm Erwin Smith, Commander of the Scout Regiment as known as the Survey Corps," he begins. "Now let's cut to the chase here: the Scouts need you, we need all the warm bodies we can get. After the recent titan attack, you now know the horrors of which they are capable as well as the limits of your own abilities. However, this battles aftermath gave Humanity a new chance for victory. I refer to Eren Yeager. He has already selflessly proven his loyalty to Humanity.

"But there's more than that. Eren did not just help to deter the Titan invasion; he's offered us a way to learn the secret of their origins. Intel suggests that the cellar of Yeager's home in Shiganshina will provide us with this secret. We intend to mount an expedition to secure this information."

There's a great muttering amongst the cadets as he says this. 'Hold on,' I wonder, 'isn't he jumping the gun a little bit here? Surely this isn't information he can afford to disclose to mere privates is it?' I already knew about the cellar of course-Eren told me himself-but I never expected this.

"Before we can reach the aforementioned cellar in Shiganshina we must retake Wall Maria," continues the Commander. "Of course this is easier said than done. Since the Gate of Trost has been rendered inaccessible further operations must be mounted from the Karanese District. This means that the battalion route we've spent the last four years creating is now useless.

"In the course of those four years we've incurred losses in excess of 60%. 60% in four years, that's a horrifying figure. In one month's time we plan to mount an expedition outside the Walls. Cadets from within your ranks will be expected to participate. I estimate a third of them will die. In a few years most will be dead. But those who endure will be amongst the most capable soldiers alive.

"Having heard this dismal state of affairs those who still wish to join remain here. But first ask yourself: can you give your heart, can you give everything for Humanity!"

Everyone stares at the Commander in horror. I'd always known that mortality rates within the Scouts were high, but hearing from the Commander's own lips, it just carries more weight. I find myself shaking slightly. "That is all; those wanting to join other regiments are dismissed."

Almost straight away, cadets begin to turn around and leave. At first it's a trickle, then a rush and finally a flood. 'There's so many of them leaving! After everything can't they see what we need to do? Though I suppose it's because of what we've seen that they can't bear to stay.' Suddenly I begin flashing back to images from the Battle of Trost. Eren beginning devoured, Nac being crushed to death, squad 69 crushed and devoured, the broken remains of countless soldiers lying in the streets, the foul smell of blood, the sound of people screaming their last breath and them. The Titans. 'Dam them, dam them all to hell! I won't back down now, I can't. I'm not afraid of them, I won't be afraid of them!' "I, I am not afraid you!" I hiss under my breath. "I won't run, I won't scream, I won't hide. To hell with hiding, to hell with running! I'm going to fight!"

More and more people stream past me and I try to look for someone, anyone who isn't leaving. I can't see past the lines of people though. That's assuming anyone is staying. 'What if I do leave? What happens then? If were to join the MPs I suppose I wouldn't do much at all. I'd try to make some kind of a difference. But what good could I possibly do there besides giving myself a few more years to live? And that Garrison? I'd just be waiting for the Titans to come and get me. No, this is the only way! The only way...'

Finally the last few people walk past, leaving behind only those who have chosen to remain in the scouts. I look around and feel like laughing and crying at the same time. Everyone except for Annie is here! Historia, Armin, Mikasa, Jean, Connie, Sasha, Reiner, Bertolt even Ymir! As I look into their eyes I can see they're all completely terrified, just like me. They are all resigned as well though; I don't think anything could change their minds now. "I want to go home," I hear Sasha whimper, but she doesn't move. In the end I can't help myself: I smile. I don't know why but the fact that everyone is here just makes me feel happy. 'The MP's are only going to be getting one recruit tonight. I'll bet that confuses them.'

As it becomes clear that none of us are leaving, Erwin steps back to centre stage. "If someone ordered you to die could you do it?" he asks.

"We don't want to die, sir!" responds Jean.

Erwin smiles, "of course not. You have each conquered your fear today. For that each and every one of you has my utmost respect. This is genuine salute soldiers!" He brings his fist up to his chest, and all of us mirror his action.

After this we're lead to a station by one of the Scouts to fill out our details. She's a young woman with a beautiful shade of light red hair and amber eyes. "Well done all of you," she says smiling. "Not everyone can find the courage to do what you just did. Especially after what you've seen."

"Thank you," I say. "I think I speak for all of us when I say that what we saw at Trost was the very thing that took away any sort of choice for us." Everyone nods sternly. The woman nods back in agreement and starts having us give our details to be written up.

As I walk away afterwards to spend my last night in the Trost Barracks I feel more resigned than ever before. Terror is coursing through me like my own blood, but I don't feel as if I could have done anything else. I'm content to go to this fate. I think I might even be content to die for Mankind. Though as Jean said, I don't want to die. And you know what? I don't intend to. I'm a Scout now; one of Humanity's greatest warriors. Those titans can go to hell!


	15. The Scout Regiment

Chapter 14: The Scout Regiment

The bright sun is framed perfectly by a blue almost cloudless sky. The air is cool and refreshing after the long ride here and the trees and grass provide an almost radiant atmosphere. Despite the unpleasant reality of our world I find moments and places like these a very welcome source of relief. I smile, taking a long breath as we slow the horses' pace to a canter. "I've always loved places like this," I say turning slightly in the saddle to face Historia who's a few steps behind me. "They have a kind of permanent feeling which I take comfort in. It's the idea that no matter what happens nothing can destroy nature."

"I know what you mean," she replies. "Some people say that the earth is like a being all on its own. It lets us live on it, thus you can never truly say someone owns any part of the world. You belong to it not the other way around."

"Not sure how I feel about that idea. I mean some pets act a bit like they own us not the other way around. It seems more likely that the very concept of ownership is illusionary though. A person owns nothing but their own soul I suppose." I ride silently for a few moments before speaking again. "I read in an old book at one point that the entire world was made by a single all powerful god of some kind. He's supposed to then technically own everything as a result of that. Apparently a lot of people believed that before the Titans came."

"Yeah, I've heard about that too. There were these three big groups weren't there? The Christians, the Muslims and, and the other one I can't remember."

"The Jews. To be honest I can't understand the major differences they had. I mean, I know there were some, but they all believed in the one concept didn't they? Why couldn't they just cooperate?"

"I suppose when it comes down to the fate of your immortal soul, there isn't much room for compromise."

"Guess not. I hear there are still groups who practice the various faiths in a few places. I wonder why they aren't declared taboo."

"Perhaps they were, but the people who followed them just didn't care. I don't think I would."

"Makes sense I guess. I'd love to be able to meet someone from the time before the Titans. The world must have seemed so much bigger! They weren't confined to any pen or cage like we are."

"I doubt you'll ever get the chance to do that," she laughs. "Not unless you have some way to travel through time!"

Her laughter involuntarily brings a smile to my face. Historia's been more cheerful surprisingly, despite the grim situation we're heading into. That worried me for a little while. In the end though I've decided to just accept it and try to make it last. She hasn't mentioned our conversation immediately after the escape from Trost yet. We'll probably have to get back to it at some point, but for now I think we can let it lie.

It's only just recently that I've noticed something strange though. Ymir seems to stick with Historia like a kind of bodyguard. I'd always assumed during training that they were just friends and Historia gave me that impression too. But these past few days I've started to wonder about that. She barely talks to Historia and is always shadowing her. Even now she's riding just behind her, and I wonder if she's listening in on our conversation. It's almost as if, I don't know, she was her older sister or something. In appearance of course that idea seems foolish. The two of them couldn't look more different. Historia is short and fair with blue eyes while Ymir is tall and dark. She also has a far more, anti-social bearing towards most people. And she tends to be very pessimistic.

Historia's explanation of her childhood might have something to do with it however. Ymir could be some kind of appointed bodyguard I suppose. It's possible that someone in Historia's family doesn't want her to get killed, but it's also possible that she's here just to keep an eye on her and make sure she doesn't give away who she is. Either way, Ymir makes me very uneasy. I don't want to worry about her right now though.

"An old man told me an interesting story about that once. It was about a lesser god who lost his family so ran away from all his responsibilities in the heavens to travel through time. He went to all sorts of places and did all sorts of incredible things, but in the end he realised that he could never escape the memories of the family he had lost. So in the end he went home only to find it had been destroyed by one of the enemies he had made on his travels. In the end his own refusal to cope with his loss led to a loss for many others. He became the lonely god who had nowhere to go home, and now they say he wanders through all of time trying to find some way to get home."

"That's not a very happy story you know."

"Sorry, it is a bit gloomy. The old man said there was more to it, but he left the next day and I never got to ask about it. I suppose it's just something I'll never know."

"You could always make the end up yourself. Have you ever tried making up stories?"

"Well I've never really-

"All right people stow the chatter!" comes the voice of our leader from up ahead. "We're here! The Scout Regiment's HQ!"

We come out from the shade of the trees into a wide open space. Standing in the centre of the clear space is a massive house, though to be honest I would have been far more inclined to call it a castle. With numerous tiers capped by battlements and tower like structures at the corners it could certainly pass for one.

"It's a castle," Sasha breathes from my left.

"No, it's still actually a house," I say. "This building clearly wasn't built to defend anything. The nobles just used to build their houses to look like castles because it gave them an appearance of strength."

"What do mean used to?"

"Back in the days before the Titans this how they would do it." 'Wait, how do I know that?'

"I thought I told you all to be quiet back there!" booms the Corporal.

"Sorry sir!" I call back.

We ride off to the right rather than straight up to castle, to where a large complex sprawls with numerous buildings, in particular the stables. We all dismount and stable our horses in empty stalls. As I give my horse Edward and friendly rub on the nose, I laugh at the idea that I used to be afraid of horses. I've been riding Edward for the past year now. He's rather friendly towards people he knows but tends to take a shy approach to people he doesn't. His coat is a deep black with a white mark down his forehead and two white socks on his hind legs. I'm not sure why I named him Edward; it just seemed to come to me. He seemed to like the name so I stuck with it.

I look up at the sheer gray stone surface of the 'castle' walls. Strangely, part of the stone seems to have been scrapped clean of moss and weeds, but part way along that stops. Almost as if someone hadn't finished the job yet. 'But who on earth would both with something like that?'

"All right rookies!" calls out a newcomer with short dark hair. "Welcome to the Scouts! This is the building we're currently using as our HQ, since not only is it closer to Karanese District but it also provides a more secure environment for our special guest. I'm pretty sure you all know who I'm talking about so I won't bother talking about it any further.

"Your sleeping quarters are going to be in the outside buildings. Only so many people can fit inside the actual building itself you see. Now, we're going to give half an hour to find your quarters and get settled. Then we expect you back here for your assignments. The Regiment's still settling in here so we'll be making use of you all around the place for the next few days. Dismissed."

I notice as the group disperses that most of them don't look particularly cheerful. Jean in particular looks grim. I suppose I can understand why. I mean, we did just join the Regiment with the lowest possible life expectancy. Despite everything however, this is a new phase of my life and I always feel good entering one of those. I won't deny that a sense of lingering fear still hides at the back of my mind, but right now I'm going to ignore it. I turn and start making my way in the direction indicated to find my quarters.

Twenty minutes later and I consider myself thoroughly settled. The cadets make up about a quarter of those sleeping outside in a complex of buildings directly behind the HQ. The rest all seem to be inexperienced compared to those inside. I guess that's how they decided who got to sleep in the comfort of a proper building. Still, it isn't so bad. The rooms are actually larger than the ones we had to share during training, though we still have four people to a room. I'm sharing with Armin, Jean and Connie, while Reiner and Bertolt are set up in the second room of our particular building. Connie keeps grumbling about Reiner and Bertolt having a room all to themselves.

The men and women are situated in separate halves of the sleeping quarters as per the usual regulations. Armin and I meet Mikasa on the way out and we all go back to the stables together. We figure that since there's not much else to do around here except stand around and talk we might as well do it where we're going to have to end up in ten minutes time. I can tell from the way that Mikasa keeps checking the face of every person we pass by that she's hoping spot Eren.

Her hopes are rewarded a few minutes later when Eren finds us. "Hey guys!" he calls out coming from behind us.

Before either me or Armin can say anything Mikasa dashes forwards and seizes Eren by the shoulders. "Eren! Are you okay? Have they done anything to you, like submitting you to any cruel experiments?"

"What? No!"

"I don't trust these people, especially that stupid pipsqueak. I'm going to make him pay for what he did to you one day!"

"Wait, Captain Levi? Mikasa are you all right?"

"Yes. What do you mean by that?"

"Right about now, I'm not entirely sure." Extricating himself from her grasp he turns to me and Armin. "So, how are you guys?"

"We're as fine as one can expect given the circumstances," says Armin.

"Yeah, I feel excited but so terrified at the same time I wonder if I'm going to throw up," I say.

"Ugh, please don't," sighs Eren. "I'd have to clean it up."

We all laugh. "Did anyone else join the Scouts?" asks Eren.

"Yes actually!" comes the voice of Reiner from behind me. The others have been gathering around the area as well, and it looks like everyone's here except for Jean.

"Wait, you guys are all here? That's great! So, did Jean, Annie and Marco join the Military Police then?"

"Marco is dead." Eren spins in shock to face Jean who was standing off to the side looking gloomy.

"What? M-Marco's not dead," stutters Eren. "You're just playing some kind of joke right?"

"I wish I could say he went out in a blaze of glory," continues Jean as if hasn't heard Eren, "but the truth is I don't know how he went out. He died alone."

Eren stares at the ground in shock. But before he can say anything Jean goes on. "Eren, I want to know. What's this I hear about you trying to kill Mikasa during the recovery operation?"

Eren cringes at that. "That's not true," interjects Mikasa. "He thought he was swatting a fly nothing more."

"No offence, but I didn't ask you."

"Apparently yes it's true," admits Eren.

"Apparently, as in you don't remember? Great, so basically you can turn into a fifteen metre tall uncontrollable monster at will. You hear that everybody? Humanity's greatest hope right here."

"Jean," I hiss in exasperation. "What the hell are you trying to do?"

Jean sighs. "Look, I just want Eren to give me, no, give us something to go on here. Not all of us are willing to just die for him without any good reason unlike you three. We need something to put our faith in. Some reason to trust Eren with our lives. If he can give us one then we won't hesitate should the time come. Do you think you can do that Eren? Can you give us a reason to die for you? If the answer is yes, then we're with you all the way."

Eren doesn't answer. "I, I'm not sure," he says eventually. "But I'll try."

"I guess that'll have to do for now huh?" Jean grunts and turns away.

"What is his problem?" I ask no one in particular.

"He isn't friends with Eren," answers Armin. "And he isn't willing to throw his life away. I can understand his position, even though I'm not sure I agree with it."

"Well, I agree with his point. I just don't agree with his delivery."

"So," says Eren suddenly, "Marco's dead then. I wonder how many more of us are going to die before all this is over."

I shiver. To hear Eren talking like this is frightening. Eren has always been the fiery one who never gives much of a dam about the lesser consequences of his actions. The only thing that mattered to him was the main cause, the main goal. I guess things change. Mikasa puts a hand on Eren's shoulder to comfort him, but he shrugs it off. "I'm fine," he says stubbornly. That's more like the old Eren I remember. Not that refusal to be comforted by the one who cares for him the most is really a particularly alluring quality.

"Hey rookies!" calls one of the Scouts. "Your new uniforms are here."

All of us are each handed a green field cloak, on the back of which is emblazoned the Wings of Freedom. We're expected to send in our jackets tomorrow so that their badges can be changed around for those of the Scouts. I throw the cloak around my shoulders, letting the folds of fabric envelop me. Tying it at the next I move my arms around a bit. It feels a little encumbering, but I'm sure I'll get used to it.

As the wind sends a gust of cold air down into the stables, it catches my cloak and sends it streaming out behind me. I shut my eyes allowing the air to wash over me. As I shut my eyes I hear a voice. It's very faint, as if from far away. _"I only have to be here for one month. After that it will all be over."_


	16. The 57th Recon Mission Part 1

Chapter 15: The 57th Recon Mission Part 1: Titan Country

The next month was a mixture of enjoyment, anticipation and frustration. Mostly I'd have to call it anticipation. The knowledge that in less than a month's time I'd be riding out beyond the Walls to face the Titans on their own turf gnawed at me relentlessly. This in turn led to bouts of intense frustration at the delay. All I wanted was to get it over with on some days, while on others I found myself hoping the day would never come. Well, whether I like it or not that day is here now. "Scouts move out!" echoes the order of Commander Erwin back down the line, and the entire Regiment begins to move. 294 riders thunder through the gate of Karanese District, the entire regiment save a handful of rearguards in the buildings just outside the gate.

The Regiment moves like a green cloaked tide, swiftly passing through the streets and out into the flats. I hear a crash behind me as I leave the cover of the buildings and turn to look back. A titan that wasn't lured away by the Garrison troops earlier has just emerged from the streets. The rearguards have engaged it but don't seem to have taken it down. 'Just keep moving,' I tell myself. 'Those are the orders you were given. All you have to do is keep moving forwards and worry about your place in the formation. The rest is not your responsibility.'

As the Corps comes out onto the plains the densely packed ranks begin to break up into a wide dispersion. I move towards the right of the formation, keeping Armin behind me and the front of the rank ahead of me. I'm leading a second horse alongside me, since as the new recruits we've been deliberately assigned a more secure position and task. Our main job is to help pass along the signals and to ferry fresh horses to those who need them. We're not expected to engage in much combat during this mission. I won't deny that came as a bit of a relief. I'm not keen on being thrust straight into a battle situation under these conditions. Still, the Commander estimated that a third of the new soldiers would die during this mission, so I'm not about to let my guard down either.

As the formation spreads out into its normal positions, the gaps between me and the others widen considerably, until all I can see of any of them is a dark mark off in the distance. We hold at that distance between us. The Long Range Scouting Formation is designed to have a wide line of spotters along the front to warn the rest of the Regiment of any approaching titans. Through a series of smoke signals the entire formation is then warned of the titan's position and the Commander then has the Regiment alter course.

So far at least everything seems quiet. I can hear birds chirping in nearby trees and the occasional rustle of a small animal. The ground here is mostly flat fields with the occasional hedge and copse of trees. I should be able to see a titan coming long before it reaches me. I take deep breaths to calm my steady build up of nerves and try to focus on the horizon. The only thing I'm going to have to worry about this deep in is relaying signals.

For the first two minutes of riding there's nothing, then a distant wisp of red rises up into the sky. 'It's out with the right wing spotters. I'd better fire mine off as well.' I pull my flare pistol out from its holster at my belt and pull a red signal out of a side bag. Since I need to avoid creating confusion as to the titan's whereabouts, I need to wait for the person next closest to the signal point to send up their flare. It only takes about ten seconds for a second red smoke trail to rise into the sky, pointing towards the titan's original position. I quickly follow suit; clamping one hand over my left ear and firing the flare into the air. 'Dam that thing is loud!'

Knowing how loud a normal signal round is, I'd hate to be in close proximity to an acoustic round. The idea of something at least twice as loud as the shot I just fired makes my ears tingle. Over the course of the next minute a series of red smoke trails arch up into the sky, all pointing towards the titan's position. Then a green signal rockets up towards the clouds off to my left, pointing for the formation to switch its position. I acknowledge by firing off a green signal of my own in that direction. 'After an hour of this I think I'll be happy to get home. And we're going to be out here for a lot longer in all probability.'

Even as the thoughts pass through my head I see a new red signal rising from off to the left. With a sigh I lock a red signal round into place and wait my turn.

About ten minutes later, the routine of red and green signals is broken by a signal I was hoping not to see at all. A black streak of smoke tears up through the sky far off to my right and behind. A titan has chosen to ignore the spotters and is instead choosing to run right into the formation. That means an abnormal. I can't see it yet, but fit a black canister onto the end of my pistol. Then I see it emerge from a small clump of trees.

The creature makes even normal titans look strange by comparison. It runs with its arms pressed close to its sides down to the elbow, at which point it splays its limbs outwards. Mouth permanently hanging open and head tilted on an uncomfortable angle, the titan would probably look comical if it wasn't for the immense danger it poses. I flash back to Thomas's death with a shiver.

I look back over my shoulder to where I can see Armin as a faint outline capped in green. The abnormal is heading right his way. If the rank over doesn't take it out I'll fall to try and help him. Seeing the titan draw closer I fire off my signal; straight up. I keep watching the titan out of the corner of my eye, but I can't afford to let it occupy my full attention. A red flare rises from up towards the front, and I lock in a red signal of my own. I fire it a little earlier than is probably necessary.

Looking back over my shoulder again I can see two riders galloping on either side of the demented titan. As I watch, one of them flies off his horse towards the abnormal having fired his 3D Gear. He streaks across behind the titan and cuts out its Achilles tendon on the left leg. Crippled the titan pitches forwards onto its face with a crash.

The second rider leaps from his own saddle in good form, and performs a clean horizontal strike. He cuts out the entire nap, leaving the titan lying dead in the grass. Steam slowly begins to rise from the dead body. I smile in relief and turn back to look straight ahead.

 _"Not in the right wing."_

"Wait, what?" I ask out loud. I look around me but there's no one who could have said anything.

 _"The front line should only last a few minutes once the rest get here."_

"Who is that? Where are you?" The voice sounds like the person is right next to me, but the closest people I can make out are Armin and the two Scouts how took down the abnormal. The voice sounds like a woman with a strange kind of husk to her words. She also sounds slightly muffled as if speaking with her head in a pillow.

 _"Where is the Coordinate?"_

Then it hits me suddenly; the voice is in my head! 'Am I going insane? I mean, I suppose that's possible after everything.' I try to think clearly, blocking out thoughts of panic that begin to flood into my mind. 'It's just the pressure of the moment. I can't be going insane; I feel perfectly normal.'

I wait for a few minutes to see if the voice comes again. Nothing. I let out a sigh of relief and shake myself. 'See, just your imagination.'

 _"Two up ahead. Should be easy."_

'Dam it! Shut up!'

Suddenly there's a crack from behind me. I look back to see a black smoke trail rising from behind me. In the far distance I can see the shape of a second abnormal moving forwards. It's moving fast. Incredibly fast. The shape grows in size rapidly until I can distinguish the head, arms and legs all clearly. It's a very unusual looking titan indeed.

Most of its skin seems to be a pale pink, but parts of it-including the arms-are a dark red. Almost as if it doesn't have any skin in those areas. The weirdest thing about it though, is that it seems to be, well, female. Titans resemble males without any exception on record, but this one has the curved figure of a female. Blonde hair hangs down to just above shoulder level, with a significant fringe covering the titan's face.

I'm so surprised I don't bother to fit a black flare to my pistol. The titan is still moving up at an alarming rate. In about a minute it'll be on top of Armin. In five minutes it'll have reached me. 'What is that thing though? She can't be any normal kind of titan because well, she's a she! Also her general appearance is so strange. It kind of reminds of...No, it couldn't be could it?'

The two Scouts who brought down the first abnormal are moving into position to intercept the oncoming enemy. 'I guess we'll see then. I wish I could call out and warn them that this one isn't likely to be all she seems. Though, they're experienced soldiers right? They've got this.'

The Female Titan dashes past the two men, then stops suddenly and spins her right leg out to the side in a swift kick. The Scout on her right is crushed underneath her heel. The second man is already in the air with both cables stuck into her left shoulder. Before he can react to his comrade's demise the Female Titan seizes his wire and rips him out of the air. The man flails for a few moments before being flung brutally into the ground. The force is so great it kills him instantly. Then, as if nothing had happened the titan resumes her course.

I stare in horror at the scene. 'She just, took them out in less than ten seconds. She knew they were about to try and cut her down so she reacted before they could attack! That shouldn't be possible!' The Female Titan continues to hurtle forwards towards Armin, who is by now riding as fast and hard as he can in an effort to get away from his pursuer. He'll never manage it though; she's just too fast.

Gritting my teeth I let my extra horse loose and turn my mount around. 'We can't out run her. There's no choice but to fight her!' I gallop back towards Armin drawing both blades as I hunch down in the saddle. Part of me has already decided that it isn't going to survive this, and the rest of me is still clinging to what it knows is a vain hope. This titan just exhibited intelligence; two rookies don't stand a chance.

The titan reaches Armin first however, crushing his spare horse and knocking Armin out of the saddle. He lands in the grass his hood draped over his body. I draw to a stop. 'No, no Armin please don't be dead.' The Female Titan stops and bends over the crumpled form. Much to my relief the form moves slightly as the titan's shadow falls over it. I spur my horse on again as the titan lifts up Armin's hood and, looks at his face?

 _"Armin,"_ hisses the voice in my head.

'That voice, it's her! I can hear her inside my head!'

The Female Titan rises back to her feet and continues in her forward pace. 'She, she knowingly chose not to kill him? I guess that settles it then she's defiantly intelligent.' As the titan bears down on me I swerve off to the left but she lashes out at me with her right leg. I'm just out of her reach however. I turn around to face her, swords drawn. 'I'm about to die.' But to my surprise she isn't facing me. After taking her swipe at me she continued on her course without even a backwards glance.

Deciding to take care of the here and now first I turn towards Armin. "Armin! Are you all right?"

"Y, Yes," he stutters as I offer him a hand to help up onto my horse. He scrambles up behind me and I can feel him still shaking with fear. It's handy neither of us is known for our weight; Edward manages us both just fine. "Did, did you see it?" he asks in a hoarse whisper.

"Yeah, I saw it. She's intelligent."

Armin nods, "for some reason she needed to check my face. She must be looking for someone in particular."

"She even knew your name."

"What?" Armin asks in total confusion.

"Didn't you hear her? She said your name."

"She didn't say anything that I heard. She never even opened her mouth."

"But, but I heard her! I'm telling you I heard her in my head!"

"In your head? How is that even possible?"

Before I can say anything I realise something. "I forgot to send up a flare!" Fumbling with my pistol I send up a black signal. "I wish we had another kind of flare to say intelligent type," I mutter. "Anyone who runs into her without knowing what to expect will be cut down."

"Hey!" shouts someone from behind. I look back to see Reiner riding hard and coming up from behind. "Guys, what the hell's going on? Armin, what happened to your horse?"

"She did," says Armin pointing forwards.

"She?" asks Reiner.

"That titan up there appears to be female."

"Heh, I thought that was a pretty good ass for an abnormal."

"It's not an abnormal," explains Armin as I put a hand to my head in exasperation. "She's a human being wearing a titan body."

"What? What makes you say that?"

"Her appearance is one factor. The main reason though is that the goal for most titans is to consume us right? They don't consume humans to kill us; they consume us out of a primal desire to feed. Sometimes they kill us whilst trying to get hold of us, but it's always clear that that's by accident. Those two back there, when they went for her nape she didn't try to grab them to eat them, she tore them right out of the air and crushed them! She wasn't trying to feed, she was trying to kill.

"No titan, not even an abnormal passes up on a potential meal. The only other time at titan has ever chosen not to eat a person is when Eren's Berserker Titan appeared. So I can only assume this is a similar incident. You remember the theories about the Armoured and Colossal Titans being the same way? I think she might be their comrade or something."

Reiner grits his teeth. "Dam. I don't like the idea all that much, but it makes sense."

"The idea that anyone would willingly do something like break through Wall Maria," I say, my voice heavy. "It's just unthinkable that any human being could justify that." No one says anything.

Then I hear the sound of another set of approaching hooves and look back to see Jean coming up from behind as well. Armin hurriedly fills him in as we ride on. "Hmm," ponders Jean. "If we let her keep going like this she'll cut down the command squad. If that happens the formation goes to hell and we all die. We need to slow her down and give the next few ranks a chance to prepare."

"I don't like where this is going," I say.

"We don't have much of a choice," says Armin. "But make no mistake, to her we're not what you'd call obstacles. I'd say that we're nothing more than flies; one swipe that arm and we're all dead!"

"Is that a fact?" asks Jean with a frightening laugh. "What a terrifying thought!" He swallows and looks determined enough though.

"Who are you and what have you done with the real Jean?" asks Reiner. "No offence man, but the guy I knew was only interested in looking after himself."

"Well, some things change I guess. Don't get me wrong guys; I'm still all about number one. I just don't want to end up a pile of old bones no one knows the name of. I can see now that hiding's no good. The only real option is to fight!"


	17. The 57th Recon Mission Part 2

Chapter 16: 57th Recon Mission Part 2: The Female Titan

"She's slowed her pace a bit," points out Armin. "It's possible running flat out has taken its toll on her."

"Armin, you said earlier that you thought she was looking for someone?" I ask.

"Yes, I believe so. She deliberately bent over to check my face, and when she saw who I was she moved on. That strongly implies she's after someone in particular."

"Who?" asks Reiner.

"Who else. She's here for Eren, I'm certain of it."

"Well, she's in the wrong place if she's after the Levi Squad," I say. "They're supposed to be on the left wing."

"Wait what? My copy of the plan put them in the right," says Reiner.

"You must have gotten mixed up there Reiner," says Jean. "My copy said left as well."

"No," says Armin, "my copy of the plan put Eren in the right flank as well. Now that I think about it that doesn't really make any sense."

"Then, where might Eren really be?" asks Reiner.

"The safest place in the formation; rear of the centre rank!"

"Are you sure?" I ask.

"It's the only spot that makes any sense. An asset that valuable isn't going to be posted in a dangerous locality. Even if Eren's not in the rear, I'm certain he's in the centre rank."

"It doesn't matter where Eren is," interrupts Jean. "What matters is that we buy some time for the right wing to regroup and stop her advance. We just need to keep her one place for a little while. If we cut out her legs that should keep her down for at least a minute. Since Matthias and I are the fastest we'll go for that, while you two distract her!"

"Got it," nods Reiner.

We ride forwards rapidly, all blades drawn now. "Come back for me when we're done here all right boy?" I whisper in Edward's ear. "I'd hate to have to walk." The Female Titan has defiantly slowed down now; we're gaining on her quickly now. Only a few more metres until we're in ODM range. I tense up a little. 'Just relax. You have to stay limber. You're the fastest in the 104th, that's got to count for something right?'

I unhook my feet from my stirrups in preparation for the attack. I can feel Armin bracing himself to jump off behind me. Only a few more metres until we're in range. Three metres, two metres. Suddenly without any warning the Female Titan spins and launches a kick towards Armin and me. I pull up sharp but not quickly enough. Edward slips beneath me then falls. I manage to slip out of the saddle just in time to avoid having my legs crushed. It doesn't stop the impact from jarring my whole body though. Armin flies off completely not even having the limited security of the saddle.

Out of the corner of my eye I can see Jean leaping out of the saddle and firing both grapples into her left shoulder. I can't see Reiner. There's no time to worry about Armin right now; I have to move before she crushes me. I fire my hooks and pull myself hastily into the air. It's not a good hook so I let go in mid air, turning to fire again.

The Female Titan has come to a complete stop, and to my amazement has placed her left hand over the back of her neck. 'She's protecting her weak spot!' I feel a shiver run down my spine as she looks straight at me. Her eyes are under-shadowed by an exposed area of bare muscles, making their dull grey blue stand out all the more.

 _"Sacrifice!"_ I hear her hiss in my head. That word, it seems all too familiar for some reason, but I can't remember why.

Terrified I let myself drop under her gaze before firing into her right arm. I only stay attached for a second, enough time to get the direction and rely on my gas to give me momentum. I can't afford to stay hooked on her for long. Firing again at her left knee I pull myself lower, and spin around behind her. One more hook into her right leg and I can make the cut.

But somehow-even though the whole move has taken me less than two seconds to perform-she already knows to react. Leaping into the air, she pulls me up with her forcing me to let go of my hook. As I continue to move up she lashes out with her left hand and grabs at me. I manage to slash the tips of her fingers off, allowing me to slip through her grasp. As she lands again I fire into her now exposed back and hurl myself forwards, hoping to cut the spinal cord.

Yet again she anticipates my move and turns on the spot, sending me flying around her shoulders in an out of control spin. I desperately try to hit another shot, but I only manage to fire my right grapple which goes wide of the target. I hit the ground with a hard thud, bouncing and rolling several metres which causes my gear to disconnect.

I look up to see her towering over me. My gear is gone; I'm a sitting duck.

"You stupid bitch!" screams someone. I look over to realise it's Armin. "You killed him!" At these last words the Female Titan seems to freeze. "You killed my best friend you filthy slut!" Armin howls.

'What the hell are you doing Armin? Wait a moment, I get it now.'

"I know I told him the right wing was suicide but that didn't stop him from going along anyway. And you've killed him! Crushed him under your foot! I hope someone cuts out your heart!"

Out of the corner of my eye I can see Reiner flying through the air. 'He's aiming for the nape!'

 _"Nice try Armin."_

"Reiner wait; she knows!" I call out trying to warn him. It's already too late though. The Female Titan snatches Reiner clean out of the air, grasping him in her right hand. All I can do is stare in horror as she almost idly places her thumb over Reiner's head, and presses down.

Blood sprays into the air and I feel like screaming. Nothing comes though, just shock. 'Reiner is, dead?' Suddenly there's an explosion of blood and flesh out of the Female Titan's hand as Reiner emerges, both blades and much of his clothes covered in titan blood. He fires into The Female Titan's shoulder and spins around her. He grabs Armin as he lands and runs for it.

As if brought back to life I desperately make a break for my gear, snatching it up from its fallen position on the ground. I sprint desperately away, expecting every moment to be smashed into a bloody pulp. Nothing happens though, and I put some distance between myself and her before I look back. She's just sitting there, staring at her smoking hand as if in shock. Her left hand is back covering her nape, so there go any ideas of taking advantage of her stupor. At this point though I really don't care; I just want to get as far away from her as possible. Even though it didn't go to plan, that fight bought at least five minutes, probably more since she'll have to run slow for a while after this.

 _"Rear of the centre rank."_ The Female Titan rises to her feet and turns to face that very same direction. She starts off at a slow pace, building up into a steady run. She's defiantly slower now though.

'Wait a moment, how does she know she needs to head for the rear of the centre rank? She was heading for the front of it when we attacked her.' The thought crosses my mind that perhaps, if I can hear her thoughts she can hear mine. I gave away what Armin was trying to do, and I know I had to have had the knowledge of Eren's location in my mind as well. A titan that can read minds is not a very pleasant idea.

I stagger back to the others as the thumping steps of our fourteen metre tall enemy begin to fade away into the distance. "Well, that should have bought the Company time enough to prepare," says Reiner.

"Doesn't matter," I say. "She's not going that way anymore. She's heading for the rear of the centre rank. Somehow she just realised her mistake."

"What?" asks Jean. "Unless you're suggesting one of us told her, I don't see how she could know!"

"I'm not sure that was needed. Ever since she first appeared I've been hearing a voice in my head that matches up perfectly with her actions. I think she may have been able to read my thoughts."

"That makes even less sense than one of us telling her," argues Reiner. "How exactly would she be able to do that? You're just stressed out Matthias."

"It is possible that your knowledge of her intelligence has prompted you to imagine a voice to go along with her actions," says Armin. "But," he continues before I can protest, "We need to worry about getting out of here for now. Jean's horse was crushed during the fight." I looked over to see the bloodied and broken body of Jean's light brown steed lying the grass.

"What about your horse Matthias?" asks Reiner. "Do you think he can manage?"

I walk over to where Edward has managed to climb back to his feet and is blowing hard. "I think he'll be okay," I say, stroking his nose gently.

"That's two horses between four people," states Jean, a little unnecessarily.

"Armin and I are both light enough to ride with," I point out.

"Yeah, but Reiner isn't. That means one of us will have to stay behind."

"Hey, don't go giving up just yet," says Reiner. "Matthias, see if you can patch up Armin. I'm going to go try and call my spare horse."

I nod and turn to Armin. He has blood leaking down over his eyes from a wound in his forehead. I brush back his hair to see a shallow gash running all the way along his head. It's been partly covered in dirt from the landing. "How bad is it?" asks Armin, wincing slightly.

"The cut itself isn't really much to worry about," I reply. "But it's got so much dirt in it that if we don't clean it you'll probably have an infection before the end of the day." I rummage around in the small medical pouch that all soldiers are issued with and pull out a bandage and a small cloth. "This might sting," I warn. Armin shrugs and grits his teeth. Deliberately applying a large amount of pressure I draw the cloth over the wound. Armin looks just about ready to scream as I'm doing it. When I take the cloth away it's covered in a disgusting mix of blood and grime.

"That it?" asks Armin, slightly out of breath.

"Yeah, that should be all we need to do for now. I'll bandage it up and then you'll be ready to go."

"We'll still have to get it looked at when we get back though."

"Right. Can you hold your fringe up for a second?" Armin does so and I wrap the bandage several times around his head, making sure to cover the wound completely. I then use one of my blades to cut the bandage and tie it off. "How's the pressure feel?"

"A little bit tight, but it's fine. Thanks."

"Don't worry about it. At least you didn't land on anything. The last thing we need right now is you getting impaled." Armin nods grimly at that. "By the way, why'd you shut me up back there?"

"I can't explain now. Wait until later. But, just to be sure, can you hear anything now?"

I take a long slow breath and clear my mind as much as I can. I can hear what seems to be a faint whisper from far away. I can't make out any words though. "There's a very slight noise, but I could be imagining that easily enough." Armin nods, looking thoughtfully down at the ground.

For the next two minutes we all stand in silence apart from Reiner's whistling. Eventually the blonde haired giant looks back at us dismally. "Nothing. He must have bolted miles away by now."

"So then, one of us is going to have stay put here," says Jean. "Any volunteers?"

"Wait a moment," says Armin. "Shouldn't we at least fire off a smoke signal first? If everyone kept going straight there should be people from row four within close proximity to us right now."

"Worth a shot I guess," I say. Jean shrugs and fits a smoke round onto the end of his pistol. Everyone covers their ears as he fires the round straight into the air. A trail of purple smoke rises into the blue sky.

"It is the emergency signal," says Jean, "but I doubt someone's going to see it and think: "hey, somebody must need an extra horse.""

I sigh. 'This is bad. If it comes to it whoever stays behind will likely die. I mean, it's not impossible to make it back to the Wall from this far out. I've heard stories of Scouts pulling it off in the past. The odds are very heavily in favour against that though.'

"We can only afford to wait a few minutes," says Reiner. "So we'd better decide who's going to stay behind now."

We all look at each other uncomfortably. I get the feeling that if it comes to it, none of us would say no. None of us wants to say yes though. 'Any of us dropping out would do the trick I'd say. Reiner needs a horse to himself because of his size, but either Armin or I can share with anyone else here. Armin can't be left behind; losing his brain would be a real blow, even if he doesn't think so. Reiner the number two out of the entire 104th, so dropping him would be a waste. It's either me or Jean, and since Jean scored higher than I did, I suppose that means it's going to be me.' Hands shaking I open my mouth to speak.

Armin beats me too it though, "it should be me who stays," he says. "But I'm going to need one of you to take a message to Commander Erwin."

"Armin wait a moment," I interrupt. "You're not thinking this out clearly. You're one of the best tacticians in the entire military; we can't afford to just leave you out here."

"I'd say you're overestimating me by a pretty large margin there Matthias."

"And I'd say I'm not. Reiner staying would be a bad idea as well, since he's one of the best titan killers from the 104th. I'd say it should be me who stays. I have the lowest score out of me and Jean. Besides, you're wounded already. Whoever stays might as well be in with a chance."

"Now hang on a minute," says Reiner. "I'm not so sure that's a fair call Matthias. You-

"Hey guys, shut up and look over there!" exclaims Jean excitedly. We all turn to look at Jean in surprise. "Someone must have been close by when we sent up the flare. There's a rider coming our way, with two spare horses!"

We all strain to make out the figure clearly in the distance. I can see the two horses on either side, but I can't make out anything clearly besides the rider's small stature. Then, I see a flash of blonde hair and as the rider draws closer I can begin to make out the shape of their face. "It's Krista!" cries Jean with delight. It is indeed Historia.

As she gets closer she puts a hand to her mouth and calls out. "Hey guys! Are you all right?!"

"Yeah," replies Reiner as Historia draws up to a stop. "Armin's a little banged up but more or less everything's fine."

"So, did you guys fight a titan?"

"Sort of."

"Personally I wouldn't have called that a fight," I say. "More like flailing wildly and somehow managing not to die."

"Speak for yourself," huffs Jean.

"Well, so long as you're all okay," says Historia with her usual Krista smile. I've found it rather strange how she behaves in two different ways when I'm talking to her. In public she acts like the Krista Lenz persona she still keeps up. In private she's very different. I still can't quite place her personality. She seems to be unsure of herself then, like she can't make up her mind over how she should act. Sometimes she just defaults back to Krista because it's easier and other times she's the hollow version of herself. I'm doing my best but I won't deny it does get a little wearing at times. It hasn't changed the way I think of her though.

Suddenly, I notice that Armin is staring. I kick him in the shin. "Hey, keep your eyes to yourself," I hiss.

"Sorry," mutters Armin, "Couldn't help it."

I stride over to Edward and mount up. "We'd better get moving as quickly as we can guys; the formation's still moving and we're out of place." Jean takes one of the horses from Krista which turns out to be Reiner's spare and climbs on. Reiner mounts his own horse and Armin scrambles on to Historia's spare horse.

"We need to get word to the Commander," says Armin. "Word needs to get out how dangerous she is."

"She?" asks Historia in confusion.

"It's a long story," I say. "I'll tell you later okay?" Historia nods a little uncertainly.


	18. The 57th Recon Mission Part 3

Chapter 17: The 57th Recon Mission Part 3: The Forest of Giant Trees

The expedition's been gone from the Walls only a half hour and it already feels like it's about to break. Apparently it should take around four hours to ride between Karanese and Shiganshina. Making a full four hour trip with conditions like this seems laughable. Thought I suppose no one was expecting the Female Titan to show up. I've no idea what exactly is going on in the rest of the formation. There have been numerous red flares towards the front of the right, along with black flares following a line steadily closer and closer to the centre rank. The Female Titan seems to be getting awfully close to her target now.

To make matters worse, we show no sign of stopping or even changing course to break away. The Regiment is holding a steady pace and heading directly south. From what I can tell the right wing spotters have taken a massive hit, almost all of them were wiped out by a huge titan attack that came out of nowhere. The thing is, that's exactly what the Female Titan said would happen. That implies she planned this whole thing very neatly. Word must have gotten back to the Commander by now and he's chosen to do nothing about it. I can only assume that means he knows what he's doing.

On the horizon I can see a great dark smudge of green. It looks like a forest, except the trees must be at least twice the normal size. 'It must be one of those forests of giant trees that they used to use as tourist attractions before the fall of Wall Maria. We'll adjust course to steer around it before long.' I prove to be mistaken, as we maintain our current heading. At this rate we'll run right into the forest.

This turns out to be a very accurate assessment as I find myself drawing up alongside many of the right flank at the forest's edge. "What now?" I hear someone ask.

"The wagons and support squads have already gone in," says our Captain. "We've been given orders to secure the perimeter. Not one titan gets into the forest, understood?"

"Yes sir!" comes the universal reply. Despite this I detect a distinct level of reluctance among the less experienced soldiers. Our horses are tethered up in a stable that must have been used by travellers five years ago. The entire right flank then takes to the trees, alighting on the branches with their backs to the inside of the forest.

I'm perched on a massive branch slightly above Armin and to his left. Jean is crouching in the tree opposite us. "What the hell is the Commander thinking?" grumbles Jean. "Not that it matters all that much to us; all we have to do is make sure no titans get in to disturb his private retreat."

I shake my head. "You've got one thing right there Jean," I say. "It doesn't matter to us what the Commanders thinking. We're soldiers; we need to be prepared to follow orders."

"Yeah well, I'd like to at least have some idea as to why I'm being given said orders."

"So would I," I admit. I give Armin a cursory glance. "What do you think Armin? Why are we here?"

"I'm not really sure," responds Armin a little evasively. "I suppose it's possible that it was an accident and the Commander needs some time to regroup."

"Heh, maybe he's planning to throw all the rookies a big surprise party," says Jean, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"I rather doubt that," replies Armin. He pauses, looking down at the ground far below us. "There's only one thing that could have caused this decision that I can see. We're here because of the Female Titan. I think we may be luring her into a trap."

Jean and I are both silent at this. 'I guess that makes sense. It would also explain why we never changed course at any point between now and her appearance. But still, why not just go home when she first arrived?'

 _"Not far now. He should be just up ahead."_

I freeze. "Armin," I say quietly. "I can hear here again. She seems to think she's almost got him." Armin's eyes widen and he looks at me worriedly. "Tell me, what is it you're worried about?"

"Why I cut you off before? Because I don't know who we can trust."

"Hey," butts in Jean. "What are you two conspirators whispering about over there?"

I give Armin a questioning look. He shrugs. "You're the one who hears her, your call."

"Thaaanks," I look up at Jean. Would he be trust worthy? I can't see why not really. He's risked his life multiple times to fight the titans and I'd say I know him fairly well by this point. 'But then, why did Armin cut me off when the only ones who could have overheard were Jean and Reiner?' "Well, you see," I begin still trying to make up my mind as I talk. "Armin thinks that someone might be a traitor."

Armin raises his eyebrows at that. "Well, it makes sense to me. During the battle of Trost the Titans had the approach to the gate wide open after the soldiers retreated. They could have struck then and there and ended it all, but they didn't. Something made them revaluate their plan and the only thing I can think that could be is Eren.

"One of them must have seen Eren transform. That means that not only is there at least one traitor within our ranks, but it means that they must be one of the cadets. Also, the implication is that whoever killed the two titan test subjects wasn't working alone. They had have had a look out to warn them about the guards as well. That implies more than one traitor. Also, the Female Titan attack from the right wing, which is where numerous copies of the plan said Eren would be. The odds are in favour of there being more traitors amongst the rookies."

"And you think I might be one," finishes Jean.

"We don't know what to think."

"Well in case you forgot, my copy of the plan put Eren on the left."

"That's true," admits Armin. He looks at me. "You want to tell him?"

"Sure," I say. "You see Jean, I've been hearing voices in my head for a while now and I'm pretty sure it's the Female Titan."

"Oh yeah, you said something about that earlier. I thought you were losing it."

"So did I at first. In the beginning I couldn't understand where it could be coming from. When she looked under Armin's hood though, I heard her say his name. On top of that she said something implied she knew about Armin's attempt to trick her into thinking she'd accidently killed Eren. That's why I called out to try and warn Reiner. And just now I heard her say that-

 _"There! There you are Yeager!"_

"She's found him!" I call out suddenly.

"What?" asks Jean, "Who's found who?"

"The Female Titan; she's found Eren!"

"Calm down," says Armin. "He's with the most skilled squad of titan slayers in the entire Survey Corps. That includes Captain Levi."

"Right, you're right of course. He's in the best hands possible."

"Umm, guys?" says Jean suddenly. We both turn to look at him. He's suddenly turned pale and is staring down at the ground. "When we told to keep the titans out of the forest, we don't actually have to fight them right?" We both follow his gaze to where numerous titans of varying heights of gathered around the trunks of our trees. It reminds me all too much of being marooned up on top of the hall during the Battle of Trost.

"I, I don't think so," I reply, unable to take my eyes off the congregation of titans below me.

"No, we shouldn't have to," agrees Armin. "They're likely to be kept here by us as bait. I just hope the Commander knows what he's doing in the-

Suddenly there's a deafening roll of explosions from within the forest. It sounds like cannon fire of some sort. _"NO! NO! LET ME GO!"_ the voice more or less screams in my head, forcing me to put down hands against my temples in pain. _"NOOOOO!"_

"Shut up!" I hiss out loud. Armin looks at me questioningly. "I, I think they caught her. At any rate, something's gone wrong for her. She's screaming for something to let her go. I don't know how, but I think they must have trapped her somehow."

"I'd say that's good news," says Jean.

"Well, yeah."

"So why are you so pale then?"

"Oh. Well, hearing someone screams of panic inside your mind is a little, disconcerting."

"I imagine it would be."

"Is she still going?" asks Armin.

"No, she's gone quiet now. What's happening in there I wonder?"

"It's like you said," says Jean. "We're soldiers; it's really none of our business."

The next few minutes are more than a little troubling. The silence from inside the forest is broken a second time by another volley of cannon fire, but after that nothing. The titans continue to grope at the base of the trees eyeing us ravenously. The Female Titan maintains a chilly silence, or at least I can't hear her. It feels very strange trying to eavesdrop on someone's thoughts. I strain my mind desperately trying to pick up something, but all I can hear is something like a constant whispering. I can't make out any words in it though. It's louder than the last time I tried to listen and picked up however. I wonder if the massive group of titans has something to do with that.

Suddenly something occurs to me. "Hey Armin," I say, "I think I might be hearing titan's thoughts specifically."

"What makes you say that?" Armin asks.

"I can't hear the Female Titan right now, but I can hear a kind of whispering. I could hear it earlier as well, except it was quieter. I think the whispering is the ordinary titans' thoughts. If that's the case then there's not much going on in their skulls."

"That would actually make sense I guess. The thing that puzzles me is why you? No offence but I can't see any reason for you to be able to hear titans' thoughts more than anyone else."

"Neither can I." As I say it something nags at the back of my mind. Almost like some subconscious part of my brain is trying to tell me something. The feeling disappears pretty rapidly however.

A creaking sound draws my attention downwards. One of the titans has grasped the bark of the tree trunk in its hand and is trying to pull itself up. "Uh, Armin. I think they're trying to climb." Armin is already looking down at the titan. Reaching up with its free hand the ten metre tall giant grabs a second handful of tree bark and begins to haul its body of the trunk.

Over the course of the next minute multiple titans attempt to climb up the trees. Eventually all of them fall down to the ground again. Each time an attempt is made the titan reaches a greater height. Finally, when an elven metre manages to reach a height almost level to my own by bracing itself against a tree on either side I've had enough. "I'm cutting its nape," I announce before stepping neatly off the branch and grappling onto the titans head. A quick spin around the monster's head and I'm perfectly lined up.

The titan can't move beyond turning its head to look at me. If it were to move either its arms or legs it would plummet back down to the ground. My first strike is too shallow, but my second cuts deeper. With a creaking groan the titan's now lifeless body plummets down towards the forest floor. Calmly I swing back to my branch. "I suppose we can just do that every time one gets up too high," says Jean, his voice still nervous.

I slump down to a seating position, legs swinging freely over the drop. Funny how having ODM Gear makes any fear of falling seem unnecessary. Under normal circumstances I'd probably be clutching at the main trunk of the tree and trying desperately not to look down. Right now though I couldn't care less. There's a lot about me that's changed over the last five years. I've seen a lot of people die though, so that shouldn't come as much of a shock.

I feel different to how I did during the Battle of Trost. Back then all I wanted was to go home and never see another titan again. Right now I want to get home safely, yet I'm prepared to see this whole mission through. I guess that's experience. I doubt I'll ever stop being afraid, but it's nice to know that I may learn to trust myself more.

Then I almost fall off the branch as a terrible screech fills both my mind and my ears. If the Berserker Titan's banshee like howls were roars, then this is a scream. I can't think can't comprehend anything except the howling scream in my mind. It blots out everything, the sky, the trees, my friends, the titans, nothing exists except for that one echoing scream of terror.


	19. The 57th Recon Mission Part 4

Chapter 18: The 57th Recon Mission Part 4: Ankle Cut

Just as I feel that my head must explode the screech ends, both inside my head and out. I grip frantically at the branch beneath me. I'm conscious of my entire body shaking from the adrenaline. Something is, is calling me. I can feel a strange desire tugging at my mind subconsciously. 'I want, I want to go in. I want to go towards it!' It takes all my willpower to hold in place, my knuckles white as I grip the wood bellow men viciously.

Just as the desire begins to die I hear a rumbling noise from below my tree. I can't bring myself to move yet, so I don't look over. I can hear people around me shouting and moving around. But I mustn't move, not yet. I have to wait for the call to die. I have to wait just a little bit longer. There. I let out a long breath that I didn't realise I was holding and look around me.

People are swinging frantically down towards the forest floor. It looks like the entire right wing is on the move. And I can see why. All the titans that only moments ago were glued to the bases of our trees are rushing between the massive pines into the forest. 'The cry, she called the titans in! But, but what for?' I shake myself. 'Doesn't matter; our orders are to keep the titans out, so that's what we need to do. Time to earn a few more marks!'

Standing up straight I run along the rest of my branch to get some momentum before leaping off towards the mass of fleshy abominations. The titans ignore the soldiers surrounding them, even as many of them are cut down. All they seem to care about is getting inside the forest, getting to the origin of the call. I cut down a thirteen metre, only to let two ten metres and an eight metre past. There are more titans than there are soldiers to take them out.

Despite numerous kills by all hands, at least four dozen titans slip past and entre the forest. Afterwards everyone sits panting in the trees, titan blood steaming from a hundred pairs of blades. "What, what now?" I gasp.

"No idea," responds Armin breathlessly. "There were just, just so many of them."

"I'd say, that you have a few kills to your name after that."

Armin nods, still panting. "Can, can you hear anything from inside?" he asks.

"Not a word from her. After that yell she went quiet."

"Was that some kind of summoning call?"

"I'd say so. I could feel it tugging at me the whole time."

Armin looks at me sharply. "Matthias," he says gravely. "I couldn't feel a thing."

"Does that mean that the command was telepathic?"

"Probably. As strange as it seems, I think somehow you've been connected to some kind of psychic network between the titans."

"How? I didn't do anything to connect myself. The first time I heard anything like that was when the Female Titan first..." my voice trails off as I remember. "No, wait. It wasn't the first time. When we were first given our cloaks about a month ago, I heard someone. They sounded like they were very far away, but I could make out the words. They said that it would only be for one month, and then it would all be over. I thought I was just imagining it at the time."

Armin frowns as he considers this new piece of information. Eventually he looks at me, his face still grave. "I think that was our insider; the one who attempted to betray Eren's position. It could have been the Female Titan herself I suppose, though I can't imagine who they might be."

"No, the voice was defiantly male."

"That more or less confirms that the traitor must be among the former cadets of the 104th. I think we can assume that you, myself and Mikasa are all clean. And Jean cleared himself earlier. If we could check everyone's original copies of the plan, we could narrow down the list of suspects that way. The traitor has to have received one of the plans with Eren in the right wing." He sighs, "I just can't imagine any of us betraying each other like that. I thought I knew all of them so well..." his voice fades away into silence as he contemplates the horrible situation before us. One of the people we went through training with, one of the people we'd trust our lives to, is a traitor to mankind.

 _"I'll have to time this right."_

"Armin, she's speaking again."

Armin leaps to his feet, "what is she saying?"

"She says she needs to time something right. I'm afraid I've no idea what she's talking about."

"Either way, it seems likely that she'll break free again. Some of the best soldiers in all of humanity are in there, but even they can't defeat the number of titans that got through."

"We have to do something then don't we?" I ask jumping to my feet. "There's got to be something we can do! We'll be hard pressed to make it back to the Walls with her on our tail the whole way."

"I don't see what we can do. We don't know where the titans are actually heading, or whether or not the Commander might have some sort of contingency plan in motion. Though, I can't really see how anyone could foresee this." I clench both hands into fists and begin pacing angrily up and down the branch. "Try not get yourself worked up over this. Eren's titan power should give him some defence if he comes under attack, plus he's with the best soldiers in the entire human race. I doubt we'd be able to do anything to sway the outcome of events."

"You're probably right," I admit three minutes later. "Sitting still doesn't exactly feel good though." Armin looks uncomfortably at the ground, but says nothing. Suddenly there's the cracking sound of a flare from within the forest and the yellow tendril of the withdraw signal rises up above the canopy.

The relief of the soldiers around us is evident. "Oh thank god!"

"I'm gonna live!"

"The brass has finally seen sense; we're getting out of here!"

I however do not feel anywhere near as happy. All everybody else can hear is each others' celebrations. I can hear another voice that they can't.

 _"Good. If they're all recalling it opens up their defences."_

The Female Titan is out, and she's on the move again. "Hey Armin," I say, turning to my blonde haired friend. "I'm not regrouping with the rest of you just yet. I may need you to cover for me. I'm going." Without waiting for his response I hook into the next tree along and fire myself through the air with the greatest possible speed. I can hear Armin's voice behind me, but I block it out. I have to find Eren; I have to do something to stop her.

Agility tests were always my favourite part of training. Making it from one side of the challenge to the other was usually not that difficult. So, myself and those others who were highly competent with the 3D Gear would challenge each other to see who could complete the course fastest. Speed was always my strong point, and it's always been a source of personal enjoyment for me. I can just ignore everything else and concentrate on precise movements. Time slows down, and you can spend all the time you want making sure you get the shot as precise as you need it to be. Right now I'm relying on my speed more than I ever did in past combats. Before it was my own life in the balance, but now it's the life of someone far more important.

I hear the crack of another flare and above the dark green of the leaves a green signal rises into the air. A few seconds later a second signal rises into the sky not far away. _"Perfect. They've told me exactly where they are. This time I won't be lured in so easily."_

'Those signals," I realise. 'She's homing in on them. But how does she know which is her target? Wait, did she send up one? How's that possible when she's a titan?' The whole situation confuses me no end. I decide to head after the first signal since that's the nearest to me. Each tree sends me flying the lengths of a dozen more as I carve a rapid straight line towards the flare.

 _"That was lucky. I can't expect the others to go down so easily."_

Faster, faster. I don't really even know what it is I hope to do. I was unable to do a thing the last time I encountered the Female Titan, I fail to see why this time should be any different. But I can't allow myself to run away without doing something.

 _"Here we go."_

Far away in the distance between the trees a bright light explodes into existence. Yellow lightning crackles in all directions. The sight brings me to a stop, hanging limply by a single cable. Pain lances through my skull as the light burns at something in the back of my mind. I know that light, I've seen it before. 'Why can I never remember anything? So many strange things seem familiar to me, but I can remember none of them. I can hear the thoughts of titans but I've never done anything that could possibly allow me to. What's happening to me?!'

 _"No! How did they do that? Stay calm, focus."_

The voice of the Female Titan brings me back around to my senses. Blasting gas to get myself moving again I swing forwards between the trees, resuming my route forwards.

 _"Almost ready. Only a few more seconds."_

I'm now roughly equal to the point where the first flare was fired from. There's nothing here. Besides the flash came from further up ahead, closer to where the second flare was fired. She must have fired the first one to attain their position. They wouldn't have been expecting someone inside the Scouts to betray them.

 _"That was too close. I can't let myself slip up like that again. I'm sorry Eren, but there's someone who wants to meet you."_

Suddenly a second equally bright yellow flash erupts into being. This is followed shortly afterwards by a roar just like the ones from Trost. The roar echoes both inside and outside my head. 'What on earth is going on up there?'

I can hear crashing and thumping from up ahead. Then the sound of breaking timber and wood splintering.

 _"I should never have done it,"_ growls a second voice in my head. This one is male, filled to the brim with fury and hatred. It's growly, animalistic and thick, yet not deep throated. _"Should have transformed and fought her straight away. I put my trust in my comrades, and look at where it's gotten them!"_

"Eren?" I find myself wondering aloud.

 _"He's certainly enthusiastic,"_ hisses the Female Titan. _"But he doesn't have proper control over himself. He's letting his anger overwhelm him."_

Bizarrely, it seems that I'm hearing the thoughts of the two titan shifters individually. Neither appears to be able to hear what the other is thinking like I can. It feels like I'm listening to two separate running commentaries of events.

 _"Just you wait Bitch,"_ growls the Berserker. _"Once my hands heal, I'll tear you apart piece by piece. Then I'll DEVOUR YOU!"_

 _"Enough of this!"_ snaps the Female Titan.

Finally, I can the tow of them through the trees up ahead. The Female Titan appears to have been pinned down by the Berserker Titan. As the two of them come into view however, the Female Titan flips the Berserker off of her, sending him sprawling. She climbs easily to her feet and faces her opponent calmly, raising her hands into a combat stance.

The Berserker does nothing to imitate her style, staggering back against a tree before finding his footing. He roars at the Female Titan, green eyes blazing like fire. Before he can run forwards however, she brings her right leg up in a neat swing, smashing it into the Berserker's neck. The blow completely decapitates him, sending his head thumping away onto the grass. The headless body falls forwards onto its knees, steam rising in a great plume from its neck as it attempts to repair the damage.

The Female Titan's cheek splits open, following the jaw line as she opens her mouth to its fullest extent. The flesh pulls away in sticky threads as she bends forwards, mouth open. She takes a single massive bite out of the Berserker's neck, taking the entire the nape away revealing Eren's body exposed. Spitting out the chunk of flesh, the Female Titan grabs Eren in her jaws and seals her mouth shut.

 _"Game over Eren. You always were too eager to make a good fighter."_

"No!" I hear myself screaming as I come hurtling out of the trees, both blades held ready, aiming for her ankles. This time I have the element of surprise on my side and I cut both Achilles tendons in two clean strikes.

 _"What?! How?"_

As the Female Titan falls forwards I pull up and fire into her back. I pull myself forwards and make a slashing cut down through her right shoulder. I cut through her deltoid and teres major, severing the various supporting tendons as I go. The human (and thus titan) muscle structure was one of the theoretical areas in which I made sure to excel. As my gear pulls me back up into the air above her, the Female Titan collapses onto her stomach as her right arm gives out. I strike again, severing the same muscles and tendons on her left side.

To be on the safe side I cut her spinal cord at the top of her laterals. My blades have gone blunt from all of these cuts, and I switch them out as I ready myself for a final strike. 'You've got nowhere to go, no way of defending yourself. You're dead!' "Raaaagh!" I throw myself straight down towards her nape. If I fail to properly make the cut the first time, I can always try again. She's not going anywhere.

I bring the swing home, blades lined up for a precision strike. My weapons strike, but shatter on impact. A jarring pain lances up my arms as the full force of my own blow shoots back up at me. Somehow her skin has hardened just around the weak spot to something at least as hard as stone. I fall head over heels forwards into the grass. Pieces of my shattered blades land scattered around me.

I look up to see her staring me in the face with her dull blue grey eyes. In terror I remember that I immobilised her only from the neck downwards. I don't even have time to scramble backwards before her head shoots forwards, mouth open to bite me in half.

At the last second I feel something grab at me from behind and pull me backwards. I watch as the Female Titan's jaws snap short of my waist. They do not however snap short of my right foot. Red hot pain rips up through me as her teeth cut clean through my right leg just above the ankle. I scream aloud as I land on a low branch, blood already pouring from the severed limb.

I grasp at the tattered ends of my boot, trying to cover up the injury with my hands. Blood quickly soaks them and begins to drip through. I continue to cry out in agony as my artery sends a crimson tide gushing from my leg. "Quiet," snaps my rescuer. "Keep pressure on that and you'll live. You did pretty well up until the point where you tried to finish the job."

I look up to see a short man with dark hair and grey eyes. Those eyes are looking down at me coldly. "You've wasted a good opportunity though," says Captain Levi. "She's almost back on her feet already." He's right. The Female Titan's Achilles tendons have completely healed and she's pushing herself up on her right arm now. The one problem with my cuts was that they were too shallow; she's healing fast.

Even as she rises back to her feet, a grey bolt shoots out from between the trees heading for her knees. The cut is good and the Female Titan falls forwards again. The newcomer aims for a neck strike but just like in my case their blades shatter on impact. Mikasa lands elegantly in a nearby tree before dropping both of her broken blades and drawing fresh ones.

 _"They just keep coming!"_ growls the Female Titan in frustration.

"How about you sit this next one out huh?" suggests the Captain. "When she went to bite you I saw a bundle of some kind sitting on her tongue. I'd say at a guess that was Eren." Without another word the Captain whizzes over to Mikasa's tree. I can see the two argue briefly, Mikasa showing a large amount of emotion the Captain speaking calmly and firmly. Despite his lesser stature Levi commands a great deal of authority and Mikasa seems to back down.

I fumble desperately at my wound. 'The artery, I need to find the major artery,' I tell myself as I try to examine the stump through the constant torrent of blood. I trace back the main source of the spurting blood to a cylindrical vessel and pinch it tightly. I cover the rest of the wound with my other hand in an effort to stem the bleeding from other smaller blood vessels. With the main artery blocked, the blood flow decreases extensively. I can tell that I've already lost a lot of blood though. My hands are so heavily covered in my own blood that I can't make out my skin beneath.

I look up to see the Female Titan push herself back up to her feet. She staggers slightly, seeming to only just manage to stand. Suddenly she spins around on the spot, swinging her fist towards the branch where Mikasa and Levi are standing. But the two of them are already gone.

Levi changes into a green blur as he slices her legs and ankles multiple times, bringing her once again to her knees. The Captain strikes again, spinning through the air with such incredible speed it's breath taking. He neatly immobilises her right arm and flies clear. Suddenly Mikasa rushes in, her movements seeming sluggish next to Levi's. "No stop!" I hear him shout as Mikasa moves in try for a second neck strike.

 _"You bitch!"_

Just like the last time Mikasa's blades shatter all to pieces against the Female Titan's hardened neck. This time though the titan's left arm is mobile and she moves to snatch Mikasa out of mid air. Before she can grab her though, a sudden impact pushes the Female Titan's arm backwards. Levi pushes off from the arm and hurtles towards her face, slicing through the tendons that hold up her jaw. As the Female Titan's jaw falls slack a slime covered bundle slides down her tongue towards the front of her mouth.

"Eren!" Mikasa exclaims. Levi moves in again, snatching Eren out of the monster's mouth before pulling away. He lands back on my branch, grunting in pain as he tries to put weight on his left leg.

"He's all right," announces the Captain, "disgusting, but all right." Mikasa lands next to the two of us, her face flushed with anger and the intensity of the moment. "Here," says the Captain hauling Eren's body into her arms. "You'll need to carry him until we reach the wagons." Despite the unpleasant coating of saliva over Eren's body, Mikasa hugs it tightly against her and kisses him on the forehead. "Ugh, love," mutters the Captain looking away.

"Come on you," he says to me. "I'm going to assume you can't make it back to the wagons without assistance." He lifts me up into a cradle carry as I attempt to hold my wound closed. "Try not to get blood on my clothes," warns Levi before firing off his cables and swinging away.

As we move as rapidly as possible through the trees I can hear a voice in my head, filled with despair. _"Nooo! Bring him back! I need him, bring him back! This nightmare is never going to end if you don't give him back!"_


	20. The 57th Recon Mission Part 5

Chapter 19: The 57th Recon Mission Part 5: Poor Homecoming

By the time we reach the wagons everything is spinning for me. I'm slumped into the back of a wooden surface, spots dancing in front of my eyes. "Get a field medic over here!" I can just hear the Captain ordering. Everything sounds warped and distant like things do underwater. Shadows begin to creep into the edges of my vision as someone bends over me. I can feel them tugging gently at my right hand which is still grasping the severed end of right leg.

"Come on," they prompt me, "I need you to move your hand so that I can get to the wound." The last part of me that's conscious manages to do as he asks me. Then, darkness fills up vision completely and I fall back in a fevered sleep.

When my eyes open again I can somebody standing over me, but they're not a soldier. They're a woman in a long dress. She has her back to me and is facing a man in a long scarlet robe with a hood that covers his face. Behind him there are three more similarly dressed figures. I can also see some body lying on the wooden floor. He's wearing a blue shirt with a dark velvet vest over the top. He isn't moving and appears to be dead or unconscious.

"You can't do this!" screams the woman.

"Stand aside madam," says the hooded figure, his voice calm and icy. "You have no authority in this matter."

"He's my son! You're not going to take him away from me!"

"On the contrary. And I'm afraid there's nothing you do about it."

Everything snaps back to darkness with the cracking sound a gun shot. Then I begin to feel cold creeping up my legs and into my arms. Soon my entire body feels like it's been buried in snow and I start shivering. My eyes open again to reveal an extremely hazy image.

There's some kind of pink mass in front of me, white vapours filling most of my vision. I can feel someone pulling at me from behind. A kind attachment seems to be holding me in place. Eventually I find myself falling backwards into someone's arms. The icy cold surrounding me is lessened as someone wraps a piece of some kind of clothing around my shoulders.

"We need to take him back to the village," says a voice that I immediately recognise. It's mother.

"All right, just try not to let anyone see him," responds a second person who I'm sure is my father.

"What are you so afraid of? He's just a child."

"I'm afraid of that thing." I can see the figure of my father point towards the shrouded mass I was just pulled from. I can see a faint dark outline inside the massive wall of smoke.

"But that's, that's not him. Is it?"

"It's a very long story Madeline. Suffice to say that this situation is likely to be complicated."

"It seems complicated enough to me already!"

"Look, for now let's just get him somewhere warm. He'll freeze to death out here otherwise."

Everything begins to fade again, darkness seeping back into my vision. "No," I try to say. "I need to know what's happening. Mom, dad, don't go!"

Even as I finish the sentence the last traces of light are swallowed up by blackness. I can still feel myself standing, but there's nothing around me. I look down at myself to see that I'm dressed in my Scouts uniform. Idly notice that my right foot doesn't seem to be damaged. Then I feel a rush of hot air over the back of my neck. Something grunts behind me, sending another breath over my shoulders.

Slowly I turn to see a fourteen metre class titan bent down on its knees, staring at me. It huffs and pants, straining forwards towards me. It looks as if something is holding it in place, like a leash around its neck. Except, I can't see anything holding it back. On the titan's forehead someone appears to have carved a single word. The red letters read: 'Freedom'.

"Hunt, hunt, hunt," grunts the titan, foam coating its lips as it strains against its invisible restraints. "Hunt, prey, devour, all!" I scramble backwards away from it. The titan stares at me, eyes filled with desire. "Freeeeeeedom," it growls.

"N, no," I hiss back.

"Free us!" the titan screeches, steam erupting from its jaws. "Free us!"

"Never! I'll kill you; I'll kill all of you!"

"No," says the titan. "You need us. You want us. Free us!" It yanks vainly at its tether, trying to reach me.

"I don't want you! I hate you, do you hear me! I hate you and I will kill you!"

The titan stops still suddenly. It turns its head slightly to the right, as if trying to look at something differently. "Can't kill yourself," it says simply. Then the titan begins to change, its flesh bubbling and rolling. Its body shrinks rapidly, its face compressing to more ordinary dimensions along with its arms and legs. Its hair shorten a little and becomes neater with clothes springing up over its body. Finally, still bent down on his knees and straining as if at an invisible leash is a perfect copy of myself.

"What are you?" I ask in a hushed whisper.

"A part of you," says the copy smiling broadly. "We've always been a part of Matthias Quinn. You can shut us up, pretend we aren't here. In the end though, you'll need us. In the end you'll need to be free!"

"No!" I shout in desperation.

My eyes snap open and I gasp for air. The first thing I realise is that I can't feel my right foot. Then I feel the wagon bumping underneath me. Then the images in front of my eyes begin to coalesce and come into focus. Historia is bending over me, eyes filled with worry. "Matthias, can you hear me?" she asks.

"Y, yes," I gasp. My breathing is ragged and I can feel sweat covering my entire body. "How long was I unconscious for?" I ask eventually.

"The last hour or so. We're almost home now. You've been talking in your sleep a lot; it sounded like a pretty bad dream."

"That's an understatement," I reply shivering. "I saw, my parents and something steaming in the snow. And there was a woman, trying to protect her child." I put a hand to my head and groan. "I feel terrible."

"I'm not surprised," says Historia, putting on a smile that looks a little forced. "You lost an awful lot of blood before." She bites her lip nervously. "Do, do you want to see?"

At first I'm not sure. Then I realise how stupid it is to put something like this off. I nod and she helps me to sit up. My head throbs slightly, but that goes quickly enough. I look down to see that my right boot has been removed and bandages wrapped around the stump of my right leg. Everything from halfway up my shin downwards is gone. The damage to the remains of that part of the limb must have been bad enough to require a field amputation.

I don't know what to say or do. Part of my right leg is gone. "I'll never walk again," I say. "I'm going to have to hobble around on crutches for the rest of my life."

"Maybe not," says Historia encouragingly. "They may be able to make an artificial limb for you."

"Maybe," I admit, "but, I won't be able to remain a soldier. I'm a crippled veteran at the ripe old age of fifteen!" I fall back into a lying position and look up at the sky. "What possible good can I be if I can't fight?" I ask bitterly.

"Don't say that!" snaps Historia. "I know this is going to be difficult to live with, but feeling sorry for yourself isn't going to help!" I look up in surprise. She's scowling at me, but there are tears in her eyes. "You can still do things outside the military Matthias. And your friends aren't going to suddenly think less of you. This isn't going to affect them like that. It won't affect me either; they won't stop being your friends and I won't stop..." she doesn't finish her sentence.

"Just please," she continues after a few moments, "don't start thinking like that okay?"

I bite my lip and look away. "I'll try," I concede.

"Thank you," she says smiling.

As the Regiment renters Karanese District the atmosphere is among the men and women of the Survey Corps feels very different to how it did when we set out this morning. There's no excited words exchanged, no confident gestures to people in the street. The soldiers hang their heads as if weighed down by a great burden. The attitude of the people is very different now as well.

When we set out only three hours ago, people cheered and waved us on in excitement. Now the locals just look at us in silence. Some have looks of sympathy, especially when looking at people like me, who have significant injuries. Most of the crowd however have looks of disdain and disappointment. Some even look at us in scorn.

"I can't believe this is what our hard earned taxes go towards," mutters a spectator loudly.

"Yeah," replies his companion, "you'd think the government could spend the money on something better than giving the titans free meals."

I feel sick. I know some people like Eren will be angry, but I'm not angry. I'm just overwhelmed with a sense of despair and loss. I've been told that the entire Levi squad perished in combat with the Female Titan. Four of Mankind's most skilled soldiers cut down over the course of less than thirty seconds. And not just them, over a hundred Scouts are missing or confirmed dead. 35% of the Regiment snuffed out in just a single mission. 'How can we ever hope to beat them when all we do is die? We failed to capture the Female Titan, and we suffered more casualties in a single mission than the Scout Regiment has in years.

'The Regiment won't be returned to full strength for years, possibly decades. Eren will be flung back into a dungeon and then handed over to the MPs. They'll kill him nice and quietly, and shut down Humanity's greatest hope for victory. It's over; we've lost.'

I look over to see a group of six or so children watching the wagon go past. Two of them are girls and are looking at me in sympathy. One of the four boys is looking away with his nose turned up, while another looks like he's trying not to throw up. The other two are staring at the Scouts in admiration however. Their faces are radiant in view of what I suppose must be their heroes. I know for a fact that many children want to grow up and become Scouts. The dream soon goes once they realise the reality of the situation.

'Kids like these, they're the ones who are going to suffer from Eren's demise. Their future is left insecure by it. The Colossal and Armoured Titans are likely to return and breach another one of the gates. We won't have any means to stop up the hole that time. Mankind will be wiped out.' I bite back a sob as the full reality of the situation hits me. 'We've lost more than our best hope of winning; we've lost any hope of winning at all. We're all going to die in the end now. There's no way we can survive, no possible way to beat them.'

I start remembering all the lives that have been lost to the titans. Thomas, Nac, Mina, Marco, Samuel, Peter, Clara, Liam, Cameron, Garret, Silvia, Eren's mom, Armin's grandfather, thousands upon thousands of people. Some of those people I watched die myself. 'Why? What's the point of all of this? Why is it all for nothing?!'

I can feel tears running down my cheeks now. Historia her arm around me comfortingly and I lean into her. Right now, all I want is for all of this to end.

Inside the Scout Regiment's HQ, the air is decidedly empty. The dining hall holds around half of the number it did the day before. The more experienced soldiers still talk together in low tones like before. The less experienced ones have fallen silent now. Most bolt down their food as if it were poison to them. I can understand why.

When you see a titan swallow somebody, the processes of eating and swallowing just feel wrong. I expected to feel like I did after Trost. In truth though I wish I did. After Trost I felt traumatised, but there was new hope and promise in the wind. Now there's nothing at all.

After talking with my Company Captain Mike Zacharius, I know that the next week I spend with the Scouts is likely to be my last. He says that they intend to at least attempt providing me with a prosthetic first, but from his tone of voice I'm not optimistic. The Survey Corp's small medical team are highly experienced with treating injuries in the field, but they lack the necessary experience for this kind of project. They say the job will most likely be passed over to the more advanced medical crews within the Garrison Regiment.

I find myself playing idly with my food, turning pieces of stewed meat over with my fork. "You know," says Armin. "You could always try eating it." I give a short muffled laugh at that. "Look, I know this is going to be hard to adjust to Matthias, but you'll manage I know it."

I look up at him, "will I?" I ask moodily.

"Of course you will."

I sigh. "You know, at first they were thinking about keeping the project within the Regiment. The crackpot first Captain seemed to love the idea of being able to make a fake leg for someone."

"Captain Hange?" pipes up Sasha from the end of the table. "I've heard a lot about her but I've never actually met her, what's she like?"

"A total nutcase," I say simply. "An awful lot like someone else I know."

Sasha sticks her tongue out at me and return to her food.

"I'm not really sure you should be talking like that about a superior you know," Armin cautions.

"You're probably right," I admit. "Still, it feels like all the Captains have something not quite right about them you know?"

"Uh, not really no."

"Well, take Captain Levi for instance. He's the best warrior I've ever seen and I won't deny that watching him fight was a privilege, but he's so cold on the inside. He doesn't express any emotion besides frustration to his subordinates and he never seems to care about what happens to anyone. Seems is the operative word here mind," I add.

"I suppose so," says Armin thoughtfully. "Just because he keeps his feelings in check doesn't make him a sociopath."

"I never said that. I said he wasn't quite right."

"Thanks for making that correction," says a cold voice behind me. I drop my fork in shock and look round. Captain Levi is standing behind me arms crossed. "Now if you two old women have finished your gossip session, the Commander wants both of you to report to the map room in ten minutes. Understood?"

"Yes sir," Armin and I say together. "And um sir, may I say how sorry I am if I've offended you," I add lamely. The Captain grunts and walks away.

"I did tell you not to talk about superiors that way you know," points out Armin.

"Oh shut up!"

Ten minutes later I hobble into the map room. I've been leaning on a crutch for the last part of the day. Climbing the stairs was certainly a challenge with only one working leg, but with Armin's help it wasn't too hard. In the centre of the room is a table on which spread a large map of a city. Sitting around the table are all four Captains of the Regiment, Mikasa, Eren and at the head of the table is Commander Erwin. "Take a seat," he says motioning towards a long bench draw up on one side of the table.

"Thank you sir," I say before carefully sliding both legs in between the table and the seat. I've been taking care not to bump the wound, since the nerve endings are still sensitive.

"Now that everyone is here we can begin. You've all been called her because we believe we have uncovered the Female Titan's identity." Eren, Mikasa and I all lean in closer in surprise. "She's a soldier, and a former member of the 104th Cadet Corps."

"Wait seriously?" gasps Eren. "We trained with her?"

"I'm afraid so yes. She's currently a member of the Military Police and likely one of those responsible for the deaths of Hange's test subjects. Her name, is Annie Leonhart."


	21. Stohess Part 1

Chapter 20: Stohess Part 1: Best laid plans...

"What?" asks Eren. "How? How do you know?"

Armin sighs. "It was all very obvious when you put all the facts on the table. The Female Titan had to be a member of the 104th Cadet Corps, since she was familiar with both me and Eren. She appears to have known me well enough to choose to spare my life, and she was able to cast aspersions on Eren's personal judgment as if from experience."

"What do you mean cast aspersions?" asks Eren in confusion.

"Matthias here has revealed a unique ability," explains the Commander. "During the Recon Mission he was able to hear the thoughts of both the Female Titan and you when you assumed titan form."

"Is, is that true?" asks Eren.

"Yes, it's true," I admit. "The Female Titan recalled that you always allowed your emotions to get the better of you, and she used both your name and Armin's. She also knew Armin well enough to guess that he was trying to distract her during our first engagement."

"But, but that doesn't prove that it was her," says Eren. "It could be anyone."

"There's more," says Armin. "I'm more or less certain that Annie was the one who killed the test subjects. Everyone checked out during the inspection, but the gear that Annie presented, well it wasn't hers. I always used to help Marco clean his gear, so I know where all the various dents and scrapes ought to be. Also, doesn't it seem strange that Marco didn't have his gear on him when he was found? I recognised the gear that Annie presented as Marco's, so she must have been the one who did it."

"Listen to yourselves," says Eren. "You're talking about Annie. She's our friend not a monster!"

"Eren," says Mikasa, "no matter how you look at it someone we consider a friend is a monster. Annie even shares a physical resemblance with the Female Titan, that's more evidence isn't it?"

"What kind of evidence is that? We don't have anything concrete to base this accusation off do we?"

"Think about the Female Titan's close combat skills," I say. "Who else in 104th was that skilled in hand to hand fighting? There were only a handful of gifted close combatants in the Corps. Annie is the only one who doesn't have an alibi."

Eren slumps down into his seat. He still looks like he doesn't want to believe it, but he can't think of any way to deny it either. I'm finding this hard to accept as well. It all makes sense though; I can't think of anyone else who fits the evidence so well. Now that I think about it, even the Female Titan's voice was a little similar to Annie's, just as the Berserker Titan's was similar to Eren's.

"As you all know the Scouts are being recalled to the Capitol," continues Erwin. "At around midday tomorrow we'll be passing through the city of Stohess. The target is currently stationed there so we intend to take that opportunity to trap her. The plan is to lure her into a series of underground tunnels that exist below the city streets. Once there she should be contained should she assume titan form.

"If she transforms before then, it will be up to you to contain her Eren."

"Umm sir," I begin nervously, "with all due respect, is we sure that's the best plan? I mean, last time Annie had no difficulty defeating Eren in combat. Eren's a skilled enough fighter but he's just not in the same league as her."

The Commander gives me an approving look-much to my relief. "There is more to the plan than simply relying on Eren's ability to take her out. While we hope not to have to face her above ground, we know that the Female Titan is vulnerable to the special target capture weapons. This far inside the Walls she will be unable to summon other titans to cannibalise her. Several of these weapons will be set up once the Female Titan appears and Eren's goal will be to lure her to that point."

"Thank you sir."

"Even with multiple back up options this plan still carries a great element of risk. For one thing we don't know what reaction to expect from the MPs. It's possible that they'll prove to be more of a hindrance than a help. Levi also suffered a broken leg during his combat with the Female Titan, so we won't be able to rely on his assistance." I glance at Mikasa who stares blankly at the table. The Captain grunts in frustration at the reminder of his current predicament.

"Matthias," continues the Commander turning to me. "According to Armin's report you were also able to hear the thoughts of one of the other traitors within our ranks a month ago. This implies that you may be able to hear the thoughts of a titan shifter even when they are in human form."

"Well, yes but, I can't hear Eren's thoughts now. I'm afraid I don't understand how my ability works. I don't even know how I have it."

"We're actually building a theory on that. When we learned of your ability we examined the census records from the village of Rieskrippe where you spent most of your childhood. As surprising as it may sound, your name does not appear on any census until nine years ago. Both your parents are recorded as living in the village for the past ten years. Your mother was also recorded as being sterile. Furthermore your medical records claim that due to an accident your memories only stretch back to nine years ago, around the time when you first appeared on records."

My mouth falls open in shock. "Sir, what exactly are you saying?"

"At the current time we're not sure. Your mother is currently living in the village of Granarber correct?"

"Yes sir."

"When the situation allows I think it best if you take some leave and go see her."

"Yes sir, thank you sir."

"Now, back to the matter at hand. We'll be keeping you close by the operation for as long as possible. If you detect are able to detect any thoughts from the target that imply she is aware of the current plan you are to notify us immediately.

The Commander looks very sternly at the four of us. "Now, I need to be certain I can count on all four of you to do your duty to Humanity. I am well aware that Leonhart was a friend of yours. However, if any of you feel that you will not be able to face her in combat I need to be informed now."

Silence. 'Could I fight her? Well, I suppose it doesn't really matter all that much since I can't effectively use ODM Gear. But am I prepared to betray her like this?' My mind flashes back to the Female Titan crushing the two Scouts when she first appeared. I found out afterwards that those were Luke Siss and Captain Dita Ness. The Captain had been the one in charge of teaching us Rookies all about the long range Scouting formation as well as bringing us up to speed on other Scout tactics. He was a very cheer man with a kind heart.

During the month we spent in training I also became at least partly acquainted with two of the Levi squad: Oulo Bozado and Petra Ral. Oulo seemed to enjoy lording his experience over the rookies, but in truth his false sense of arrogance was usually more of a source of comedy than respect. Still, he displayed some wisdom on a few occasions and he was a highly experienced soldier. Petra took a very deliberate interest in how the new recruits were fairing. She'd often check up on us to make sure that we were fitting in properly. Apparently she was always like that with new members. People said that it was because she would never get the chance to mother children of her own, since the only person she'd be content to have them by was the Captain, and he was most certainly not interested.

Looking at Levi now across the table I can't say that they were right about that last part. Still, that doesn't change matters. Almost two dozen other Scouts fell to the Female Titan during the mission. She killed them, Annie killed them. That's enough for me. "Yes sir," I reply adamantly. "You can count on me."

The next day as we pass through Stohess part of the Regiment breaks away from the main convoy slips into the streets. We wait inside the houses of people we can trust not to give us away and make our way towards where Eren, Armin and Mikasa are meant to be heading. If all's gone well, Annie should be with them. I'm straining to hear her thoughts but everything's quiet.

Every now and again Captain Hange gives me an inquisitive look to ask if I've heard anything, and each time I shake my head. The 'crazy titan lady' hasn't actually proved to be as manic as I thought she would be from first impressions. Really, I'd say suffers from personality shifts more than anything else. One moment she's acting like a small child about to unwrap a birthday present, the next she's dead a serious officer intent on completing her mission. It unnerves me a little bit, especially the intense curiosity she shows for my mental ability, but I'm starting to get used to it. Not that I think a person could ever get fully used to it.

Since we knew that he was in the clear as an insider, and because he's the closest in height and build to Eren, Jean is playing a decoy. He's wearing a dark wig and is ensconced in a carriage which is proceeding along the main road. Manoeuvre Gear has been secretly distributed to several squads who are ready to hand it out to others as they need. It seems like every contingency has been accounted for, yet I still don't feel at ease.

I've been outfitted with 3D Gear as well, even though using it in combat is impractical for me. Apparently due to my thought hearing ability I'm now something of an asset myself; they don't want to risk me being stranded in place where the Female Titan might kill me. I guess that should be gratifying.

I continue to strain my mind in an effort to hear something, anything, but there's only silence. This far away from the regular titans I can't even hear the whispering I could before. The four of them should be getting close to the underground passage by now. There's been no alarm raised so I guess things are working thus far. We're only a single block away from where they must be right now, so I should be close enough to hear something if my powers start to work again.

I lean against a table, panting. It's a lot harder to move around with only one leg. We've only been moving at just above a walking pace, and yet I feel as if I've just run a marathon. I close my eyes and listen closely, hoping to pick up something.

 _"Ugh, they shouldn't even have the word Military in their name,"_ says a voice in disgust. _"What a joke."_ I look up irritably to see who disturbed me, but no one in the room appears to have been speaking. In excitement I concentrate again, trying to pick up the voice.

 _"All right, here we are,"_ thinks Eren. _"All we have to do now is get her down these steps, and then we can interrogate her. I can't believe we're doing this!"_

"Captain Hange!" I call out excitedly. "I can hear Eren!"

The Captain instantly bolts over to me, getting right up into my face. "Really?" she asks, her eyes sparkling. "What's he saying? Or rather thinking?"

"Uh, not much," I say taking a step backwards to lean against the wall. "They've almost got her into the tunnels. I can't pick up any thoughts from Annie though."

"Hmm," ponders Hange, "I suppose it could just be a result of your powers being so all over the place. I wonder though..."

 _"What? Is she serious?"_ wonders Eren in exasperation.

I frown. 'What does that mean? Is who serious about what?'

 _"Does she really have phobia of enclosed spaces, or is she onto us?"_

"Uh oh."

"What?" asks the Captain.

"I think Annie's claiming to have a fear of enclosed spaces. She may be trying to find an excuse not to go underground."

Hange frowns, her face now very serious. "All right, we'll move to the roof. Squad 6 let's move! That includes you too psychic boy."

"Yes sir," I sigh, pushing myself onto my one foot and grabbing my crutch from where it's leaning against the wall. We all climb up the stairs onto the top floor, then swing out the window and onto the roof as quietly as we can.

 _"Dam it! Come on, please just come down here!"_ Eren thinks in desperation.

"I think we're going to be switching to the backup option," I warn as we lie flat below the line of the roof.

 _"This isn't happening, this can't be happening."_

Suddenly there's the loud blast of an acoustic round. Armin's fired the emergency signal! "Okay people let's move it!" orders the Captain. "Switch to Omni-Directional-Mobility Gear and follow me!" We all fly off of the roof top, heading towards the passageway.

Then, as we land on the roof on the opposite side of the street, a massive blast of yellow light explodes out of the street just ahead of us. I watch in amazement as gigantic bones materialise out of thin air, before being wrapped in thick strands of muscle and connected together by a network of ligaments and tendons. Skin forms rapidly over some of the body and hair sprouts out of the freshly flesh coated skull. The nape closes over the figure of Annie Leonhart and the Female Titan stands, steam rising from her body in the middle of the street.


	22. Stohess Part 2

Chapter 21: Stohess Part 2: Unleash the Monster

"Get out of the way!" I hear someone call as the Female Titan takes a swing at the roof top on which we're all crouching. I more or less have to throw my entire body as far as I can to the left to avoid the massive fist which smashes down into the tiles. I scramble onto my knees and lean against a chimney for support. It looks like everyone got clear in time to avoid the blow. Part of the roof has caved in and I can see two people huddled in the back of the room.

"Don't just stand there!" I shout to them, "Get out of here, go!" The figures hurriedly scramble over the pile of rubble and head for the door. It's just then it hits me for the first time. The city hasn't been evacuated and the people here don't know what's coming. A titan's already been set loose in the streets and a second one is about to appear to try to fight it. Dozens, no hundreds of innocent people are at risk here.

Holding one hand over the back of her neck the Female Titan bends over the street, tapping at the pavement and listening closely. _"Here,"_ says Annie's voice in my head. Suddenly she raises her foot high in the air before smashing it down through the cobbled road and into the tunnel below. From this angle I can see Eren, Armin and Mikasa just inside the tunnel.

'She's trying to pull them out. Either that or crush them!'

"Hey Quinn!" calls out one of the Scouts. "You need to get clear of here now. You're job's done kid; you're only exposing yourself by being out here!"

"All right!" I acknowledge reluctantly. I don't like the idea of having to face the Female Titan a second time, but neither do I like the idea of running away and abandoning my friends. 'If only there was something I could do! If only I hadn't lost my foot!' I turn and use my gear to grapple to a different roof top. The plan was that if fighting started in the streets I was to head to the centre of town and meet up with the supply teams. The supply teams are currently made up of the wounded from the last expedition, since we won't be much use during an actual fight.

 _"What? No not now!"_ thinks Eren in panic. _"Come on, I have a clear goal in mind, I caused self harm, what more do I need to do?!"_ That stops me up short. If Eren's having trouble transforming I have to tell someone.

I turn around mid swing to start heading back towards the centre of action. I fly through the streets which are already beginning to fill with confused and frightened people. Several Scouts are down on the ground trying to get people moving. "You need to evacuate at once! A titan has appeared only a few blocks away!"

"This is Wall Sina moron!" someone shouts. "The Titan's could never get this far in. This is some kind of trick right? I've heard about how you lot of crazies are in trouble with the government; you just want to cause trouble don't you."

"If you don't get moving soon it won't be me causing trouble for you!"

"Don't listen to this guy, he's full of crap!"

Suddenly there's another crash from a few streets down. Several people look concerned but none of them look as if they're prepared to run. "What the hell is wrong with you idiots?" I call out in disbelief from the top of a roof. "The titan is only a few streets down, why don't you at least move a few blocks away to be on the safe side?!"

"And why exactly should we believe anything you say kid?"

"Look at this," I say, pointing to my severed limb. "This is what happens to you when you face a titan and you get lucky. The odds are all of you will lose a hell of a lot more than part of your legs. You can start moving or you can get killed, it isn't really our problem!"

"What, what do mean by that?" asks a woman nervously. "You're soldiers aren't you? It's your job to protect us!"

"Yeah it is. But first and foremost our duty is to Humanity as a whole, and we can't afford to risk the good the human race by wasting time trying to convince you to leave. We've warned you already, if you die then our conscience is clear; we've done our job!"

'Okay, so maybe that's not all true, but these people need to start running now and if this is what it takes to get them moving then so be it.' Without looking back I keep moving down the street. I'm satisfied to hear the noise of some running footsteps behind me.

"That was nicely done there kid," says one of the Scouts as he catches up to me. "Though I suppose you know that what you said is not technically right."

"Yes well," I reply, "I probably meant more of it than I should have."

"Hang on a moment, shouldn't you be falling back to meet up with the supply teams?"

"Normally yes, but it sounds like Eren's having difficulty controlling his titan abilities. He can't seem to activate them."

 _"No wait! Don't do this!"_

"But doesn't our backup plan rely on-

 _"Shit!"_

There's another massive crash from several streets away. I listen intently for any more words from Eren, but he's gone silent. "I'm pretty sure plan B is a bust now," I say, trying to keep my voice calm. "We've still got plan C though."

"What makes you say plan B is a bust?"

"When that last crash happened, Eren just went quiet."

"Wait, you don't mean he's dead do you?"

"I don't know. Point is it sounds like Eren's titan form won't be making an appearance. Where's Captain Hange?"

"At the planned position setting up the traps."

"Good, we're going to have to try and lure the Female Titan there ourselves."

The Scout frowns. Suddenly I realise that I've been talking like I'm in charge. He's far more experienced than I am and it's possible that he outranks me as well. "Oh, sorry I-

"Don't worry about it kid. I'd say you're right. I'm going to round up as many of us as I can and try to force in the direction we want her to go. You however need to get out of here; you're in no condition to fight right now. Since you seem to be able to pick some valuable bits of information, go rendezvous with the Captain. You'll probably be more useful there."

"Right." I nod and head towards the trap point. The plan was for it to be only a few streets away. Far enough away that Annie couldn't notice it, but close enough that we could lure her there quickly. Back away at the point of origin I can hear the sound of large feet along with the occasional crash.

 _"I'm not going to die here!"_ hisses Annie with determination. _"You won't take me do you hear! Securing the coordinate is impossible now; I'll have to leave it up to them. For now I just need to get out of here."_

'You can run as far as you want Annie, but were not going to let you escape. Not this time.'

I land clumsily, falling straight onto my backside with a jarring impact. One of the Scouts looks over at me. "Hey Matthias, weren't you supposed to head back to meet up with the supply team?"

"Change of plans Shultz," I explain, righting myself as best I can. "I need to speak to the Captain, where is she?"

"Right here," says Hange who's just climbed back up onto the roof. "What is it?"

"I'm not sure why, but Eren's having difficulty transforming. The Female Titan's been punching holes in the road in an effort to get at him. I think Eren may have been crushed. Plan C's the only option left so we're trying to lure her here ourselves."

Hange looks grave. "That means that we'll only have the one shot at this. She'll never let herself get caught again if we mess this up. You stick around here Matthias; it looks like you're going to be more useful to us where we can talk with you."

"Yes sir,"

"Let me know if you hear anything that might imply she's aware of the trap."

Over the next two minutes there's a constant stream of crashes and smashes as the Female Titan more or less demolishes her way here. Frightened refugees come pouring past the street on occasion. Apart from that we're alone. The Military Police hardly seem to be reacting to the threat of the Female Titan. At one point I see a squad of them away in the distance but they don't come any closer. "Cowards," I mutter. "They're deliberately avoiding this area. What sort of soldiers are they?"

"Very bad ones," replies Shultz with a laugh. "There was a time many of those in the ranks of the Scouts would have given their right arm to be one of them. Now, all we can do is look at them in disgust."

I remember Eren's words to Jean eight months ago. Jean had been bragging about how he was going to enter the Military Police. Eren had gotten all heated up over it. "You're not a soldier, you're a joke!" he'd said. I'd say that sums up the Military Police rather well actually. None of them have ever even seen the enemy they're supposed to be able to fight. Odds are these MPs never even expected to have to fight any titan, never mind a shifter's titan.

Then, the sound of booming footsteps comes around the corner and the Female Titan smashes her shoulder into a building on the end of the street. I can't actually hear any coherent thoughts from Annie, but I can sense a feeling of frustration and panic. She feels trapped inside of this city. Boy does she have no idea.

Several soldiers on ODM Gear swing around her head like flies and as I watch she swats one of them out of the air. One of the soldiers takes this opportunity to slice her left knee, causing her to stumble forwards. Growling she clambers back to her feet and runs down the street. 'Come on, that's it. Just a little bit further.' As the Female Titan enters the trap point her eyes widen as she sees the capture weapons.

"Fire!" calls the Captain and a hail of harpoon cables dig themselves into the Female Titan's flesh. As the wires pull on her she staggers, then falls forwards into the road.

 _"No! No not this again!"_

"Captain," I call out. "I think she noticed the trap!" That prompts laughter from many of the other Scouts. The Captain however is already down in the street bending over the downed titan.

"Oooh, look at you," she giggles, her eyes round. "This is going to be the most excitement I've had in ages." She pulls out one of her blades and starts examining the Female Titan's eye. "I can't believe some people actually contemplated killing you. No, that would be a terrible waste. Ever single square centimetre of your flesh has its own fascinating story to tell. I intend to read you like a book!"

 _"No! Get off of me!"_ The Female Titan thrashes madly at the cables embedded in her and manages to free her foot. She makes a large swinging kick and shatters several of the capture weapons. Ripping away from many of the others she scrambles back to her feet. With several weapons still stuck into her she sprints away, staggering several times.

"Blast!" exclaims Hange landing back on the roof. "We didn't have time to rig up enough traps to properly restrain her!"

"What do we do now then?"

"Our only option left is to try and bring her down the old fashioned way. Levi and I devised a method by which we could extract Eren from his titan form without killing him. It involves cutting out the entire nape in a single strike. More than likely it will sever her limbs at the joints, but at this point I really doubt her personal condition matters all that much. We just have to stop her getting out of here."

She hurries to the edge, "all right everybody listen up! That titan does not leave this city! Our primary goal is to remove Annie Leonhart from its nape. Keep her inside the city limits at all costs! Squads six and nine with me, the rest of you fan out and try to get people clear!"

"As for you Matthias," she continues in a far quieter voice. "I want you to follow on behind us, but keep your distance. You're not capable of landing properly so take things slowly all right?"

"Okay. I'll let you know if I pick up anything else from Eren."

Hange nods and takes off followed by Squads six and nine. The rest of the soldiers head off to either the far left or right. Some are moving to outflank while others are trying to clear the streets. I hurriedly crawl to the edge of the roof top and throw myself off. Once I'm in the air moving around is much easier. Landing thus far has been more based around falling, but I'm still able to perform standard manoeuvres with relative ease. Down the street, around the corner, below a bridge and around a spire.

As I move my mind starts working at something. I'm not sure why, but my fever filled dream is starting to surface. I remember my mother and father standing around me, I was so cold. The Commander had said that they had a theory to explain my mental powers, but they never told me what exactly it was. The steaming form in the snow, it was so much like, so much like a...

 _"We've always been a part of Matthias Quinn."_

'How do you tap into a mental network only titans use?'

 _"It's a child Andrew not a_ _ **monster!**_ _"_

'How can a person suddenly appear on the records, as if they were born at the age of six?'

 _"It's too cold out here for someone his age."_

'The snow, the cold. That tree by the river!'

Suddenly the memories I've been having in short flashes coalesce and I see a single clear chain of events. I remember falling from somewhere high. I fell down into a valley full of trees and rolled down the hill side. I crashed into a tall pine tree then lay still. Everything went dark for a little while as my second pair of eyes stopped working. Then, I came out, out into the cold air.

It was freezing and I began shivering almost straight away. The heat coming from the steaming body in front of me wasn't enough to drive away the chill. Then my mother came and pulled me out. My father objected, said I was too dangerous. My mother didn't care though; she only saw the child that came out, the monster dissolving in the snow didn't matter. In the end my father agreed to take me back, at least for a short time.

Then, I can remember very little. I know I spoke with them even though I was probably delirious. I remembered nothing from before, and the first thing I asked them was if they were my parents. In the end, my mom said that was right. I can remember feeling safe after that. And that tree, the one where my old body dissolved and melted into the snow was always a special place for me, even though I could never remember why.

My new mother and father loved me and took care of me and I had no idea where I had come from. Then dad left one day and mom took me away to another village. Then another, then another and then to the city of Shiganshina. And finally I met some people who didn't look at me in a strange way. I never understood why the villagers in Rieskrippe never liked me, why parents wouldn't let their children play me. They respected my parents enough to leave me be, but they didn't want their children to play with a monster.

As all of these memories come flooding back I nearly fall out of the air. I manage to stabilise myself and hang limply from the corner of a three story house. Then an idea comes to me. I swing back into the air, throwing myself high above all of the buildings so that I can see down into the streets bellow. I see the Female Titan and move in on her.

I come to a skidding stop in road ahead of her. "Hey Leonhart!" I call out. She stops and stares at me in confusion.

 _"What's he doing?"_

"How about you try picking on somebody your own size!" The last clear thought I have before being swallowed by a blinding yellow light, is that biting my own hand hurts far more than I expected it to.


	23. Stohess Part 3

**A quick warning beforehand. There is a fair bit of titan vs titan stuff in this chapter and when I write that things tend to get more violent than usual with a lot more physical trauma to the combatants due to the Titans greater physical strength.**

Chapter 22: Stohess Part 3: Broken Wall

As the initial curtain of steam blows away on the wind, I throw back my head and roar. The sound echoes off of the houses and bounces back into me. The first thing I notice is that everything is much smaller. The buildings that once were more than seven times the size of me, are now low enough for me to place my hands on their roofs. The soldiers in the streets are now more like the size of mice than people. And finally the Female Titan, who once loomed far above me in height, I can now stare straight in the eye. And that's because I'm one of them; I'm a titan!

'You know what? I really don't care all that much. Or at least not as much as you might expect me to. If this is what I am, then so be it. Right now is all that matters, the past can go to hell!'

 _"He, he remembered!"_ I hear Annie gasp inside my head. _"How much does he know?"_

'Not all that much bitch, but enough for now!'

 _"Wait what? How, how did you do that?"_

'You, you can hear me?'

 _"What are you doing? How is this possible?"_

'I don't know, and I don't care. All that matters now, is that I'm sending you straight to hell!'

I let out another roar and charge forwards. I've never been particularly strong physically, so I never fought successfully head to head with anyone. Ironically it was by watching several of Annie's techniques that gave me the idea to play to my strengths rather than to someone else's. I'm fast and agile, so I make use of that advantage. After I altered my fighting style, I was able to hold my ground against most of the others in the Corps. I never beat Annie though. No one ever beat Annie.

The strength of my titan body is far greater than that of my human body. Using that increase to my advantage I leap onto the roof to my left then leap right over my opponent's head. The Female Titan spins as I land, but I'm able to attack fast enough to get in a blow on the side of her head. The punch does far more than it would during a normal combat. Since titan bodies are so light in comparison to their strength, the blow sends her flying backwards to the other end of the street.

Trying to press my advantage I rush forwards. As I get close she flips up onto her feet and takes a swing at me. I duck it and shoulder charge right into her. That sends her sprawling yet again. This time however she's right at my feet. The Female Titan kicks my legs out from under me and I fall into road. I grab hold of the gutter of one of the buildings and pull myself up in time to see her kick me square in the face. That sends me back to the other end of the street.

Grunting I climb back to my feet and stand eyeing her off. The Female Titan watches me for a few moments, before turning and running away down the streets. 'No! Get back here you coward!' I scream in my head. At the same time my titan body snarls loudly sending a small cloud of vapour into the air.

I set off after her at a run; sprinting for all that I'm worth. I can't let her escape. She escaped last time and if she gets away this time then Eren is done for. Any possibility of exoneration for the Scout Regiment will be gone if she gets away. I thunder down the road, taking the numerous sharp corners as best I can. I know that it's possible that there are people in these buildings, so if I fall into one of them I may end up crushing them. My body is fresh though, while Annie's has been fighting for the last ten minutes. Slowly yet surely I gain on her.

I'm only a few metres behind her now and the Female Titan is still ignoring me. Leaping forwards I tackle her to the ground. With my arms wrapped around her legs I bring my elbow down on her spine as hard as I can. She lets out a screech as I manage to dislodge several vertebrae. She rolls over rapidly, sending my face into the brick wall on my right. I can feel a large portion of my skin being ripped apart. I know that my body should be able to heal the injuries fairly quickly, but it doesn't make it hurt any less.

With a snarl I yank myself forwards and smash my fist into her middle. The blow is so intense that my fingers partially shatter, prompting small amounts of steam to begin escaping through the skin. The Female Titan howls in pain as her internal organs are crushed. She doesn't need them to survive, but the pain must be extensive. She whips one fist into the right side of my head and smashes my skull into the pavement.

I can feel a large portion of it cracking, and my vision goes blurry as I suffer damage to my brain. Kicking me in the stomach the Female Titan sends me backwards and up, freeing up her legs properly. She scrambles to her feet and brings back her right foot to cave in my head. I push myself up in time to dodge the blow though, and throw my entire body into her legs, biting her shin. I've never been in a fight like this before. Even those few fights I ever had with bullies weren't as dirty as this one.

The force of the impact causes the Female Titan to stagger backwards into a line of houses behind her. Scrambling backwards I clamber hastily to my feet. The two of us stand facing each other, great clouds of steam billowing up into the air. Normally I'd be panting except a titan form doesn't need to breathe. The right half of my face feels like it's on fire, and my right eye is blinded by a swathe of white gas rising from the wounds on that side.

I raise both hands in a combat stance, bending my knees slightly. Even though I'm not panting, I already feel tired. The Female Titan takes up a similar stance, the last traces of steam blowing away on the wind as her wounds heal. She darts forwards and shoots out a punch towards my head. I dodge to the left but her other fist flashes out and hits me straight on. I fall backwards several steps and roll out of the way as her foot comes smashing down. I lunge upwards and manage to catch her on the jaw.

I buy myself only just enough time to slip between her legs and come up behind her. Her jaw returns to its original place with a resounding snap. She spins and aims a kick at my head. I duck it and move to the right. 'There isn't enough space here for me to fight properly. She has the better stance and more experience fighting than I do. Her blows are stronger and more coordinated than mine. I can't win like this!'

 _"To, hell with this is,"_ growls a voice. At first I can't recognise it it's so distorted by rage and pain. _"I'm not going to just lie here and die!"_ roars Eren.

The Female Titan charges me, hitting me hard with an uppercut that knocks me six metres into the air then onto my back. My face burns as it tries to knit itself back together again.

 _"No more worrying about what's right and what's wrong!"_

I roll into the corner formed by the building and the road as she stamps down into the street.

 _"Just kill! Consequences be dammed!"_

I catch her foot as she tries to crush my face in and manage to throw her backwards.

 _"Because it is a cruel world!"_

I push myself up into a seating position only to see the Female Titan ready to smash down on my already damaged head. Then a massive explosion of yellow energy tears into the sky twenty or so blocks away. The Female Titan freezes and turns to look. I should probably have taken advantage of the opportunity but my gaze is fixed on the skyline also.

'Eren.'

 _"Shit!"_ exclaims Annie.

 _"I'm going to kill you bitch!"_ roars Eren.

I can hear the sound of his feet pounding against the ground as runs towards this point. 'All I have to do is keep her here. Eren can handle the rest.'

I throw my body forwards and smash my damaged head into her stomach. The impact sends bright lights flashing into my eyes, but it knocks her down. I leap onto the Female Titan and grapple with her, forcing her into the ground with my knee on her chest. I punch down towards her head. She dodges and wraps her legs around my head.

She tears me off her and I impact hard into the ground. My skull feels like it's in a million pieces and my vision is practically worthless. The sound of Eren's foot falls is getting steadily nearer though, I just have to hold her for a little longer. I swing a right hook at the largest fuzzy shape in my vision and manage to connect. The Female Titan spins and falls against the buildings again.

A savage roar of aggression draws my gaze to the right. I spot the Berserker Titan just in time to throw myself out of his way. He hits the Female Titan head on, smashing in her head with his fist. I stagger backwards, my sight slowly clearing as steam hisses from my eye sockets. The Berserker Titan has the Female Titan pinned against the wall and takes a second wild swing at her head. She dodges the blow and tries to throw him off, but he shoves her into the ground with the heel of his foot.

 _"You're not going to escape, you're not going to win; you're only going to die!"_ snarls Eren.

The Female Titan punches him in the side of the head, knocking him back a few steps. With a resounding howl the Berserker Titan throws himself in again, smashing his head directly into hers.

My eye sight is pretty much restored now and most of the steam that was rising from my face has gone. For the first time I look down at myself. Unlike the Colossal or Armoured Titans mine has skin covering its entire body. It appears to in many respects simply be a larger version of my own; not particularly thickly set with a lean muscular frame. I'd say I was just a little bit under fifteen metres tall. I can feel that my teeth are different, mainly in the fact that there are a lot more of them. My teeth extend back almost twice as far as before and the flesh of my cheeks feels thinner when I run my tongue over it, as if it could come apart easily.

Suddenly I hear the sound of ODMs firing behind me and turn. Several people have landed on the roof behind me. In surprise I realise that they're Armin, Mikasa, Jean and two other Scouts I don't know. Armin is looking at me in astonishment and Mikasa looks about ready to cut my head off. 'Hang on, they don't know. They don't know it's me!' I hastily put one of my hands over the back of my neck. It would be a pretty poor way to go to be killed by my own friends on accident.

"Where did that one come from?" asks one of the Scouts, looking at me incredulously.

"Does it really matter?" asks Armin. "He fighting with her only a few moments ago wasn't he?"

"Hey!" calls out Jean walking to the edge of the roof. "Can you understand what we're saying?"

I nod.

"Who exactly are you?"

I open my mouth and try to speak, but the words won't come. In frustration I realise that my titan body doesn't seem to have formed with vocal cords. I point at my throat and shake my head.

"You can't talk?" asks Armin.

I nod.

"Look we don't have time for this," snaps Mikasa. "Eren needs our help!" Everyone looks over to where the Berserker Titan is still wrestling with the Female Titan.

"What exactly do you expect us to do?" asks Jean. "There's no way we could get near the two of them without being crushed in the process."

There's a whopping noise from behind me and a figure flies past to land on the roof with the others. "Ha ha!" laughs Captain Hange. "I just love it when one of my theories turns out right. Hi up there!" she waves excitedly at me. "I really had no idea you were about to pull that on us Matthias!"

The others all look at her in shock.

"Wait, that's Matthias?" asks Armin pointing at me.

I nod.

"But, when. How?"

"Never mind that now," says Hange. "We need to focus on getting people out of here. I doubt Eren is willing to let anyone else in on his fight right now, so I've sent most of our troops to help with evacuating the city. Matthias, I want you to stay close to the fight so that you can help out when possible. With two of you here you should be able to handle this."

I nod and turn to face the ongoing brawl. The Berserker Titan and Female Titan are both on their feet facing each other. The Berserker charges forwards with a roar and attempts to tackle her to the ground. She dodges to the side though and smashes the Berserker into what's left of one of the houses at this T junction. Almost all of them have been levelled by now. The Female Titan punches the Berserker's head numerous times.

 _"Don't get up."_ Annie growls.

I run forwards and jump over Eren's fallen titan body. I smash my right fist into her shoulder, dislocating it and sending her down into the road around the next corner. As I move in she braces herself and shoves me in the gut with both feet. I fly backwards into the houses behind me and before I can react she smashes her fist into my face. Everything turns blurry as she draws back for another swing. I throw myself forwards into the street dodging under her swing.

I elbow the Female Titan in the back of her knee, causing her to fall forwards. She spins and smashes my entire body into the building. Before I can get back to my feet she breaks away and runs. I can hear her panicked thoughts as she sprints as fast as she can towards the Walls.

 _"I have to get away! I can't win this, I have to get away!"_

I growl and run after her. A strange inside part of me seems to awaken and the chase becomes everything. The chase and the kill. I thunder down the streets vaulting over a line of houses to skip over a turning. I'm now in a parallel road to her, sprinting as fast as I can. It isn't enough though. The Female Titan continues to hold ahead of me despite my exertions.

'No, no no! Come back here! I won't let you escape!' I manage to increase my speed enough that she stops breaking away from me, but I can't get to her. Suddenly there's a howl behind me and I look back over my shoulder to see the Berserker Titan smouldering with his greens eyes flashing. He thunders forwards twice as fast me and over takes the Female Titan as she comes out into the open.

Kicking him off desperately she leaps for the wall and digs in her hands trying to climb up. 'No you don't!' I let out a screech of hatred as I leap over the line of roofs ahead of me and crash headlong into the Wall. It isn't a proper attack, yet the force of my impact dislodges one of the Female Titan's hands. She hangs by a single set of fingers gripping desperately at the smooth grey surface in front of her.

There's a flash of metal and blood spurts from the Female Titan's hand as Mikasa slices her fingers off. She falls backwards towards the ground, landing with a spine breaking crack. I begin to move forwards, but the Berserker shoves me aside sending me sprawling.

 _"You're mine!"_ Eren howls in triumph. His titan lunges forwards and rips off the nape of the Female Titan, hurling the flesh away. _"This is freedom!"_ I hear Eren snarl viscously as he looms over Annie's exposed body.

 _"Father, I'm sorry. I won't be able to come back."_

'He's going to devour her! Eren stop it!'

 _"No! This is my prize!"_ The Berserker Titan leans in, jaws open wide. Then stops suddenly, staring. _"What?"_ Blue light blazes from the two titan's bodies, the Berserker's arms merging with the Female Titan's back. The Berserker howls in pain and anger, tugging furiously at his trapped limbs. A dark blur zips past my face and cuts out the entire nape on the Berserker Titan in a single clean strike. Eren's body bursts out of the titan's flesh, his arms severed just above the wrists.

Captain Levi tears him free from the last strands of red muscle. Swinging down to the ground the Captain deposits Eren's limp hand and footless body on the grass. I rush forwards towards the Female Titan. Steam has begun to rise from the two corpses, flesh melting away to reveal charred bones. I shove Eren's steaming titan body out of the way and bend over the nape of the Female Titan.

A brilliant blue gem about two metres long and one metre wide has formed around the body of Annie Leonhart. Her eyes are closed and she lies unmoving inside the crystal. I rip the gem out of the decaying flesh and hold it in my hands, staring at the girl inside. 'What is this stuff? It looks similar to the Female Titan's hardened skin. Did Annie summon it as a last line of defence?' Growling I apply pressure to the surface of the giant diamond, trying to crack it open. No matter how hard I press though, the hard semi-transparent surface remains unbroken. I let out a roar of frustration and slam the gem down on the ground. All that does is send chunks of earth flying into the air.

Soldiers are beginning to crowd around now, all of them staying a safe distance away from me. Mikasa rushes over to Eren's side while a dozen or so Scouts cautiously approach the crystal where I've thrown it. Captain Hange strides over to the large gem with a curious but serious look on her face. I can't hear what she-or anyone else-is saying at this distance. I push myself back to my feet and look around.

As stand up people back away from me nervously. I feel so tired after all of this, I just want to lie down somewhere. 'How do I get out of this thing?' I try to open my eyes, but they feel as if they're already open. I explore my mind trying to find some sort of signal point by which I can detach myself from this thing. As hard as I try though I can't find anything like that. 'Let me out!' My titan body grunts with anxiety as panic begins to well up inside me.

"Hey, Matthias!" calls out someone down below. I turn to see Armin standing a few metres away looking up at me. "You can come out of that thing now!"

'I'm trying to!' I try to say. All I manage to do is make a kind of yapping noise. Armin jumps at that then looks up at me worriedly.

"You can still understand me right?"

'Yes, yes of course'. I nod impatiently.

"Then, why don't you come down?"

'Because I don't know how!' I let out a snarl this time. 'Stop this,' I tell myself, 'I need to calm down.' I sit down with a thump and put my hands to my head.

"Matthias, are you all right?"

I shake my head. I bend over and start to gouge words into the dirt with my fingers. _'I don't know how to get out.'_ I write. Armin looks at the huge letters, trying to decipher them.

"Oh," he says eventually. "Can't you just do it? You know like moving your arm or something. You don't think about doing that; you just do it."

With a final effort of desperation, I simply try to do it. To my surprise I suddenly lose feeling in my entire body for a few seconds and everything turns black. My eyes snap open to stare at a network of red fibres beneath me. There seems to be some light filtering in through the skin behind me, bathing the chamber in an eerie pinkish glow. I realise all of a sudden that I can't breathe and tug at the red threads holding me down in panic. They snap away and the flesh behind my parts to allow my body access to the outside environment.

I gasp air into my lungs and rip my arms free from their fleshy restraints. Carefully I slide down the back of my titan body, reaching the bottom as it begins to dissolve. I hurry around to the other side, my legs shaky. "Armin!" I call out, staggering past the disintegrating mass behind me.

"Matthias!" he runs over and slips my right arm over his shoulder. "Just lean on me okay?" We both stagger over to the steps down onto the grassy plateau where my other body is now turning black.

"Hey," I start with surprise. "My foot grew back!" Armin looks down at my right leg in surprise. A new bare foot is sticking out of the end of my right trouser leg. "Ha ha! I'm not a cripple anymore!" I exclaim in delight.

"Um, Matthias. Do you actually realise the gravity of the situation right now?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I'm not really sure what I ought to say right now. I mean, I just turned into a fifteen metre tall monster, what do I say about that?"

"You could try starting with how."

"I'm afraid I can't. I've gotten back some of my memories now though. They're still pretty hazy, but I think I understand enough. My parents found me in the snow when I was a child. Only, it wasn't me me, it was that thing." I point to the blackened skeleton which is now beginning to crumble. "I came out of the nape and my mother; well she didn't want to leave a small boy to freeze to death in the snow. I'm not really sure about the rest. They took me in after that and never mentioned what I was to me. I didn't have the slightest idea until earlier, when everything seemed to line up in my mind."

Armin looks at me nervously. "So, you're still you?"

"Of course," I reply in indignation. "What did you expect?"

"I didn't know what to expect."

"Yeah, I guess that makes sense. Sorry."

Suddenly there's a massive cracking sound that prompts both Armin and me to look up. When the Female Titan was attempting to climb that Wall she left several deep fractures in its surface. Those fractures have been joined together by cracks and a huge chunk of the masonry has broken away. The jagged edged piece of stone falls to the ground with a boom. But it's not the fallen piece of rock that Armin and I are staring at. It's the single massive eye of the titan inside the Wall that draws our attention.


	24. Epilogue

Epilogue: A Woman named Starlight

The breeze blew softly through the small copse of trees, winding its way around the trunks, through the piles of golden autumn leaves and then finally whipping through the silver hair of the woman. She was not old, in fact she was not yet in her thirties, but her hair was a beautiful shade of silver like the stars. She'd been born that way, and that had earned her her name: Inlustre, meaning starlight in the language of the old world. As the wind rushed past her Inlustre placed a hand on the page of her book to stop it from flickering shut. When the breeze died she returned to reading. She'd read this story several times now, but it never grew old for her.

In a kingdom terrified by a terrible monster who came every night to the king's hall and stole away a person who never returned, a brave warrior came and pledged to rid them of their peril. Many such warriors had come before, and in every case they had all been slain. Deciding that there was no reason why this man should not also attempt the fateful battle and throw away his life, the king reluctantly granted him quarters for the night. When the beast came that night out of the darkness, the warrior fought with him and tore off his arm, which he hung over the door. The monster never returned to the King's lands, and the great warrior was hailed as a hero. He was crowned king and took the former king's daughter as his wife, and proved to be a great bulwark against all evils and terrors that the kingdom had to face. He fought and slayed dragons, hags, trolls and giants in the defense of his people. It was a little romanticized but Inlustre didn't mind. In fact it made her enjoy it all the more.

As she was reading her attention was disrupted by the sound of approaching hooves. She looked up to see a white horse with a young man astride it wearing brilliant blue and grey with a shining silver trim. Inlustre watched him in surprise. 'He looks like a nobleman, but what would a young lord be doing in this part of the Kingdom?' The man brought his horse to a stop when he saw her, and Inlustre turned rather pink when she realised he was staring. She tried to cover her face with her book.

"M'lady, please do not hide your face," said the man as he swung from his horse. "I, I don't believe I've ever seen another woman so beautiful in all my days."

"Th-thank you my lord," Inlustre replied, blushing.

"Tell me please, what is your name?"

"Inlustre, daughter of the farmer Harris son of Edmund."

"Inlustre. Your name is a most fitting one if I may say so. I am Prince Edward of the kingdom of Althand."

'The Prince!' Inlustre's heart beat quickened to a frightening pace. Hastily she bowed low down to the ground.

"No please don't," said the Prince, taking her hand and drawing her up to her feet. "I dislike all of the bowing and scraping to begin with, and I would not have such a fair lady on her knees before me." Inlustre couldn't think what she ought to say. Thankfully the Prince could. "Please, would it be acceptable if I were to spend sometime in conversation with you?"

Two years later and Princess Inlustre was standing out on the battlements of the great castle Ulundor, cradling her week old son in her arms. Prince Edward stop beside her with a hand placed fondly on her shoulder looking down lovingly at his son. "It has been a week now Edward," began Inlustre, "and still we have not decided on his name."

Edward laughed, "that is because you refuse to accept any of my suggestions!"

"Because as I see it we must name him after you. That is a great tradition amongst your family."

"I would not have it so. I would prefer it a name common to both our families and not just my own. He is your son as well as mine."

Inlustre sighed. "Very well, very well. What name would you have him given then?"

"It is a name that my great great grandfather bore. It he who defeated the Danes in the great northern war, Edmund III, the defender."

"Ah, just like my grandfather's name. It is a pleasant one I suppose, but tell me why is he named after Edmund III in particular?"

"Because my great great grandfather was mighty warrior and the defender of his people. We all remember him as a man who took up the throne in time of crisis and rescued our kingdom from a terrible peril. I believe that our son will have the same strength in him."

Inlustre smiled. "Very well, he is to be Edmund V then."

"Ay, the child of starlight."

 **Well, with the completion of the Stohess arc we are brought to the end of the first installment. It has been a lot of fun to write Humanity's Cage and so far it's proving to be a lot of fun to write Humanity's Strength as well. I'll be starting part 2 on the 12th of September so if you enjoyed this first part please stay tuned for the next one. I'd also like to say thank you to everyone who read this and a special thanks to all reviewers. I hope to see you all again for Part 2 of the Saga and the continuation of Matthias's adventures.**


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